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I think any couple who can still get excited over dom/sub type play, after being together for while, either are probably just having sex with a delusion, and not their partner. 

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What's to say these "characters" aren't closer to the real them, and who they are outside of there is the fake, the mask they wear for other people's expectations?

For myself at least, I've grown to identify with that part of myself and as I have become more shameless, it's surfaced more and more into my public self. I also can't enjoy sex as much without it (if at all). It's a selfish requirement, but we both have the same selfish want from opposite sides of the spectrum, so we allow ourselves to be mutually selfish.

BDSM is the foreplay that makes the sex itself better. It's bland and tasteless without it. For those I've been with who didn't fit my kinks, it felt more like clearing out the pipes than a primal sexually heated experience, and there was no connection at all. I can become a clingy... thing when the person is worthy of respect, but I am completely dismissive if they aren't compatible with me in that way.

Using my own experiences anyway, I'd argue the couple that's going strong in the BDSM department half a decade later has found someone more genuinely compatible. If it stops part way into the relationship, then it was probably just a phase or the passion might be fading.

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These posts made me laugh.
In response to some questions about D/S relations from Miss

by UKandle

 Is it really domination if both desire the same outcome?

 The outcome being you recreating your sexual experiences in childhood. I would say it was your odd uncle that came out as the dominant one. Dominatrix or slave it doesn't matter. The lot of you can't experience fucking without recreating the scenario of uncle fiddles tormenting you in the closet while your family plays cards. 

 

by UKandle

 how is the bdsm branch define it? :)

A group of sexually repressed retards who replace their sexual urges with sexual abuse. A culture who celebrates being conditioned to be weirdos that wear ridiculous costumes, act dramatic, and think they are unique and unbridled when clearly the opposite is the truth. 

or: uncle fiddles army

 

by UKandle

 Is that what happen to you poor thing?

 Sounds good to me. Maybe if I tell you I sucked my uncles cock while riding my mum's dildo I can relate to you better. Then I can replace the 'socio' in your life and you can fill these pages with your indecision/attention seeking behaviour and our backstory as the lead in. What do you think?

 

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by RichardParker



You of all guys know how he gets those man crushes and becomes obsessed. 

 

 In reference to yours truly

by RichardParker

These posts made me laugh.
In response to some questions about D/S relations from Miss

by UKandle

 Is it really domination if both desire the same outcome?

 The outcome being you recreating your sexual experiences in childhood. I would say it was your odd uncle that came out as the dominant one. Dominatrix or slave it doesn't matter. The lot of you can't experience fucking without recreating the scenario of uncle fiddles tormenting you in the closet while your family plays cards. 

 

by UKandle

 how is the bdsm branch define it? :)

A group of sexually repressed retards who replace their sexual urges with sexual abuse. A culture who celebrates being conditioned to be weirdos that wear ridiculous costumes, act dramatic, and think they are unique and unbridled when clearly the opposite is the truth. 

or: uncle fiddles army

 

by UKandle

 Is that what happen to you poor thing?

 Sounds good to me. Maybe if I tell you I sucked my uncles cock while riding my mum's dildo I can relate to you better. Then I can replace the 'socio' in your life and you can fill these pages with your indecision/attention seeking behaviour and our backstory as the lead in. What do you think?

 

 What were you saying about "Man crushes and becoming obsessed", again? If you're this slack in the work place, rich, it's no wonder you got your ass fired a few months ago. 

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Why do you see them as characters and not as their more genuine, vulnerable selves?

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Well, take a married couple say; who have been married for 5 years on- and they've been playing out the same role play scenarios as when they first started having sex- and it still excites them just as much- the only thing I can think of that would make it enjoyable still, is the characters they are playing. So they might just be having sex with some idea of themselves they don't get to otherwise exert in real life. 

I've heard that a lot of CEO types enjoy being a subs. 

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What makes you say that?

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Hence me saying the only way I can think they would really enjoy it after all those years. I am expressing my inability to see it another way.

 

Edit: Thank you for your perspective. I still can't imagine it though. I'd get bored as fuck.

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by Turncoat

What's to say these "characters" aren't closer to the real them, and who they are outside of there is the fake, the mask they wear for other people's expectations?

For myself at least, I've grown to identify with that part of myself and as I have become more shameless, it's surfaced more and more into my public self. I also can't enjoy sex as much without it (if at all). It's a selfish requirement, but we both have the same selfish want from opposite sides of the spectrum, so we allow ourselves to be mutually selfish.

BDSM is the foreplay that makes the sex itself better. It's bland and tasteless without it. For those I've been with who didn't fit my kinks, it felt more like clearing out the pipes than a primal sexually heated experience, and there was no connection at all. I can become a clingy... thing when the person is worthy of respect, but I am completely dismissive if they aren't compatible with me in that way.

Using my own experiences anyway, I'd argue the couple that's going strong in the BDSM department half a decade later has found someone more genuinely compatible. If it stops part way into the relationship, then it was probably just a phase or the passion might be fading.

EF, if I am understanding this correctly, are you trying to insinuate that the "original" character of these folk who engage in this sort of thing are "originally" supposed to be damaged fucked up individuals who need degradation to feel respected and loved? And I can't help but feel your need to justify anyone who touches this subject is because you are a masochist yourself. Why do you think you need to be degraded in order to enjoy it? What age did you discover it, and what was going on in your life to see this as "feeling"?

 

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Just LOL

Another time, perhaps, TC. When I have the energy. 

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