Personifying objects can be another form of splitting, especially if they feel like their objects are judging them.
Shut the fuck up it was adorable
From experience, I had a real weird relationship with my wristwatch growing up.
I had to stop wearing a watch to get over some things.
I'm not personifying my phone to such a degree. Also it's not weird to personify a phone when we've got digital assistants embedded in them
Personifying objects can be another form of splitting, especially if they feel like their objects are judging them.
Shut the fuck up it was adorable
From experience, I had a real weird relationship with my wristwatch growing up.
I had to stop wearing a watch to get over some things.I'm not personifying my phone to such a degree. Also it's not weird to personify a phone when we've got digital assistants embedded in them
More commonplace does not make it less weird.
It's like how people who talk to themselves learning to look like they're using a headset made it seem more socially acceptable... but at the end of the day it's still a dude talking to themselves.
Personifying objects can be another form of splitting, especially if they feel like their objects are judging them.
Shut the fuck up it was adorable
From experience, I had a real weird relationship with my wristwatch growing up.
I had to stop wearing a watch to get over some things.I'm not personifying my phone to such a degree. Also it's not weird to personify a phone when we've got digital assistants embedded in them
More commonplace does not make it less weird.
It's like how people who talk to themselves learning to look like they're using a headset made it seem more socially acceptable... but at the end of the day it's still a dude talking to themselves.
It's not the same at all!!
TC- I don't know that i should associate my feelings of anger with punching things. I've broken out of smashing and flinging ceramica on the floor, i can't just leave and be like "wait for me i need to go punch a bag" i do have a kicking dummy but that's more for boredom than aggression.
Cav- i think it's just that having a physical explosive has helped me somewhat get rid of it sooner, but i know that's not an option that is socially acceptable so it feel like i have to bottle it up especially in a workplace environment. I'm definitely not a stoic but i would have preferred some sort of antipathy to reactionary. Venting to my friends is an option but i don't want them to associate me with this anger. It feels shameful to not have control over it.
Tony i don't want your help, you're gross.
That's what friends are for, right? People that you can be yourself with, and wont be judgmental. You wont have to spend emotional labor putting up an image like you do everywhere else.
TC- I don't know that i should associate my feelings of anger with punching things. I've broken out of smashing and flinging ceramica on the floor, i can't just leave and be like "wait for me i need to go punch a bag" i do have a kicking dummy but that's more for boredom than aggression.
Cav- i think it's just that having a physical explosive has helped me somewhat get rid of it sooner, but i know that's not an option that is socially acceptable so it feel like i have to bottle it up especially in a workplace environment. I'm definitely not a stoic but i would have preferred some sort of antipathy to reactionary. Venting to my friends is an option but i don't want them to associate me with this anger. It feels shameful to not have control over it.
Tony i don't want your help, you're gross.
That's what friends are for, right? People that you can be yourself with, and wont be judgmental. You wont have to spend emotional labor putting up an image like you do everywhere else.
It feels a lot like having to depend on them to make you feel better and still i wouldn't want them to know about my anger issues. Having people i know realize that i struggle with anger and mental health and emotional instability is shameful. While i wouldn't shame others or make them feel like i pity them if they do struggle as well, i can't seem to allow myself to let my irl friends know about this for fear that I'll be treated as a lesser it's why i don't tell most of them i have bpd, especially with the way media portrays mental illness and personality disorders.
TC- I don't know that i should associate my feelings of anger with punching things. I've broken out of smashing and flinging ceramica on the floor, i can't just leave and be like "wait for me i need to go punch a bag" i do have a kicking dummy but that's more for boredom than aggression.
Cav- i think it's just that having a physical explosive has helped me somewhat get rid of it sooner, but i know that's not an option that is socially acceptable so it feel like i have to bottle it up especially in a workplace environment. I'm definitely not a stoic but i would have preferred some sort of antipathy to reactionary. Venting to my friends is an option but i don't want them to associate me with this anger. It feels shameful to not have control over it.
Tony i don't want your help, you're gross.
That's what friends are for, right? People that you can be yourself with, and wont be judgmental. You wont have to spend emotional labor putting up an image like you do everywhere else.
It feels a lot like having to depend on them to make you feel better and still i wouldn't want them to know about my anger issues. Having people i know realize that i struggle with anger and mental health and emotional instability is shameful. While i wouldn't shame others or make them feel like i pity them if they do struggle as well, i can't seem to allow myself to let my irl friends know about this for fear that I'll be treated as a lesser it's why i don't tell most of them i have bpd, especially with the way media portrays mental illness and personality disorders.
Do you see a therapist? Maybe thats what a therapist would be for. Online friends can also probably help.
I think its acceptable to express your emotions without telling your irl friends that you have bpd, I often tell others when I'm angry.
TC- I don't know that i should associate my feelings of anger with punching things. I've broken out of smashing and flinging ceramica on the floor, i can't just leave and be like "wait for me i need to go punch a bag" i do have a kicking dummy but that's more for boredom than aggression.
Cav- i think it's just that having a physical explosive has helped me somewhat get rid of it sooner, but i know that's not an option that is socially acceptable so it feel like i have to bottle it up especially in a workplace environment. I'm definitely not a stoic but i would have preferred some sort of antipathy to reactionary. Venting to my friends is an option but i don't want them to associate me with this anger. It feels shameful to not have control over it.
Tony i don't want your help, you're gross.
That's what friends are for, right? People that you can be yourself with, and wont be judgmental. You wont have to spend emotional labor putting up an image like you do everywhere else.
It feels a lot like having to depend on them to make you feel better and still i wouldn't want them to know about my anger issues. Having people i know realize that i struggle with anger and mental health and emotional instability is shameful. While i wouldn't shame others or make them feel like i pity them if they do struggle as well, i can't seem to allow myself to let my irl friends know about this for fear that I'll be treated as a lesser it's why i don't tell most of them i have bpd, especially with the way media portrays mental illness and personality disorders.
i think within reason, expressing your anger to your friends is ok, but i have got the sense i've freaked ppl out sometimes with the level of anger lol
don't tell ppl u have bpd unless rare exception but in my mind, they will either invalidate me based on it, or i will think they are invalidating me based on it lmao & you can't 'untell' them. i feel like having 'anger issues' is so much more commonplace and acceptable. there is no shame in anger my sweet princess, and you might have to do trial and error in expressing it till it starts to get easier. keeping it in is the worst, and you'll just absolutely lose your shit one day
TC- I don't know that i should associate my feelings of anger with punching things. I've broken out of smashing and flinging ceramica on the floor, i can't just leave and be like "wait for me i need to go punch a bag" i do have a kicking dummy but that's more for boredom than aggression.
Cav- i think it's just that having a physical explosive has helped me somewhat get rid of it sooner, but i know that's not an option that is socially acceptable so it feel like i have to bottle it up especially in a workplace environment. I'm definitely not a stoic but i would have preferred some sort of antipathy to reactionary. Venting to my friends is an option but i don't want them to associate me with this anger. It feels shameful to not have control over it.
Tony i don't want your help, you're gross.
That's what friends are for, right? People that you can be yourself with, and wont be judgmental. You wont have to spend emotional labor putting up an image like you do everywhere else.
It feels a lot like having to depend on them to make you feel better and still i wouldn't want them to know about my anger issues. Having people i know realize that i struggle with anger and mental health and emotional instability is shameful. While i wouldn't shame others or make them feel like i pity them if they do struggle as well, i can't seem to allow myself to let my irl friends know about this for fear that I'll be treated as a lesser it's why i don't tell most of them i have bpd, especially with the way media portrays mental illness and personality disorders.
Do you see a therapist? Maybe thats what a therapist would be for. Online friends can also probably help.
I think its acceptable to express your emotions without telling your irl friends that you have bpd, I often tell others when I'm angry.
I haven't seen one in years but I'm familiar with the workbooks and i have one, i just simply didn't do it because it's spooky to have a physical reminder that there's something wrong with you. It's in a storage unit a couple of minutes away from me.
Telling my friends means being vulnerable and no longer being on equal footing. It also means having to be completely honest about the why and i don't see them keeping the same opinion of me afterwards. It's because i know them pretty well that i don't feel i can trust them to understand me and my anger/instability
TC- I don't know that i should associate my feelings of anger with punching things. I've broken out of smashing and flinging ceramica on the floor, i can't just leave and be like "wait for me i need to go punch a bag" i do have a kicking dummy but that's more for boredom than aggression.
Cav- i think it's just that having a physical explosive has helped me somewhat get rid of it sooner, but i know that's not an option that is socially acceptable so it feel like i have to bottle it up especially in a workplace environment. I'm definitely not a stoic but i would have preferred some sort of antipathy to reactionary. Venting to my friends is an option but i don't want them to associate me with this anger. It feels shameful to not have control over it.
Tony i don't want your help, you're gross.
That's what friends are for, right? People that you can be yourself with, and wont be judgmental. You wont have to spend emotional labor putting up an image like you do everywhere else.
It feels a lot like having to depend on them to make you feel better and still i wouldn't want them to know about my anger issues. Having people i know realize that i struggle with anger and mental health and emotional instability is shameful. While i wouldn't shame others or make them feel like i pity them if they do struggle as well, i can't seem to allow myself to let my irl friends know about this for fear that I'll be treated as a lesser it's why i don't tell most of them i have bpd, especially with the way media portrays mental illness and personality disorders.
i think within reason, expressing your anger to your friends is ok, but i have got the sense i've freaked ppl out sometimes with the level of anger lol
don't tell ppl u have bpd unless rare exception but in my mind, they will either invalidate me based on it, or i will think they are invalidating me based on it lmao & you can't 'untell' them. i feel like having 'anger issues' is so much more commonplace and acceptable. there is no shame in anger my sweet princess, and you might have to do trial and error in expressing it till it starts to get easier. keeping it in is the worst, and you'll just absolutely lose your shit one day
Yes!
You've put it into words exactly. I think the swing from normal Lena, to Lena has anger issues she's attempting to hide to save face would be too much. I've felt close to just going ape shit. I fear i might and might end up on a compilation video of Karen's in the wild and i will absolutely do something drastic.
TC- I don't know that i should associate my feelings of anger with punching things. I've broken out of smashing and flinging ceramica on the floor, i can't just leave and be like "wait for me i need to go punch a bag" i do have a kicking dummy but that's more for boredom than aggression.
Cav- i think it's just that having a physical explosive has helped me somewhat get rid of it sooner, but i know that's not an option that is socially acceptable so it feel like i have to bottle it up especially in a workplace environment. I'm definitely not a stoic but i would have preferred some sort of antipathy to reactionary. Venting to my friends is an option but i don't want them to associate me with this anger. It feels shameful to not have control over it.
Tony i don't want your help, you're gross.
That's what friends are for, right? People that you can be yourself with, and wont be judgmental. You wont have to spend emotional labor putting up an image like you do everywhere else.
It feels a lot like having to depend on them to make you feel better and still i wouldn't want them to know about my anger issues. Having people i know realize that i struggle with anger and mental health and emotional instability is shameful. While i wouldn't shame others or make them feel like i pity them if they do struggle as well, i can't seem to allow myself to let my irl friends know about this for fear that I'll be treated as a lesser it's why i don't tell most of them i have bpd, especially with the way media portrays mental illness and personality disorders.
Do you see a therapist? Maybe thats what a therapist would be for. Online friends can also probably help.
I think its acceptable to express your emotions without telling your irl friends that you have bpd, I often tell others when I'm angry.
I haven't seen one in years but I'm familiar with the workbooks and i have one, i just simply didn't do it because it's spooky to have a physical reminder that there's something wrong with you. It's in a storage unit a couple of minutes away from me.
Telling my friends means being vulnerable and no longer being on equal footing. It also means having to be completely honest about the why and i don't see them keeping the same opinion of me afterwards. It's because i know them pretty well that i don't feel i can trust them to understand me and my anger/instability
no one needs to see u as without fault, that's so much pressure to put on yourself. i wouldn't really open up to someone before they had opened up to me though, cos then i would be really uncomfortable.
also, rather than looking at it as there being something 'wrong with you', maybe look at it as having a serious disorder that you are incredibly strong to be able to deal with and still be a kind lovely person. many people (ahem) take that and run with it as an excuse to be an awful person
