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If you want to work on your depression, you should start with the caffeine. 

There isn't going to be some magic words you'll find from hopping therapist-to-therapist, youtube video-to-video. If you want to feel better you'll need to start on a chemical level by detoxing the stimulant, and if you won't do it then you don't really want to fix the problem. 

Ę̵̚x̸͎̾i̴͚̽s̵̻͐t̷͐ͅe̷̯͠n̴̤̚t̵̻̅i̵͉̿a̴̮͊l̵͍̂ ̴̹̕D̵̤̀e̸͓͂t̵̢͂e̴͕̓c̸̗̄t̴̗̿ï̶̪v̷̲̍é̵͔
last edit on 12/3/2020 5:38:45 PM
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Yeah I'm aware like, diet and nutrition, gut health, metabolic function is half the battle. 

 

i have a functional medicine doctor who is also an endocrinologist and nutritionist/dietitian and in process of becoming a dermatologist as well. so she's very knowledgable and equipped at helping me like, do the right things for my body in particular. 

 

she told me that i can have one cup of coffee in the morning but, have to wait thirty minutes before i take any of my nutritional supplements in or it will be wasted and, she's given me a specific diet, which aligns to my very detailed analysis of blood work 

 

but yeah she did explain to me exactly how the caffeine effects my body and like, why it's better to avoid the coffee bean all together, not just, uh, caffeine or, even having decaf coffee. the actual coffee bean itself isn't even healthy. 

 

if you're into nootropics than you know why. but yeah, i also, know for example like, gluten. lowers motivation and causes inflammation in the gut, which is terrible for absorption and creation of, serotonin ultimately. 

 

but, i have more going on than just, a slight gluten intolerance. my body doesn't seem to be like, absorbing b12 or creating iron, and on top of that, i have a horomonal imbalance- double the estrogen a normal person should have. and, to top of it off, my uh, my adrenal and cortisol glands are completely shot. most people's have sort of an eb and flow which can be examined on a chart, where it spikes and peaks at certain points in the day. but mine is just baseline the entire time. flat, like i'm dead. 

last edit on 12/3/2020 5:46:54 PM
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0 votes RE: Journal

i remember when my life had meaning. now it doesn't 

Posts: 33589
0 votes RE: Journal

So in other words you know how it's bad for you, and that's good enough? 

You were advised to have one cup a day, but you have tons more. 

Ę̵̚x̸͎̾i̴͚̽s̵̻͐t̷͐ͅe̷̯͠n̴̤̚t̵̻̅i̵͉̿a̴̮͊l̵͍̂ ̴̹̕D̵̤̀e̸͓͂t̵̢͂e̴͕̓c̸̗̄t̴̗̿ï̶̪v̷̲̍é̵͔
last edit on 12/4/2020 7:58:00 PM
Posts: 33589
0 votes RE: Journal
Blanc said: 

i remember when my life had meaning. now it doesn't 

What changed? 

Ę̵̚x̸͎̾i̴͚̽s̵̻͐t̷͐ͅe̷̯͠n̴̤̚t̵̻̅i̵͉̿a̴̮͊l̵͍̂ ̴̹̕D̵̤̀e̸͓͂t̵̢͂e̴͕̓c̸̗̄t̴̗̿ï̶̪v̷̲̍é̵͔
Posts: 842
0 votes RE: Journal
Blanc said: 

i remember when my life had meaning. now it doesn't 

What changed? 

 Her life had meaning. Now it doesn't

Posts: 9480
0 votes RE: Journal

Empty

Posts: 9480
0 votes RE: Journal

Fuck everything 

Posts: 9480
0 votes RE: Journal

I think a large deal of my issue as far as ptsd issues go 

 

is how your ability to grow up gets stunted and you can be kind of immature or developmentally off 

 

and this affects everything or is more of a core issue in the dynamic of issues 

 

they all simulteneoislu affect one another making each other worse but yeah 

 

I think that makes sense and take a lot of the pressure off of me constantly aski my myself why am I like this 

 

I’m no professional but it’s probably that

last edit on 12/6/2020 1:10:22 AM
Posts: 9480
0 votes RE: Journal

often Try too hard to fit a round peg into square hole 

 

have a hard time just accepting myself and also ummmmmmmmm as gay as it sounds 

 

were all just human beings not human doings

last edit on 12/6/2020 8:59:21 AM
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