wow. Glad to see someone shedding light on the very rare forms of dissociation.
So now you don't just have dissociation, you have a very rare form of it?
You're just a Cyberchondriac.
The more that I let go the more I am remembering chunks of my life I had forgotten they come to me in glimpses and it’s examples of times where I felt conflicted of who I was or instances there was evidence of there being a fragmentation of self far earlier than I recognized the dissonance
for the first time I am starting to feel peace and like I can move on
like I’m slowly, beginning to get unstuck
You've said this multiple times, and you never get better.
You tend to work in cycles instead, inevitably falling back onto reruns.
wow. Glad to see someone shedding light on the very rare forms of dissociation.
So now you don't just have dissociation, you have a very rare form of it?
You're just a Cyberchondriac.
No i wasn’t saying i have these rare forms. That’s why i said, “wow.” Because i was sort of baffled by it. I had no idea these existed or people were experiencing this. 9
Blanc said:This is so important to raise awareness about all the different forms of dissociationWhy?
Because people may not know what they’re experiencing is called dissociation and is a reason to seek help
they may be struggling with severe ptsd from trauma and not even know that what they’re going through has a diagnosis and is treatable
Like I’ve been saying for the past little while in here, I’ve been remembering a lot more of my childhood lately.
And this has continued, yesterday i was remembering so much stuff.
Ever since i got one memory triggered forward of dance class it’s started trickling in and yesterday it was like an avalanche of information.
Once again not all of it but like.
I was really impressed with what i was managing to recall. It’s hard to explain how it works its very weird.
It’s like, reaching into a dark hat and pulling out something surprising like a bunny rabbit.
It’s not like, I’m not aware that I tangibly have the memories, i don’t feel that i have them or know that they’re there.
But if I try to think hard enough, an item will come up out of the dark randomly and it will bring a memory with it.
Like with the dance class memory, it was remembering the “window” that I stared out, that brought it back.
And then i remembered the phone, on the desk, there. And i sort of travelled through the entire span of memories, across a long period of time, by recalling, items that were there. Like anchors to guide me through.
The issue is now that, i don’t have a canvas or a time line i can look back at like one w hole picture and say, “yeah this was my life, i remember it front to back.”
but instead its more like, i have the ability to generate random recall, at random times. And then once i remember it- it can be gone in 2 seconds, if i dont focus on it enough. And, tomorrow, who knows if i will be a able to pull the same item out from the dark. I might pull out different items. And have no idea whats missing.
So its still in the dark and fragmented, and i don’t, remember. But. I’m able to have recall, where as before it was just total darkness spanning across years. Lke literally no recollection of what happened or like, the experience of, being me, in my life, as a child.
So yea...thats amazing because i honestly never thought I’d get that back but i was really hoping and trying and wanting to remember.
But yeah, then, if i do write it down, and sort of go over it a lot, i might be able to memorize it and sort of, thwart the fact that the past is blocked out, by bringing the memories forward and re-writing them into my current memory.
So that way i do have access and its not all in the dark and eventually i am able to piece together a fairly whole picture.
I’m just, still, remembering little glimpses. And, uh. I haven’t like, connected with it, yet. But i can, see it. If that makes sense.
It’s just so relieving to finally be able to remember stuff like, wow. It just, its such a good feeling, i can’t describe the relief.
I over did it today lol it hurts to laugh
oh god.
I’ve been cleaning but I did too much and though it was worth it because everything looks clean
Im so beat. And I’m already aching
hopefully tomorrow I won’t wake up still aching
but right now, it’s, slightly worrying because it hurts to breathe
I definitely over did it I’m very aware of that but
hopefully I wake up tomorrow and it’s gone cuz this hurts and I’m mildly worried about it
Blanc said:This is so important to raise awareness about all the different forms of dissociationWhy?
Because people may not know what they’re experiencing is called dissociation and is a reason to seek help
Is this more urgent than other disorders when it comes to increasing awareness? I see a lot less dangers coming from dissociation than most others, and much of it's as a symptom of something instead of solely on it's own.
they may be struggling with severe ptsd from trauma and not even know that what they’re going through has a diagnosis and is treatable
Pretty sure if someone's undergoing PTSD trauma that they're aware something's going on.
