>no mention of Jim
wasted my time reading that bullshit
"Discussing it seems like a proper approach. Or was. Now we are getting a bit repetitive."
Discussing your life was never anything I brought up(asides referencing the possibility of you keeping a notebook for your friends) You should stop seeing things that aren't there.
"It's not about you. Hypothesis of insecurity was raised, I read about it and decided I could also take some tests. I have addressed those attempts, I think, and added some more related input."
Yet, who raised the question in the first place, if not about me it's definitely for me. Who else is raising the question?
"You're doing well too, I think, no need to bring it up twice."
Oh I hit a soft spot? sorry~
As long as it stands to contradict your testament or support my claims, it'll be brought up as many times as needed.
"I can compliment you on some things and insult on others, can't I?"
It's less of that and the manner in which it is done. Praise to my face, while insults behind my back.
"There's no reason to continue, but no reason to stop either. It is not something I actively do. The list was made in 4-5 sittings throughout a few months. Why would I stray away from it now?"
You don't see how paying this much attention to the opinion of others in such a manner can subconsciously lead to becoming more vain? If there's truly no benefit, there's nothing but effort exhausted. It's not even logical to continue unless you value those opinions.
"Privacy is a serious matter to me, that's all. "
Seems entirely contradictory and shows how desperate things have gotten for you if despite valuing privacy, you're willing to publicly declare you'll share video evidence simply to prove a point.
You're free to elaborate I'm affected by this, I've provided a sufficient amount of examples to show my impact on you
By the way, glad to know im on your mind
I've provided clear cut explanations to all of my accusations and claims. What I'm having hard time understanding is that you're not seeing is that your actions unquestionably translate out to that of a insecure person. You're either in denial or delusional. My bet is on delusional after hearing and seeing a couple instances, the most notable was when you thought sugar was upset/jealous at mika and jim because you somehow came to a conclusion she was romantically possessive over you.
Another such instance is when you told sugar new users come to the forum, then assume you're the mod here commonly and apologize when they have to leave the forum. This when coupled with the insecure behavior tells me something, I think you have a serious image problem/ego problem
Possibly, but that's not even what that's about now and if that was the case he shouldn't have let it progressed as long as he did(this situation didn't work out in his favor). I'd like to add in that with my personal interactions with Mee, i've recognized exactly what that was. It's typical behavior for him and it has been for years. In the past he's also used this as an insult before.
Aww...
If he wanted no part in this, he could've simply stopped posts ago.
I agree wholeheartedly.
He's making more and more effort to disprove his insecurity, while my input has required no additional effort, his measures are getting more drastic. I see no reason to stop pressing the issue.
I do not mind elaborating on things and I would not call my measures more drastic.
wow. touchy subject huh? what i can take from your statement 'regardless of the taunting and poking attempts' is that however bad, insecure or inexperienced this makes you look, it is but a mere grain which pales in comparison to the horror of the truth regarding you and girls. i mean you're pretty indifferent to most subjects but you've written an entire disclaimer on how you will refrain from having any type of discussion regarding relationships.
I consider most interpersonal matters as more private. I mean, I always walk to a secluded area to answer a phone call, do not let anyone peek at my phone/computer screen when other people are involved, etc. I did not elaborate on my friends either, boyfriend girlfriend relationship seems to be even more private. It was nothing bad :D
considering you wanted to kill your mother this would have been especially interesting..something that is a rarity when it comes to you :D
lol. You keep bringing that mother bit, why? I mean, the event itself revolved around me starting to contemplate that killing her would solve the issue of the annoying gibberish I had to listen to. The fact that she is my mother, i.e. somewhat closer person, made me think more about it. I mean, I have beaten some peers when they breached the limit of my patience (though I got away with it by not being a regular bully and explaining how they provoked me). Usual conflict would go something like this:
Mother returns home, starts shouting something. Mee looks at her demeaningly and provides some remarks, thus making the situation worse. Mother gets tired of screaming and demands Mee to go sit in a couch and begin discussing the matter.
Mother: You did not do ... and ..., behaved in a ... way, therefore you will not go to the school trip (or some other punishment).
Mee: thinks a little bit okay starts pondering how he will spend the holiday
Mother: [something something], you are forbidden from attending the school trip.
Mee: I have heard you the first time you said it, no need to repeat.
Mother: [something something again], most of your peers do various things to appease their parents so they would let them go on the trip.
Mee: Well... I didn't. No trip for me. continues planning
Mother: [more somethings] It is necessary to socialize, so I will allow you to go...
Mee: [interrupts] I don't really care if I go or not, so get to the point.
Mother: I will allow you to go if you do ... and ... (and so on).
Mee: makes a very expressive thinking face makes eye contact I think I could manage ... and ..., but ... and ... are major deal breakers.
Mother: agreeing but trying to appear in control Let's agree on it, but you have to rethink your behavior.
Mee: sure... stands up, goes halfway towards where mother is sitting can I go now? eye contact
Mother: yes.
Mee then goes to his room and does his bidding. Mother goes to have a smoke, drink some alcohol from the bar. Comes to Mee's room after a while, hugs and apologizes for being angry. Mee says that it is okay but he is not too fond of the cigarette and alcohol scent. Mother leaves the room.
curtain closes
Other times and later on we would go straight to the discussion, skipping the shouting part, which used to make me annoyed and her angry.
i can analyze how you behave around females though. it's like you have this james bond/casanova image that you want to put across but whatever shizoid/autistic or otherwise limitations you're dealing with, make your demeanor slightly awkward and embarrassing. you're not terrible looking so i'm sure girls generally like you until you open your mouth and the awkwardness becomes too great to bear.
By sharing same life stories, photographic content, etc. here I have noticed how different people interpret same things differently. You are the first to come up with some James Bond/Casanova image, with which I am not inclined to agree. I am quite introverted, so I do not talk much in general, therefore even if my behavior would be potentially repelling, I doubt that it would be noticed. People of both genders tend to chat me up and do it more often than I would prefer.
only explored relationships in your teens though? why am i getting the image of a 10 year old mee awkwardly standing on the opposite side of the playground as his 'girlfriend' and never having had exchanged a single word directly to her
No relationships of such caliber or interpersonal coitus for almost two years (since I started studying).
you say you're not gay, so perhaps you're asexual? is that something you've ever considered?
I am not actively gay. I could be anything. On the other hand, Jimmee rp does not make me aroused, so maybe it is not an area worth exploring.
Discussing your life was never anything I brought up(asides referencing the possibility of you keeping a notebook for your friends) You should stop seeing things that aren't there.
I think that me being insecure would have an impact on my life, which is why I elaborated on the matter, telling that it does not seem to fit.
Yet, who raised the question in the first place, if not about me it's definitely for me. Who else is raising the question?
You are not as important regarding the matter as you think you are. It does not matter who raised the question. The idea of me being insecure came up, I analyzed it. It just so happens that you were the one to bring it up.
Oh I hit a soft spot? sorry~
As long as it stands to contradict your testament or support my claims, it'll be brought up as many times as needed.
I thought that I did :/ I most definitely don't mind you reminding me that I live a decent life.
It's less of that and the manner in which it is done. Praise to my face, while insults behind my back.
For all I know, a note, directed to you in a thread is not me going behind your back. It remains available for people to see, unlike things, said in the main chat, and you did notice it (and involved yourself into the discussion voluntarily shortly after).
You don't see how paying this much attention to the opinion of others in such a manner can subconsciously lead to becoming more vain? If there's truly no benefit, there's nothing but effort exhausted. It's not even logical to continue unless you value those opinions.
Analyzing criticism and deciding whether or not to improve oneself in that regard and determining the legitimacy of some praise could indeed influence one to 'have or show an excessively high opinion of one's appearance, abilities, or worth" [be vain]. But then again, it also leads to self improvement and management. Lastly, receiving such ideas helps to better understand oneself. I mean, I had little understanding regarding the decency of my looks until some photo shares were made here. Same applies for some other features too. All things considered, it does not seem to be a bad thing, while taken the received information with a grain of salt. I'm quite sure that some things were said to misguide me.
Seems entirely contradictory and shows how desperate things have gotten for you if despite valuing privacy, you're willing to publicly declare you'll share video evidence simply to prove a point.
Did you really not understand what I was saying? You brought up the idea that I have sorted the traits by noting the sources. I said I did not and that I can provide evidence (i.e. a photo of the page with the random, chaotic word spree) to those, who are concerned that I did it in your implied fashion.
I've provided clear cut explanations to all of my accusations and claims. What I'm having hard time understanding is that you're not seeing is that your actions unquestionably translate out to that of a insecure person. You're either in denial or delusional. My bet is on delusional after hearing and seeing a couple instances
Could it be that you want to believe that I am so you would be right?
the most notable was when you thought sugar was upset/jealous at mika and jim because you somehow came to a conclusion she was romantically possessive over you.
Your previous idea of me not being direct would interfere with me doing this if I perceived it as a serious matter. I was amused by the coincidence of how I was being ignored by Sugar during her anti-fag campaign and soon after the pic exchange with Missy in the anime thread, so at first I shared it with Jim. We laughed more and a bit later I pm'd Sugar about it. Simple. Also, romantic involvement was never put up for a question. I mean, it seems a bit silly considering the circumstances of interaction, i.e. online chats. Don't you agree?
Another such instance is when you told sugar new users come to the forum, then assume you're the mod here commonly and apologize when they have to leave the forum. This when coupled with the insecure behavior tells me something, I think you have a serious image problem/ego problem
I told that to a few people and I have witnessed these things with my own eyes. I mean, I pm quite a few newbies saying "Hello. What has brought you to this place?" and then proceed making questions and some short pointers about how they should behave. It does not seem very surprising that they would ask me if I am the moderator at some point, especially considering the formal image we previously discussed. Some newbies/puppets disappear soon after, others stay and we pm a bit longer. Niserri, for example, came here looking for a sociopath like herself, so I brought [one forum member] to SC from Skype and they pm'd. [said forum member] played a total wannabe and Nissi was very pleased (I received the chat log soon after). Later when I asked Nissi how it went she stated that it was me, toying with her behind the [forum member] account xD In short, the mentioned statements are too real for me to think that I am delusional.
"I do not mind elaborating on things and I would not call my measures more drastic."
You're right it's more towards being desperate at this point
"I think that me being insecure would have an impact on my life, which is why I elaborated on the matter, telling that it does not seem to fit."
What you're missing entirely is that what you say about what goes on in your personal life off sc is useless as a counterpoint. There's no way to verify if what you're actually saying is true, which is why I've adamantly stayed on the way you've presented yourself on the forum. How you ever thought that would disprove my points that were based on concrete evidence, is beyond me. You either didn't think this through or you were desperate.
"You are not as important regarding the matter as you think you are. It does not matter who raised the question. The idea of me being insecure came up, I analyzed it. It just so happens that you were the one to bring it up."
All of your explanations, excuses and posts regarding insecurity are towards me. It irks you to see how much you got invested in all of this doesn't it?
"I thought that I did :/ I most definitely don't mind you reminding me that I live a decent life."
I'll definitely hold on to this instance for awhile. It's such a peculiar reaction when faced with the accusation of insecurity, you do possibly the worst thing to help your case. It's like if I accused you of being gay and you elaborated/ranted about on every single woman you've slept with and in which manner, then proceed to insist it's solid proof you aren't gay.
"For all I know, a note, directed to you in a thread is not me going behind your back."
You certainly have shown you dont(choose to) see a lot.
"Analyzing criticism and deciding whether or not to improve oneself in that regard and determining the legitimacy of some praise could indeed influence one to 'have or show an excessively high opinion of one's appearance, abilities, or worth" [be vain]. But then again, it also leads to self improvement and management."
I know I and a couple others have already went over why the information you gather from this site isn't reliable and you insist on being willing to change on that. In a healthy self improvement circumstance, outside perspectives wouldn't make up half of the process. With all the contradictory and skew opinions you've noted they show little to no correlation to anything. You have more antonyms than you do synonyms.
"Lastly, receiving such ideas helps to better understand oneself. I mean, I had little understanding regarding the decency of my looks until some photo shares were made here."
No one has ever gave you an honest opinion of how you look off the internet?
"Same applies for some other features too. All things considered, it does not seem to be a bad thing, while taken the received information with a grain of salt. I'm quite sure that some things were said to misguide me."
I really can't stress enough how unreliable the information you've gathered here is, but it's clear you won't see my point or that of others. Only thing that matters is that you find and cling to one valid excuse as to why you have this notebook(asides being insecure)
"Did you really not understand what I was saying? You brought up the idea that I have sorted the traits by noting the sources. I said I did not and that I can provide evidence (i.e. a photo of the page with the random, chaotic word spree) to those, who are concerned that I did it in your implied fashion."
This again is the same logic you used with telling me how great your life is. Who's the say you'll actually show the real notebook? Where your head is at to even consider this as a counterpoint is hysterical. And yes, my point still stands. For someone who claims to almost exclusively talk in pm's and puts an emphasis on his privacy, you're now all of a sudden ready to show the public your personal notebook? Either there isn't much that's at stake(it's fake) or again you are that desperate.
"Could it be that you want to believe that I am so you would be right?"
My conclusions didn't come from no where, they're all mainly based off of what you've shown right here in this thread and you have yet to put up a solid excuse.
As for sugar's testament about you assuming she was jealous over you, I can't verify that. I have only what I've seen of you two speaking of it and your supporting behaviors that'd incline you'd do such a thing
"I told that to a few people and I have witnessed these things with my own eyes. I mean, I pm quite a few newbies saying "Hello. What has brought you to this place?" and then proceed making questions and some short pointers about how they should behave. It does not seem very surprising that they would ask me if I am the moderator at some point, especially considering the formal image we previously discussed. Some newbies/puppets disappear soon after, others stay and we pm a bit longer."
Are you sure this is your story? Or are you going to change it again in chat when you get called out? This is the second time I've heard this version twice now about how newcomers assumed you were a mod because of your demeanor, but someone remembered you were telling them you were the mod in pm. They didn't come to some conclusion that you were a mod from your behavior(as you so adamantly defended in chat and to a lesser degree now). Let's not forget your excuse changed only after you were called out on the matter and you insisted you told them but meant that all along.
Mee stated: source post
It's funny how both sides are thinking that they are calm and that the other is effected.
I think it's fairly obvious who's affected and who's not.
What you're missing entirely is that what you say about what goes on in your personal life off sc is useless as a counterpoint. There's no way to verify if what you're actually saying is true, which is why I've adamantly stayed on the way you've presented yourself on the forum. How you ever thought that would disprove my points that were based on concrete evidence, is beyond me. You either didn't think this through or you were desperate; My conclusions didn't come from no where, they're all mainly based off of what you've shown right here in this thread and you have yet to put up a solid excuse.
While it is not a solid proof for you, it is to me... And I most certainly not have to put up a solid excuse for anything. Nevertheless, it would be marvelous if you could come up with a well-formed list of traits and explanations, e.g. [ ] seems to be fitting/worthy of consideration because [ ]. Ideas how to deal with these traits are also appreciated.
All of your explanations, excuses and posts regarding insecurity are towards me. It irks you to see how much you got invested in all of this doesn't it?
It was a nice chat aside of the Negroe GIF and you sometimes making an impression of being rude and/or rough with me.
I'll definitely hold on to this instance for awhile. It's such a peculiar reaction when faced with the accusation of insecurity, you do possibly the worst thing to help your case. It's like if I accused you of being gay and you elaborated on every single woman you've slept with and in which manner, then proceed to insist it's solid proof you aren't gay.
What? It would be the bestest proof o.O
I know I and a couple others have already went over why the information you gather from this site isn't reliable and you insist on being willing to change on that. In a healthy self improvement circumstance, outside perspectives wouldn't make up half of the process. With all the contradictory and skew opinions you've noted they show little to no correlation to anything. You have more antonyms than you do synonyms.
I did note that it is a almost full, unsorted list. It is in such a state right now and will remain to be until I decide that I have gathered enough input to work with. Then sorting will happen (some things can be crossed out and so on) and conclusions will be made. Like I said, there's no rush. Criticism, however, was considered and either dismissed or taken into consideration for the most part already.
No one has ever gave you an honest opinion of how you look off the internet?
I can recall quite a few things said in a playful fashion, but does it count as a honest approach? The more honest statements would be two friends expressing their surprise that I am single (during the period of me studying).
I really can't stress enough how unreliable the information you've gathered here is, but it's clear you won't see my point or that of others. Only thing that matters is that you find and cling to one valid excuse as to why you have this notebook(asides being insecure)
I do not track my bowel movement, probably because I perceive it as a matter, not fitting to be tracked in a notebook, but I have notebooks for many things in which I take part or posses interest. When did I say that the information was reliable?
This again is the same logic you used with telling me how great your life is. Who's the say you'll actually show the real notebook? Where your head is at to even consider this as a counterpoint is hysterical. And yes, my point still stands. For someone who claims to almost exclusively talk in pm's and puts an emphasis on his privacy, you're now all of a sudden ready to show the public your personal notebook? Either there isn't much that's at stake(it's fake) or again you are that desperate.
I put out the offer in case someone was concerned about it and I did note that the share would happen in PM and with my agreement.
Are you sure this is your story? Or are you going to change it again in chat when you get called out? This is the second time I've heard this version twice now about how newcomers assumed you were a mod because of your demeanor, but someone remembered you were telling them you were the mod in pm. They didn't come to some conclusion that you were a mod from your behavior(as you so adamantly defended in chat and to a lesser degree now). Let's not forget your excuse changed only after you were called out on the matter and you insisted you told them but meant that all along.
I honestly doubt that some member remembered me telling some newbie in PM about being a mod.I did tell Dexter that I was a mod and urged him to spam once, constantly telling how he is a failure at that. I could have also said something like that to some newbie in the public chat while goofing around, which might be what Alena remembered or thought she did. Other than that, if it came up, it was not brought up by me and I clarified them that I wasn't. So yes, I am sure.