LOL OK. Fair enough.
"2. Surveillance monitoring. Does he constantly phone you, text you and stalk your Facebook account? Does he need to know exactly where you are at all times? Does he become angry if you don't immediately return missed calls from him? Does he attempt to subtlety regulate your dress (i.e. by stating that "that dress is a little low, isn't it?" or similar such crap)? In the latter of these instances he may offer you unlimited access to his finances. This may seem great at first, but he might be using his credit card statements to monitor your activities."
Been there, save for the finances part. 
A little of #3 too.
It's a good thing you got out when you did. These practices are precursors to physical violence, which is in fact a combination of the physical, the emotional and the psychological. Once you're in that deep, escape is much more difficult.
Hi Claire,
A tip: don't trust anything anyone says on here (including me, most of the time). If you truly are an empath (that term isn't commonly accepted among psychologists), you're able to discern others' true intentions and motives even when they're lying, at least most of the time. However, that becomes exponentially more difficult on an online forum. Sociopaths can be capable of loyalty, and most know the difference between "right" and "wrong" on a cognitive level -- they just don't give a shit, and will act in ways that serve their own best interests. However, sociopaths are capable of loyalty - to people who provide them with things they think they need. It's a sort of learned behavior: you do good things for me, so I'll do what makes you happy to make sure you keep doing those things. It is always self-serving.
I'm not entirely sure how I would define "love" (isn't that the question)...but love for a sociopath is a combination of obsession, intrigue, lust, and respect. Yes, respect...someone who is in a powerful position or who has qualities they desire for themselves. When a sociopath is bored or the illusion of the above disappears, he will move on. And he won't care or lose any sleep over it. It's hardwired, and you can't fix it.
Also, do some reading on "Mirror Neurons." Differences in the mirror neuron system have been suggested (although not proven) as the reason for differences in empathy among people, among other things. It's interesting stuff.
Borderlines are extremely attracted to Narcissists and Sociopaths. If you're a guy who is a Narcissist or Sociopath, Borderline women will FIND you. They will hunt you down. You will be in the store, minding your own business, not bothering anybody, trying to buy deodorant or something, and the Borderline chick cashier will sniff you out. That's just the way it works. They've got a radar for these things.
by SyntheticIs the same true for borderline men and sociopathic women, or did you intentionally draw a distinction?
I would imagine it works the same the other way around. I knew a BPD dude in college and he was obsessed with his ice queen high school girlfriend for like the entire four years of college. Looking back, I think she was a Narc.
From a borderline's distorted perspective, perfectly and thoroughly normal people are perceived as narcs / AsPDs. A good 80% of so-called "narcissists" are just ordinary normal people, the 'narc' bit being only the figment of some borderline's sick imagination.