Sociopath Community

by Thrill Kill

 

by Storm

 Ok, I guess it's different things that turn people on but strangulation has never really aroused me. I am mostly indifferent when I see it in movies.

Movies don't have the same appeal because it's not real. Doing it yourself is a lot different. When you have physical control over someone else it's a lot more appealing.

 

I actually see "this" as something that isn't really part of me. "It" made me fantasize about hurting animals when i was a child. "It" made me get aroused by fantasizing about a killing spree (not so long ago). So this is something I myself have not chosen, and that is one reason not to give in to it.

"It" as in the sexual arousal I assume?

I don't think anyone chooses what their sexually aroused to. You just know whether you are or not when you see something that does it for you.

Unlike you, I've never been sexually aroused when hurting or killing animals. It was really just a means to an end - to shut them up or make them stop doing whatever was annoying me.

No "it" as the thing that made me think about doing things to animals (and worse) when I was a child. Same "thing" that made me fantasize about killing lots of people and also... It's probably also the reason why I'm sometimes aroused by the things I mentioned. I do not really want to admit (or perhaps don't even believe) that it is part of me. It feels kinda like something that comes from the outside. It could seem like I'm crazy, but I'm not. I'm completely rational... I've had this since I was a child but learned to control it.

Yeah, you are right. Still we can condition ourselves to some degree. It wasn't so very long ago that I noticed some of these things which (on occasion) turn me on.

No, I have never been sexually aroused when killing animals. I haven't killed so many animals either. The reasons for doing so were (with pests) to get rid of them, or on some few occasions for fun.

I'm not sure what you mean by "it". Do you you mean your violent thoughts and urges?

I've been having violent thoughts since early childhood and I started experiencing violent urges as a teenager. I've always seen them as just a part of who I am. I was raised in a violent environment though, which likely contributed to it.

by Thrill Kill

 

by Storm

 Ok, I guess it's different things that turn people on but strangulation has never really aroused me. I am mostly indifferent when I see it in movies.

Movies don't have the same appeal because it's not real. Doing it yourself is a lot different. When you have physical control over someone else it's a lot more appealing.

 

I actually see "this" as something that isn't really part of me. "It" made me fantasize about hurting animals when i was a child. "It" made me get aroused by fantasizing about a killing spree (not so long ago). So this is something I myself have not chosen, and that is one reason not to give in to it.

"It" as in the sexual arousal I assume?

I don't think anyone chooses what their sexually aroused to. You just know whether you are or not when you see something that does it for you.

Unlike you, I've never been sexually aroused when hurting or killing animals. It was really just a means to an end - to shut them up or make them stop doing whatever was annoying me.

by Thrill Kill

I'm not sure what you mean by "it". Do you you mean your violent thoughts and urges?

I've been having violent thoughts since early childhood and I started experiencing violent urges as a teenager. I've always seen them as just a part of who I am. I was raised in a violent environment though, which likely contributed to it.

It is hard to explain. I was quite violent as a child/teen and fought with my siblings and destroyed things. That I is probably not unusual and it is not what I mean.

My environment wasn't very violent. I had a good upbringing but like "out of nowhere" these thoughts (or maybe fantasies) about hurting (in a way) animals and younger children, came to me. Of course the fantasies felt good at first but I just didn't want to do it. And I didn't really either... But since then I have had "this" with me all my life. Like...if an animal is aggressive towards me I feel it very strongly. It's like an urge...but I have kept it in the background even though it pops up now and again.

Some years ago I wrote about this and I also wanted to "study" it more. That made "it" stronger and I got that fantasy about killing lots of people. I do not feel like this all the time however, and that is one reason why I consider "it" as not really being part of me. "It" could perhaps be seen as a part of my nature that I keep under leash.

It seems to me like you're not willing to accept "it" as part of yourself because you think it's wrong or bad in some way. You're trying to emotionally distance yourself from it so you don't have to feel that way. Referring to your thoughts and urges as "it" (something separate from yourself) seems like a type of defense mechanism.

by Vicarious

I was going to create a thread about watching violence, but you beat me to it.

 

This may be a sensitive subject to some. In that case just don't answer... But are you turned on or aroused by seeing violence towards people? Do you like to see people who are weak and cannot defend themselves being hurt?

When I watch footage of real violence or tragedy, I am calmed and grounded. I stop fantasizing, my pulse drops, and my mood lightens. I must admit that nothing actually arouses or excites me.

I do not care if the subject of misfortune is a man, woman, child, or animal. I do not view this unlucky creature to as any different than me. I am reminded that, just like me, the universe is cold and indifferent.

 

This has also something to do with how I feel about weapons. All kinds of weapons... Knives, swords, guns, etc. Even nuclear weapons... I'm not sure but I think it's the destructive power in weapons that make me like them so much. It doesn't mean that I will use them on someone (if I don't have to) but to have the ability feels great. So maybe i have some kind of "weapon fetish".

I feel weapons are irrelevant. I do not wish to harm or benefit another living creature. Weapons are objects, just like you, me, the statue of liberty, and my computer.

by Thrill Kill

It seems to me like you're not willing to accept "it" as part of yourself because you think it's wrong or bad in some way. You're trying to emotionally distance yourself from it so you don't have to feel that way. Referring to your thoughts and urges as "it" (something separate from yourself) seems like a type of defense mechanism.

How can it not be bad to enjoy hurting or even killing people and animals? Of course it is bad. I would have no problems killing someone in self-defense or even as revenge for some unforgivable transgression, but that is something else. This is how I usually feel but not always...

It could be that me not really seeing "it" as part of myself, is a kind of defense mechanism. I do however think that there is more to it. I'm also pretty sure that I am not the only one who has experienced it. But it doesn't really matter... Giving in to "it" more than I have done would probably not benefit me in any way. Also this "strategy" (if it is that) works so why should I change anything?

By separating yourself from your urges, you're not really dealing with them. Defense mechanisms don't solve problems, they simply mask them. You clearly have some issues with violence that you're not willing to accept. Maybe if you figured out why you feel the way you do, you may be able to deal with it better.

I personally don't see violence as bad or wrong. There are 7 billion people in the world. As far as I am concerned, people giving birth to three or more kids in an already over-populated world is worse than murder.

by Storm

This may be a sensitive subject to some. In that case just don't answer... But are you turned on or aroused by seeing violence towards people?

This has also something to do with how I feel about weapons. All kinds of weapons... Knives, swords, guns, etc.

Yes.

You're a sadist, pal. You should talk to Wet for Edvard aka Bump aka Red aka a whole list of shitty accounts. A real sicko that one. Go into the BDSM world, you'll find people who'd like to make your fantasies come true.

I will answer everyone later but I take this first. My fantasies or uges, can perhaps be seen as sadistic. Still my sexual experiences have been of the ordinary kind (if group sex etc is ordinary). At least I have never tried BDSM. Also, I tried watching some "sadism porn" on the internet, but it really didn't do anything for me. I thought it was because those women do it voluntarily and aren't really hurt. Also, BDSM is today seen as quite acceptable but... Do sadists fantasize about killing or have urges to kill people? In that case sadists are a lot more dangerous than people in general think.

I dont beleave you are to different than the rest of the people in this world, What stands you apart is your ability to come out and say something about it, you sir are mentaly stronger than most. Dont wory about what other people think. Do what makes you happy, but remember there are repercussions for your actions, as long as you can live with that, you are good