Sociopath Community

Blanc said: 

Aubrieta and Lena, I knew you were going to go for that point next. The fact that I’ve gotten mad and told you to stop talking to ephy or tryp in the past. It’s because neither of them are as responsive in private, or would give me the time of day. I knew I had limited time to talk to them, and I felt like people were getting in the way. 

If the person you're wanting to talk to is pointedly ignoring you and actively talking to someone else, maybe you should take the hint.

There was a particular thing I wanted to discuss with them at the time. I had a perrogative of helping tryp, and I wasn’t able to do that because he wouldn’t talk to me unless in public. 

 If he didn't want to talk to you in private that's your issue, not mine.

Blanc said: 

Turncoat said: 

But that's like what, a decade and a half ago or something? 

It’s in my present too.

From who or what? You can literally tell them to "get with the times" now, and you have gay friends who can help you reinforce this notion instead of being stuck within token pains. 

How many of your gay friends do you think might act weird if they thought you were bisexual? 

Do you have any gay friends, or ever attend any pride parades? The spectrum of coping with past damages is pretty vast, and many have moved on since it's become otherwise largely accepted both legally and culturally. 

Yes I have gay friends and I attend pride parades and other events and organizations etc. 

How do they tend to cope with their orientations compared to you? 

And also being told that I wold grow out of it and it's just a phase, confusion, or misunderstanding. And also that I was sexually "just a late bloomer." 

I've heard every rationalization in the book about my sexuality, it starts to wear on you. 

I'm starting to feel like your connection to attraction itself is blurry and confusing. 

My own connection to my own identity was blurry and confusing and I’m only just starting to make sense of it now in therapy. I’ve divulged on this quite extensively in my journal thread. Obviously sexuality is just a part of identity, and if you don’t even know who you are or you are second guessing it all the time, genuinely. How could you know for certain you were in fact *just* gay. 

My point: Why does the label matter at this point? 

If you're gay you're gay, if you're bi you're bi, why make such a fuss over which you are? Back in the 80s they treated bisexuality as homosexuality, and many bisexuals want it changed back to that so that they feel that much less separated from the community. 

Fuck the labels, if you find yourself into a chick or into a dude, that's where your head's at. 

I'd argue you're more sapiosexual with a basis on how much room they give you to talk and "be yourself". 

But I’m coming to understand myself and my sense of identity is getting much stronger as I sort out and understand why I became so fractured mentally in the area of identity in the first place and the reason I had a desire to pose myself as someone I wasn’t in the first place.

You tend to say the bigger lies when you're either manic or overstimulatingly triggered. It's what's trained people to try to tune it out or otherwise take you as less than genuine. 

It largely looks like it happens when you're not in control, and when it comes to picking up the pieces after the fact you retreat into the guise of faux apathy, insisting that people shouldn't care about what just happened even though your outbursts aren't something worth ignoring. 

It was a protection mechanism. There is an external self and an internal self, and obviously only the internal self is genuine.

I tend to model it as "Needs vs Desires", or "Real vs Construct Selves". 

Needs are inherent in that they remain regardless of the things you want. They are less obvious to the person, but still require feeding and validation for the person to feel fulfilled. 

Desires are external, a construct belief that some think is their real self. Desires are morphic and can change with time, but as long as your desires do not match up with your needs... you can find yourself falling into highly contradictory behaviors that leave you unfulfilled and confused. 

But people see the actions of the external self, without understanding the experiences and feelings of the internal genuine self, and how it reflects on and feels about the actions of the external self. 

They're both important, you can't just ignore causality and the external reality to retreat into yourself, that's selfish. 

It’s taken me a long, long time to fully come to terms with and accept that. There were phases, and as I passed through each one I became more and more certain and more out of the closet with my own self. If that makes sense. 

How do you know that "gay" isn't yet another aim at finding yourself instead of a definite core answer? A lot of it reads as post-rationale. 

"That's not real love" etc... I thought if I could just experience it for myself then maybe I could in fact not be gay. 

But it just didn't work. I can't, do it. 

What has you hitting on the men here more than the women though? 

I don’t, I’ve flirted with women just for some reason people aren’t taking note of it. -.- 

Which women? None are stepping forward to reference it. 

 

Blanc said: 

Turncoat said: 

Blanc said: 

Whorechata said: 

Blanc is bisexual and gets jealous if the males start giving another female more attention than she is receiving. 

The End

 i'm not bisexual, and i care about tryp as a friend. We had a connection and I mistook admiration for attraction. But I'm still fucking gay. 

The End. 

That dude's got you harnessed like a proper yo-yo. He can make you cry in VC and otherwise treat you like trash and you'll always go back to him. 

 If you take out the fucking sexual component you will understand my relationship with him. Stop looking at it is as sex just because I have a vagina and he has a dick this is ridiculous. 

 

I see him as a friend, and I care about him as one. I had my own agenda in trying to help him. You just don’t see it. But that’s why I’ve been fairly consistent in talking with him and being patient with his remarks. Firm, but patient. I make it clear that talking to me in such a way isn’t okay and I’ll never tolerate it. That it should be that way, that he shouldn’t be that way etc. 

 

You don’t see the larger agenda but, I’m helping him realize things. For himself. That will help him get onto a path of recovery. This is why I talk to him, this is why I’m patient. 

 

I know I’m one of the only people that can help him or reach him. I understand why he is the way he is. Why he says the things he says. And I know he doesn’t really mean them. I know who he is beneath the layer of “tough guy” act he puts on a show for everyone. You don’t know but he genuinely has, an underneath self. 

 

And that’s the one that is so sick and needs help. That’s how I look at it, he’s really sick mentally right now and needs the help. You don’t realize how bad the health conditions are either. He genuinely will die from this.

 

I like to help people who seem to be calling out for it. I’ve helped a lot of people here, tryp isn’t the only one. It just goes on behind closed doors so you guys don’t know about it as much. Tryp only likes to talk in public, lately. So that’s why you see all of it. 

 

And I’ve been “there for” and helped countless other people through out my life, IRL that i’ve Known. I’m a really understanding person, and genuinely have the ability to help people make internal transformations and discovery that can lead them on a better path. 

 

Can anyone else here say they got Tryp sober? I did that. I’m trying to save his life.

 LMAO he is literally drunk 24/7 and abuses u every minute of the day. he doesn't even remember half of your convos cos he's wasted u delusional freak. when the fuck did u get him sober? also the one thing he coulda used from u was the 3k that YOU SHUTDOWN. so how the fuck are u helping him?

Blanc said: 

Turncoat said: 

Blanc said: 

Whorechata said: 

Blanc is bisexual and gets jealous if the males start giving another female more attention than she is receiving. 

The End

 i'm not bisexual, and i care about tryp as a friend. We had a connection and I mistook admiration for attraction. But I'm still fucking gay. 

The End. 

That dude's got you harnessed like a proper yo-yo. He can make you cry in VC and otherwise treat you like trash and you'll always go back to him. 

 If you take out the fucking sexual component you will understand my relationship with him. Stop looking at it is as sex just because I have a vagina and he has a dick this is ridiculous. 

I made no mention of his dick in this post, just your relationship with him. 

I see him as a friend, and I care about him as one. I had my own agenda in trying to help him. You just don’t see it. But that’s why I’ve been fairly consistent in talking with him and being patient with his remarks. Firm, but patient. I make it clear that talking to me in such a way isn’t okay and I’ll never tolerate it. That it should be that way, that he shouldn’t be that way etc. 

You don’t see the larger agenda but, I’m helping him realize things. For himself. That will help him get onto a path of recovery. This is why I talk to him, this is why I’m patient. 

He's just going to hurt you again, like every other time you defaulted to this mindset. You're projecting your own feeling the need for help onto him likely for the feeling of understanding and reciprocation, and that's likely how you became attracted to him in the first place. 

You more likely have been sucked back into enjoying his brand of supply, but we'll see where this goes I guess. His railing on you isn't even that far back. 

I know I’m one of the only people that can help him or reach him. I understand why he is the way he is. Why he says the things he says. And I know he doesn’t really mean them. I know who he is beneath the layer of “tough guy” act he puts on a show for everyone. You don’t know but he genuinely has, an underneath self. 

And that’s the one that is so sick and needs help. That’s how I look at it, he’s really sick mentally right now and needs the help. You don’t realize how bad the health conditions are either. He genuinely will die from this.

I like to help people who seem to be calling out for it. I’ve helped a lot of people here, tryp isn’t the only one. It just goes on behind closed doors so you guys don’t know about it as much. Tryp only likes to talk in public, lately. So that’s why you see all of it. 

And I’ve been “there for” and helped countless other people through out my life, IRL that i’ve Known. I’m a really understanding person, and genuinely have the ability to help people make internal transformations and discovery that can lead them on a better path. 

Can anyone else here say they got Tryp sober? I did that. I’m trying to save his life. 

You have to be really patient with these sort of things. People often have a large level of resistance to the person who is helping them the most as well. I’m used to this pattern. All this proves to me is that I have gotten under their skin. Which is precisely what I was going for.

I see what you're trying to say, but I think it's a justification for falling back into the same traps you keep finding yourself in. 

You just... keep forgetting the past when it's not far enough back. 

aubrieta said:

 in my opinion, yes. it is summarizing everything up into examples that are provable. chapo has backed me up about our meetup story, and gumptamine and blanc have both admitted sexual acts went on between the 2 of them, possibly actual sexual intercourse

who else has blanc met up with from sc? who else have i met up with? i think these 2 experiences sums up both of our true sexual orientations perfectly

I liked peach, Chet, Dee, even sugar. I flirted with alena once but she’s not into me. Me and Chet had a thing but then she ran off with some dude. It happens. I really liked peach but, at a certain point I had to suck it up and be respectful of her very real relationship with Alice. Dee is flighty, she flirts with me on and off but, had she been more consistent I would of been more persuaded to pursue her more avidly but, then she got a boyfriend and wouldn’t stop talking about him. Sugar also has a boyfriend, but I think her voice is really hot. I don’t know what she looks like. Oh and I liked angee too but, once again she was just really flakey, she flirted with me on and off but when I tried to talk to her one on one she just wasn’t that dedicated. 

Me and tryp never had sex just to clarify. 

But, I have had relationships with girls IRL that you don’t see because they’re not on here. So this point invalidates itself with the reality of the fact, I’ve had more sex with women than men. On more occasions. 

Also I’ve only ever gotten off to women, it’s not physically possible for me to enjoy, the thought of men or, being with them. It’s never, not once happened. So, hm. I wonder what that’s called. 

Oh that’s right. Gay. I’ve only ever consistently gotten off to women. My entire life. My ENTIRE life. Do the math dude.

"Aubrieta and Lena, I knew you were going to go for that point next. The fact that I’ve gotten mad and told you to stop talking to ephy or tryp in the past. It’s because neither of them are as responsive in private, or would give me the time of day. I knew I had limited time to talk to them, and I felt like people were getting in the way."

translation: it's because i knew they weren't gonna talk to me, esp if cuter girls were present so i got mad like a jealous hater bitch that i am

Turncoat said: 

aubrieta said: 

and TC if we are going by yours, it would be Crow so, thats provable, and by those measures youre straight, but ive seen you flirt with both sexes. what would you say your sexual identity/orientation is TC?

Heteroflexible going on Homoflexible. 

Still in the body of a man, so I'm technically less homosexual than I could be. 

---

I have seen Blanc talk at length about female body parts, but she doesn't seem to flirt at women as readily on here. 

I just figured she found them too intimidating. 

Whorechata said: 

Turncoat said: 

aubrieta said: 

and TC if we are going by yours, it would be Crow so, thats provable, and by those measures youre straight, but ive seen you flirt with both sexes. what would you say your sexual identity/orientation is TC?

Heteroflexible going on Homoflexible. 

Still in the body of a man, so I'm technically less homosexual than I could be. 

---

I have seen Blanc talk at length about female body parts, but she doesn't seem to flirt at women as readily on here. 

I just figured she found them too intimidating. 

 The women here softcrush sugared peach drops, what do you mean intimidating

I don’t find them intimidating they’re just not that interested in me, but I’ve had girlfriends outside of here... -.- 

Blanc said: 

Turncoat said: 

aubrieta said: 

and TC if we are going by yours, it would be Crow so, thats provable, and by those measures youre straight, but ive seen you flirt with both sexes. what would you say your sexual identity/orientation is TC?

Heteroflexible going on Homoflexible. 

Still in the body of a man, so I'm technically less homosexual than I could be. 

---

I have seen Blanc talk at length about female body parts, but she doesn't seem to flirt at women as readily on here. 

I just figured she found them too intimidating. 

Whorechata said: 

Turncoat said: 

aubrieta said: 

and TC if we are going by yours, it would be Crow so, thats provable, and by those measures youre straight, but ive seen you flirt with both sexes. what would you say your sexual identity/orientation is TC?

Heteroflexible going on Homoflexible. 

Still in the body of a man, so I'm technically less homosexual than I could be. 

---

I have seen Blanc talk at length about female body parts, but she doesn't seem to flirt at women as readily on here. 

I just figured she found them too intimidating. 

 The women here softcrush sugared peach drops, what do you mean intimidating

I don’t find them intimidating they’re just not that interested in me, but I’ve had girlfriends outside of here... -.- 

Who would you be hitting on if you thought you had a chance with them? 

Turncoat said: 

Whorechata said: 

Turncoat said: 

aubrieta said: 

and TC if we are going by yours, it would be Crow so, thats provable, and by those measures youre straight, but ive seen you flirt with both sexes. what would you say your sexual identity/orientation is TC?

Heteroflexible going on Homoflexible. 

Still in the body of a man, so I'm technically less homosexual than I could be. 

---

I have seen Blanc talk at length about female body parts, but she doesn't seem to flirt at women as readily on here. 

I just figured she found them too intimidating. 

 The women here softcrush sugared peach drops, what do you mean intimidating

It's Blanc, she probably finds more genuine attraction scarier, based on her narratives. 

 I don’t find genuine attraction scary.

Blanc said: 

Turncoat said: 

Whorechata said: 

Turncoat said: 

aubrieta said: 

and TC if we are going by yours, it would be Crow so, thats provable, and by those measures youre straight, but ive seen you flirt with both sexes. what would you say your sexual identity/orientation is TC?

Heteroflexible going on Homoflexible. 

Still in the body of a man, so I'm technically less homosexual than I could be. 

---

I have seen Blanc talk at length about female body parts, but she doesn't seem to flirt at women as readily on here. 

I just figured she found them too intimidating. 

 The women here softcrush sugared peach drops, what do you mean intimidating

It's Blanc, she probably finds more genuine attraction scarier, based on her narratives. 

 I don’t find genuine attraction scary.

You have such a thing about rejection though, and you aim for people of the gender you're not even attracted to.