Sociopath Community

So much pain 

Blanc said: 

Hi i just had a mild anxiety attack lol 

 

To explain. I dont know if i even can with words... 

 

i realized who i am and that I’ve been isn’t myself but just a thing to cover up myself so that i dont have to experience various, pains and discomforts of different sorts.

 

And it was so uncomfortable to have myself resurface like that i just had an anxiety attack feeling exposed 

Blanc said: 

dam i miss the beach like a motherfucker rn 

Easier to mentally veg out with all that sun and ocean sound? 

Turncoat said: 

Blanc said: 

dam i miss the beach like a motherfucker rn 

Easier to mentally veg out with all that sun and ocean sound? 

----

---- 

Blanc said: 

Turncoat said: 

Blanc said: 

dam i miss the beach like a motherfucker rn 

Easier to mentally veg out with all that sun and ocean sound? 

 

Reminds me of when Dexter used to link the same videos at everyone. 

AliceInWonderland said: 

So much pain 

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qv96yJYhk3M 

I hate to admit it but i was losing my shit a little bit today, can’t tell if i just drank too much coffee or am having a hypo-manic episode but 

it’s not fun. Or perhaps a reaction to stress/anxiety. I dunno, seems kinda hypo-manic to me

Feeling much calmer today than i was yesterday holy shit 

don’t know what the fuck was wrong with me but def seemed a little hypo-manic. I think i forgot to take my meds :/ 

(maybe) 

i have a system thats supposed to help me not do that and also be able to see if i did do that but.... i fucked up by getting to assured in myself like “oh I’ll never forget who am i kidding I’ve been taking it 3 fucking years its such a habit blah blah blah” 

you’re an idiot. Keep, with the goddamn system. You ding bat. 

Anyway, the way i felt yesterday was not pleasant so... yeah it was like a very heightened state of anxiety and feeling like nothing mattered at the same time, and then racing thoughts, and having lots of “realizations” ...... 

yeah. 

Anyways lol.... back to regularly scheduled programming hopefully and being mentally stable?? 

Please? 

I know how this goes though and usually after an up swing follows a down swing so it’s only a matter of time before I want to kill myself. Cheers. 

*sips coffee* 

- 

i woke up at 9 this morning, not too bad. Considering other days it was like later in the afternoon lol. And uh, made my coffee, let the dogs out. 

I guess I can keep working on my bedroom project as something to do. 

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/37i9dQZF1DX9OZisIoJQhG?si=GqOr_b9dQRS2AILN1Mi1GQ 

Been listening to this. 

Last night i made some art.