Edvard stated: source post
For Cain, that message he can see from how much he's kicking back right now, but when given to someone who is actively trying and failing? Being told to "look harder" can actually make them feel like more of a failure.
Someone who is trying and "failing" is still actively doing something. The failures make them gain experience, and after each failure they are better off as a person and closer to his/her goal for having that experience compared to not having had that experience. The biggest danger would be to let his/her self esteem plummet, and in those circumstances good company and support from others can be very important.
One of the biggest obstacles these days is even getting your foot in the door. So much is done online now, making it become a factor of luck, timing, and what credentials can be read by a machine when singling you out for the next potential candidate. From that, it is possible to fail with little to no actual experience gained from it, and from there self esteem only has so many options typically.
You benefit more these days from what you are more than how hard you're trying. If I'd become a nurse instead, or planned on doing restaurant work for the rest of my life, I'd be set, but that's not what I want.
How often do you wager that their depression comes from circumstance instead of organic or other reasons? It's probably the majority these days, but I don't have the split of numbers on-hand.
I think in 100% of the cases it is a mix of both. They are both changeable imo. The environment more easily than the inner brain chemistry though.
I don't know, I've seen people too depressed to even motivate getting out of bed or moving their limbs. Their brain is practically dead weighting the rest of them. Environment can change if you have the means to, but brain chemistry's a mess. Even if they're planted into a situation of success from good connections and opportunities falling onto their laps, they tend to not actually want anything. Even if they get what they want, they're more likely to find that they don't want it anymore once they have it from it not providing the same happiness that they imagined.
How do you make such people want something? They need to want to proceed, and they can physically be unable to fathom want if it's extreme enough.
Honestly, I've lost most of my muses, and as I get older more and more of them seem to fade. It's hard to be motivated to do things when slim to none of it add up to anything meaningful. Barely anything really stimulates me now, so it's hard to find motivation when the reward isn't always worth the price. At least with a relationship I can do things and watch them enjoy themselves, parasiting off the sliver of their release that I can enjoy as if it were my own. I cannot enjoy myself too well these days, but I can vicariously enjoy another who has it better off than I do, being happy for their happiness instead of my own that's so hard to please now.
I feel old and tired despite being so young, and I need others to leech off of to feel anything for myself other than fear and depression. It's hard to motivate myself when the carrot at the end of my stick is so moldy and stale, but I've found that other people's carrots still look tasty enough to share.
When was the carrot fresh for you Turn? What made you happy in the past? Do you think it's worth trying to put life back into the carrot? I mean, everyone wants happiness.
Happiness was always hard to find even as a kid, but most things that did make me happy are fading in potency if it's not already gone.
Like I said, the carrot is moldy, poisonous even, but other people who still have zeal and life have perfectly fine carrots for me to enjoy if I can help tend to their gardens in lieu of my own hopeless salt and soil. I've accepted that happiness isn't really a common thing for me, so I've settled with comfort being the goal. Comfort can remain even if happiness fades.
You studied acting, right? Is there anything involving that that you'd like? Did you become good at controlling your face/body/voice, did you take pride in your acting abilities at any point?
I did enjoy that, but it was always more of an elective thing. I don't see that being where I'll succeed unless it's analysis. It's even more competitive than where I'm trying to succeed now.
You know a lot about comic verse, both comics and movies.
For what I know about comics I'm actually quite uninformed by comparison. How am I supposed to compete against the currently successful charismatic(ish) autists out there when the strongest point for it is trivia? A lot of what I know now's from a friend who's worse about things like TVTropes than I am, where I was conversationally the wall for his conversational game of solo tennis. There'd need to be a hook that hasn't been done before, and there'd need to be something that'd help hoist it above the current influx of others trying the exact same thing.
You are also good with words, with research, analysis/critic, organizing.
I'm a scatterbrain that uses the internet to fill in the half-thoughts I'm full of. I use references as a way of fumbling less, or as humor once I've already thought of a tangent that barely applies. In many cases a reference gets closer to home than my tangled mess of a visually-themed sentence appears without it.
My research is honestly sub-par, and my organizing is needed to make myself appear at least somewhat legible. I could help someone else be better, but by myself I'm a lot of part-way-there's. Analysis/Critique is all I've really got, and everyone and their mother does that shit on the internet these days.
Your summaries of Mee's days in Turkey were hilarious. Become a writer/editor of some comic-related news media?
Stuff like that and summarizing Luna's pieces work from me bouncing off of someone else. I'm pretty much designed to be a team player or a mirror that reflects someone else's shine.
There are jobs where your skills can be put to good use Turncoat and you can enjoy what you are doing too. Are you sure you've looked into all of them?
Obviously rhetorical, as there's no way for me to see all of them.
I've been looking for a while while doing shit work in the meantime. It's looking like if I expect anything to happen that I'll likely need to go back to school and turn my psych minor into something more.
I think you have a mind that is different from most people's and there is a sense of loneliness and disconnect coming from there. You are obviously above average intelligence so that alone can depress and under stimulate someone. But this world is huge and there are more like-minded people out there, and most importantly, people looking for people like you out there.
For every talent I have, especially with the internet now, there's people already in place that do what I do twenty times better. Everyone thinks they can be the next internet critic or article writer, and the sheer volume of it makes those that succeed overshadow the masses that much harder while the masses themselves turn it into a matter of luck-through-oversaturation. Seriously, you can't walk through youtube without encountering multiple channels worth of critics all going at the same topic at once.
I know it's a lot of "IT'S HOPELESSSSSS!" sounding-rants, but this is pretty much where I've been steered after trying for this long. It's hard to carry the same zeal as "The Little Engine That Could" when the story spans a dictionary's length instead of a children's book's, but there's always that part of me that hopes I'll be laughing with how hopeless it once looked as opposed to at how hopeless it continues to, so for that I keep trying.
