blanc stated: source post
The loneliness of having no family is one that is so painful even the slightest reminder burns. Your cheeks become hot from the feeling, you start to sweat, and your throat is clasped shut from the ache.
Pain and detachment have become so familiar that I have taken a sick liking for it. It is the only thing I have left that can fill the emptiness.
Tell me why I should suffer. It is because in life and death there is no justice. And even though I didn't deserve it, all of it still happened. And even though I worked my hardest to overcome, the task is easier said than done. You think it would be something you could just put out of your mind, but it eats you alive. It has you from every angle. It grows roots in the deepest most secret crevices of your mind. You are never safe. They say you're not alone, but you are. And the voice that says you can't do this used to whisper but now it screams. Inside you there is someone scratching at your ribs- pulling at your seems. You are a tea kettle billowing with steam. You are sick of blank stares, and holding back your tears like a rock in a sling shot. You're sick of waking up. You're sick of trying.
Sorry for posting this but I need to acknowledge that this is how I feel. Regardless of how stupid it is. Also after posting this I go back to being numb, the pain that I talked about in the beginning went away. Which I say is a good thing. Even though numb isn't much better.
Blanc why are you trolling me on your alt account evermoral?