Sociopath Community

You know, I'm surprisingly bad at this for a con artist.

I think a part of you wants to connect with other people, but it's difficult when you look at them and wonder why the fuck they don't see what you see.

And I'm guessing you've gotten pretty close to the bottom of the conceptual rabbit-hole, where the very nature of things begins to flicker like a hologram and all you can do is laugh at the idea that you might fall through a seam in the fabric of reality.

And if you're anything like me, that meditation has the potential to discompose you in a way that's not quite depression - not quite ennui - not quite an existential crisis. It's just absurd. And you laugh, because you have to laugh, because what the fuck else can you do?

I keep finding asexuality to be defined with an "or". It's either the lack of desire for sex itself or the lack of association connected with it. If she's closer to the latter, the body could still be desiring the sensations themselves while not attaching it to anything in particular, somewhat like how someone'd be with a paraphilia of something that is simultaneously unknown to the person and does not exist. 

It's a lust for nothing. 

Damnnnnnnn!!! This is great Ed. It is on spot. Ed voicing like a boss...

I'm a hopeless romantic... :c LOL

Sorry I just recently discovered how to add gifs... 

I'm glad to hear that, my main issue with you was that you wouldn't admit to your faults, not that you had them.I don't think you premeditated or even meant to do half of the incidents I brought up, they all genuinely seem to be heat of the moment choices gone bad, but you always had excuses until now.

I'm no better, Ive had my hothead moments, my emotional outbursts that have pushed me to lash out at people. Which is why I couldn't compare which of us is the most trustworthy out of the two, how could I while I've been and am still susceptible to the same flaw. The only real difference between us in that matter is that im quicker to admit fault and even this is mainly to do with me being a chronic self blamer. 

You asked me before how I could be friends with someone like Jason but critique you. When I look at someone, I don't judge on what their faults are, but how they perceive them . You gained points in my book for that.

Lady Isabel Carlyle stated: source post

 

TheCrowOnTheFence stated: source post

 I didn't play the ''be someone's voice'' game with you?

Oh! Oh... Play with me? :D

 I am a con artist.  A brilliant con artist.  My greatest asset is my ability to appear to people as I want to appear.  To know what they want to hear before they know they want to hear it.  I am a genius.  I can talk circles around anyone because I can think circles around anyone.  And yet, in moments that I can't identify between lucidity or insecurity, I wonder if I'm conning myself.  Am I as intelligent as I believe I am?  Am I as unique?  As ruthless?  As interesting?  Or have I simply convinced myself of that through my own ability to spin webs of pretty words?  But those moments pass, and I carry on playing the game.

Some time ago I learned that honesty is the greatest lie, and I continue to live by it.  If I say the truth (or in some cases nothing at all) in just such a way, it becomes what I want, instead of what it is.  And if anyone cares to scrutinize far enough, I have the best defense possible.  That my lie is in fact true.

I am special, but not for the reasons you think.  Interesting things have happened to me and I have done interesting things, but all have left me surprisingly unchanged.  Bored, even.  And so I use these experiences in my social arsenal, but continue to look for something that will impress me the way it impresses others.

I used to grapple with my own contradictions.  I am special and at the same time, I am nothing.  I am superior to others and at the same time, I seek their adoration and respect.  I am honest and I am a liar.  But now I'm older.  Some days it seems like maturity, others it seems like simply being tired.  I no longer grapple with these things.  At least not with the passionate curiosity that I used to.   Part of me rationalizes these weaknesses to myself and part of me simply no longer cares.  I am what I am.

I feel vapid.  Like there is no real person under the construct I've created.  I've searched and I've found little.  Only further constructs.  This formed identity serves me well, but answers no questions and leaves no fulfillment.  I seek hedonistic pleasures and simple gratifications, because what else can I do?  There is no purpose to life and there is no truer meaning behind my mask.  All we have in this world is fancy and whim.  And I will pursue it with an air of panache, until my limited time is up.

I don't know who I am.  But at least I know I'm good company, if nothing else.

So as much as I know that I have two more to do (and two hate sex stories... even though I'm awful at that style of writing), there's still those I'd be intrigued to see do mine: 

Alterego, for she's been paying more attention to different more targeted aspects of me as opposed to the general more publicly gatherable presentation and has been doing so for a very long time, and as I requested earlier in this thread, Spatial Mind, even though I figure he's been ignoring this topic, since he and I have had a rather interesting set of interactions since the start that I can't really say are like any of the others here. 

Yep.  I can attest to familiarity of the latter scenario.

haart stated: source post

No problem, esse. I actually just stole your own words from a few months ago.

I can't figure you out at all :P

I think you know that I know you know that I know...  It's an educated guess, which is, of course, fine.  I appreciate that you took the time.  It can be a good gauge of how one is perceived and from what information this perception arises.

Since you're a smarty pants, I won't condescend by giving any tl;dr exposition that neither one of us would be edified by.

double post

As Jim and Berk don't appear to be up to the task, I'll pass it on to others.  Since I expect most to ignore the request, I'll make a list in the hopes of getting one or two. : )

Haart

Spatial Mind

Sugar

Edvard

Buttered Toast

Angee

Wooster