I'm not Her, either. :)
Not sure if I will answer all your questions...
"No better friend, no worse enemy." It has been a family motto long before I heard the words spoken by General Mattis.
I don't look for friends. There is this bunch of guys I have been through some intense shit with that I know will come to my aid 20 years from now if I need them. And I would leave tomorrow to travel through hell with gasoline soaked shorts to get those fuckers if they needed me. Not all of these people are the most positive sort and some a down right blight on society... but I love them for what we did and what we endured together.
What I look for now are positive inspirations that I can return motivation and enjoy myself as well as the person I choose to be with at that time.