Yes and no. Those few essential relations (bloodline & romantic) one has in person, no matter what - simple as that.
As for the rest - we live in increasingly polarised times, not under the old olive tree in the village square playing a round of backgammon anymore. Impersonal, faceless, nameless yet heartfelt re/cognition is where the conversation gets going.
ImNotHer stated: source post
Do you seek out friendships?
They just tend to happen from talking to people. It's a matter of if we click or not more than anything.
What needs do these bonds fulfill?
Entertainment and study. People are my crossword puzzles, my game of sudoku, my routine rubix cube. They are also a helpful resource.
I also feel less lonely with others around. I feel pretty much nothing but self loathing and boredom when I avoid people for too long, while others being around distracts from that. It's fun to see how people respond to things.
Friends also can give me reasons to try new things and offer me information I haven't found on my own. They tend to make me more knowledgeable in a well rounded way while I provide the same service back. I have more room to grow with others than alone.
I enjoy collecting stories too. While people are an easy resource for those, friends provide much more depth and subtext. An aquaintence's misconceptions about themselves tend to be less obvious than a friend's.
So much about me centers around people, and friends grant more for my interests than others typically would. Friendship is the best muse for theater and psychology.
Do you consider yourself a good friend to have?
I'm just me. What I am to people tends to depend more on what they're after. I tend to mesh better with crazier people for some reason.
Are there friends you lost that you wish you had back?
Many. When they leave too soon it's like putting down a novel unfinished.
I also am aversive towards change. Them leaving has a way of breaking comfortable routines.
What would a friend have to do to you that would make you end the friendship?
Things like stealing from me don't sit well with me, nor would abusing my pets, breaking stuff, breaking my trust, things that are generally rude and disruptive to that sort of degree.
I think all my life, friendship connections... I wanted to want them, more than I had what it took to make them happen. I can appreciate them in fantasy life, but I can't touch them in the real.
I love to see other people in close bonds and even envy it. But something is missing in me. When the opportunity presents itself it doesn't feel the way movies of close friendships make me feel. It only ends up feeling like a chore and an intrusion.
Those people I keep in touch with are the bonfires of personality. They are able to burn at the edges of my inner world making it harder for them to evaporate into thin air. I have a longing to match the real with the fantasy, but I know now that my brain doesn't work like that.
I think I make a good friend if you wait long enough for me attach. That takes a few years, sometimes longer though, and everyone's in too much of a hurry.
On a small scale, yeah. I need things to have a certain level of routine to keep myself more stable. I however recognize that what I need isn't for everybody, so beyond the small scale that changes. Everyone is entitled to their own personal safety bubble.
It's nice to have that as a crutch when I am rebuilding myself.