13:41 - mikeangel: don't feel sorry for them, they wouldn't be alive if we weren't performing trials on them
by White Oleander"Was that satisfying?"
"Yes."
"I don't know why I am so compelled by to feed this combative, aggressive streak by tearing people down."
"I do. Your sadism is a manifestation of a deeply rooted desire to hurt your father- over and over and over again..."
Don't you have your husband for that too? :D
by EdvardYou're sadistic in bed too, aren't you. It must be kinda awkward if he thinks your sadism is related to your father.
Why? Do your commitment issues and desire for a woman to take control in bed- which likely stem from a deeply rooted, insecure attachment to your mother- make all your interactions with women "awkward"? A deeply rooted psychological motivation or mechanism is unconscious.
Perhaps if you didn't have these commitment issues, you would understand that after over a decade, sexual awkwardness is not something we struggle with. We've perfected what you've only had the chance to explore superficially, in your numerous superficial relationships. :)
by White Oleander
by EdvardYou're sadistic in bed too, aren't you. It must be kinda awkward if he thinks your sadism is related to your father.
Why? Do your commitment issues and desire for a woman to take control in bed- which likely stem from a deeply rooted, insecure attachment to your mother- make all your interactions with women "awkward"? A deeply rooted psychological motivation or mechanism is unconscious.
Perhaps if you didn't have these commitment issues, you would understand that after over a decade, sexual awkwardness is not something we struggle with. We've perfected what you've only had the chance to explore superficially, in your numerous superficial relationships. :)
Whoa, look at alter pull out those sharp claws faster than wolverine!
You got that ammo you used against me from casual one-time mentions I made on the old forum months ago. Nice to see you paid so much attention. I've never been attracted to hardcore bdsm and gore sex fantasies like you, we can't really compare our issues here, but nice try. :D
I know a lot of men who have no problem with their partners daddy issues. It's just that knowing you as a strong and independent woman and a bit about your husband from what you told us, I thought that realization might be a bit awkward for you two. I for one wouldn't want to be the substitute for a woman's father, or a substitute for anyone, when I'm with that woman. The daddy stuff turns me off. I'm fine with being wrong about you two. Just tell me I'm wrong without getting this defensive next time :D
by Piles the Beaver
Anyone who is happily married, and proud to be married, wouldn't feel the need to belittle another for their choice of lifestyles. Just because you happened to shack up with someone who puts up with you doesn't mean that the single man or woman who is rummaging through interactions is lesser of a person. Get off your pedestal woman. It is only standing from delusions anyway. In reality you are on the same level as everyone else.
It wasn't really my intention to belittle Ed's lifestyle (ok, maybe just to take a little poke) - but to undermine his erroneous assumptions. As Ana elucidated, pathologies stemming from dysfunctional parenting tend to spill into many areas of a person's life. They are frequently unconscious.
Ed, I'll sheath my claws and give you a proper explanation. I think you misunderstand me. The kind of role-playing you assumed I was into turns me right off, and I've never liked gore. (I am very particular, and while sexualized violence is somewhat of a fetish for me, I like things... clean.)
My marriage is good, but my husband always calling me on my shit = our fighting a great deal. He knocks me off my pedestal frequently, and is better at doing so than anyone I have ever known. I actually love him for it. I need someone to challenge me. :p
At any rate, marriage definitely isn't for everyone, but what I said to Ed is technically true. When you know a person very well, and you are as experimental as we are... The sex gets better and better. It just does. Maybe one can reach those heights with occasional partners, but in my own personal experience, there is no comparison- especially with regard to s/m, and edgeplay in particular- where an intimate knowledge of one's partner really serves to enhance the act, because of the mutual trust required. Awkwardness is so far removed from our equation at this point, given our history, that this assertion struck me as ridiculous, and born of inexperience.
You know, I was dealing with an insufferable married couple who's snobbery about being married rubbed me the wrong way one too many times. And it wasn't from a jealousy like all of "you" maried snobs seem to think, it was from the contempt I had for their weaknesses that they are trying to play off as strengths. Anyone who is happily married, and proud to be married, wouldn't feel the need to belittle another for their choice of lifestyles. Just because you happened to shack up with someone who puts up with you doesn't mean that the single man or woman who is rummaging through interactions is lesser of a person. Get off your pedestal woman. It is only standing from delusions anyway. In reality you are on the same level as everyone else.