Closer to forcing myself to become stronger about it. I knew if others knew, it'd become that much harder to just black it out. I forced myself to face it even though it robbed me of sleep and sanity to do so. I knew I needed to overcome it to not be a broken mess for the rest of my life.
It's why I bother to write ex-PTSD, even if that turns out to be bullshit. The flashbacks and nightmares stopped, and I systematically desensitized myself to the triggers (like the smell of clay for example) so that I could function. If anything, I'm just more jaded now than I was, which says something since I was pretty fucking jaded beforehand.
Have you ever tried to verbally turn down her advances, before she escalated to physical assault? Like, telling her in no uncertain terms that you don't want to do anything with her / you're repulsed by the sight / body odour / general presence of her? (Preferably in the company of other people.)
Oh there was plenty of "No", descriptive No's were less common but they were there. A few times I swear it pushed her to go harder, if not to go again. When she'd rush my room I'd go into my bathroom and lock the door, but she saw it like a game or something.
She tried to win me over by conventional means our first year there, but I had no interest whatsoever and I let her know that every time she insisted. After a point, not wanting it no longer mattered to her, since to her an erection was consent, and she knew if I couldn't be convinced, it could be.
What a fucking mess. I'd have definitely taken the violent route with some of those people. But I admit it's not always the smartest route, and certainly not in everyone's temper.
I also think, in the end, you had to be stronger than most to get over this and talk so openly/clear headed about it.
by TurncoatShe loved to talk about how she could bend law around her finger, which sounds ridiculous until she actually would reference some of it and give examples of how people respond to things. "Jury of your peers" after all. She even knew how to cry on command, a tactic she used to re-infiltrate the group over and over.
A lot of it has to do with this:
She was so pathetic that people trusted her out of pity.
She made ugly into a tool of control.
Because everyone thought she was such shit she was sincere
That's one of the (many) pitfalls of 'affective empathy'. Many people (from peer-groups to court-rooms) have this mentality: "Poor bugger is already ugly / fat / pitiful enough, why not let her have it her way - it's only fair" - without giving a second thought to it.
Most stomach-turning mentality if you ask me.
by TurncoatIt's interesting how her height plays a factor into the appearance of it. By being smaller than him, it makes it seem more comedic when she's the abuser, while more of a victim when the target. She was even able to go to a further escalation than he did.
Also the appearance of the anger. She looked like she'd fuck someone up if they questioned her.
He does fit into the "beta" category of modern men because of this. I don't think anyone wants to fight an enraged woman. But if it were me, I would have at least come up to them to see what's going on. They are disturbing my peace.
by Miss DiagnosedWell my oh my, what a strange little tale of woe. Why you hanging out with fat chicks, in the first place, honey? And why didn't you just slap that fat bitch or throw a chocolate bar down the hall and lock the door with a proper lock, you know one she can't pick? That's not too tough, baby boy. ;)
And my goodness, ain't it interesting how this weak man gets all these sweet feels while y'all gang pile lady members about being raped by their momma's BFs when they were little girls. Tsk, tsk, tsk tough little crowd.
This doesn't sound like a sociopath community, its more like a little geek sorority house 'round here.
I am 80% certain he is not looking for pity.
I said it while expecting to be mocked for it for the sake of those who were interested beyond looking for ammo, and expected it further once I saw the (incomplete) transcript became a topic. The lack of it is surprising.
I must be likable or something~
"And why didn't you just slap that fat bitch or throw a chocolate bar down the hall and lock the door with a proper lock, you know one she can't pick?"
I'm willing to bet rape was tastier to her than chocolate. 
Also, first portion was in a dorm setting while the other was a townhouse she happened to live in. The former meant I couldn't modify anything while the latter meant she could complain about people fucking with her home's locks (meant a fine and them fixing it almost immediately, since they like knowing they can get in themselves). If you mean related to my own room, it was a really shitty door.
One of those wrenches who won't take 'No' for an answer - well that's very much an understatement.
I understand you didn't want to go to police / court / whatever with it, but are you aware how close you were to landing in hot water? The ogre could've gone to report you for rape, you've no idea how many rejects are doing that. And a lot of them pull it off successfully. It's an issue so heavily under-represented in the press/media that it's almost a taboo.
She'd have turned it around on me like that if I went to the courts at all. She loved to talk about how she could bend law around her finger, which sounds ridiculous until she actually would reference some of it and give examples of how people respond to things. "Jury of your peers" after all. She even knew how to cry on command, a tactic she used to re-infiltrate the group over and over.
Ugly and delusional does not mean stupid, unfortunately.