amen!!
so you're vulnerable, so what? everybody's got vulnerabilities, it's ok, just make sure to stay away from people who will take advantage of them. and do yourself a favor, acknowledge your vulnerabilities and own them, work on them, be good to yourself. it's ok!
honey, you don't want this idiot back, he will never be who you want him to be. don't worry about him changing, cut your losses and move on, you need to change, regain your sense of self, self-respect and worth. if you want to win, focus on yourself, win by living a good, happy, healthy life. fuck this misery you've been through, life is short, enjoy it! a little bit of hedonism never hurt anybody! ;)
go on a trip! spend time with good nurturing people. learn something new. read some good books. reinvent yourself. tap into your talents and potential. man... so much good stuff in this world! you could have the gold, stop focusing on the shit. ;)
how about this, book a trip to central america or the caribbean, stay in a surf camp and just enjoy! learn to surf (if you don't know how to), hang out, eat well, meet some hot men, have a blast! get out of this box you put yourself in! it is so much better outside!!! come out and play!! ;)
he wants to make you like him, and from the looks of it, hes already gotten it.
The best thing you can do is walk away, disconnect and move on... because if hes anything like me, he will continue to eat away at you, infect your very psyche and drain you... if he gets that... he wins... every time... regardless of the emotion you ellicit, its a power struggle, and by playing his game, you feed him power. if you dont feed him... he fades away... or at least, finds another target to focus on.
this is not a battle you win, it is one you lose... the best outcome for you is to stop playing a rigged game...
Daddy, I read your comments and so often think - this dude is a voice of reason! But then you say something at the end and it makes me shiver! hahahaha!
I have a healthy fear of you and I hope to never cross your path. :) I mean and say this with outmost respect. :) For meeting people like you one needs an autodestruct button. ;)