Sociopath Community

Tryptamine said: 

Aizenonimo said: 

Tryptamine said: 

Aizenonimo said: 

How do you manage to value love above your own ego? It seems incomprehensible to me 

Giving a serious answer to this, I do a fair amount of research into mental health.

Usually BPD revolves around a fear of rejection. The person will pick up subtle cues of rejection from things they've already experienced, and they try to block it out or wall themselves off instantly. Turns out that the prognosis for BPD is actually not bad, and that about 2 years of having a trusting relationship with someone cures most of the symptoms.

I don't think BPD people value love above their ego, I think that they want love but protect their ego.

 BPD or not humans are humans, and humans need an ego just to survive that's no wonder.

But you say that fear of rejection is what hurts them the most, but who likes being rejected or who likes getting cucked?
Does it matter if it is bpd/npd/aspd, because you may say whatever but I never met an aspd-npd who was fine with being rejected in any shape or form.

And they do value love about their ego, deep inside all of them reek of "i just want to be loved" and everything else is just a shield to cover up that fragility.

The cucking fetish has its own rules and psychology.

Also I would think AsPD people would be alright with rejection, but it depends on the person, of course. It's easier to see why narcs might get upset.

I'd see them being more comfortable with rejecting than being rejected. 

No cluster B will be fine with rejection.

Healthy boundaries are their one and only weakness. "What do you mean you are your own person, and not someone that must act according to my whims/beliefs?????? HOW DARE U REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"

Ahahahahaha.

It's kinda sad, but funny really.

user33313 said: 

No cluster B will be fine with rejection.

Healthy boundaries are their one and only weakness. "What do you mean you are your own person, and not someone that must act according to my whims/beliefs?????? HOW DARE U REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"

 

Ahahahahaha.

It's kinda sad, but funny really.

 Is it sad really, all business, money, power, importance, attention, fame, history is based on people being lead aka acting according to the will of someone else.

The tendency to desire to enforce your own will on another human being, or another being generally is a natural inclination.

Is it sad or funny? Depends on your perception. 

I always prefer an accurate "it is what it is" than a direct judgment of an event or a person.

Aizenonimo said: 

user33313 said: 

No cluster B will be fine with rejection.

Healthy boundaries are their one and only weakness. "What do you mean you are your own person, and not someone that must act according to my whims/beliefs?????? HOW DARE U REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"

Ahahahahaha.

It's kinda sad, but funny really.

 Is it sad really, all business, money, power, importance, attention, fame, history is based on people being lead aka acting according to the will of someone else.

The tendency to desire to enforce your own will on another human being, or another being generally is a natural inclination.

not in all cases. 
but that is a fundamental part of personality disorders is they’re unable to comprehend that other people can operate outside their own standards and beliefs 

Is it sad or funny? Depends on your perception. 

I always prefer an accurate "it is what it is" than a direct judgment of an event or a person.

Turncoat said: 

Blanc said: 

Aizenonimo said: 

How do you manage to value love above your own ego? It seems incomprehensible to me

 I think actually there is a value of love that sort of creates security for the ego that is otherwise constantly insecure and more fragile. So the assurance of a partner is not just wanted but it’s very needed. There is a codependency for validation not just love, but validation of them as a whole person because they are otherwise constantly doubting it.

Is that how it is for you? 

 No my dad has Borderline Personality Disorder so the reason I talk about it a lot is I spend a good deal of my life sort of learning to understand the ins and outs of it

it’s extremely difficult to live with. But understanding it does help. Otherwise there is a lot of behavior that just doesn’t make sense and you fill in the gaps in reasoning with your own explanations. It doesn’t turn out good that way. 

Ive realized that the more I learn about it the better it is for me, so my reactions to the behaviors have less emotional volatility 

stfu i am not reading all that

Aizenonimo said: 

AlmightyJim said: 

It's February 2018, me and my trap ex boyfriends unlicensed bitcoin OTC trade office in Warsaw gets busted, everything is taken, except some profits we had on us, which was about 13000 euros

I give him 3000, give him a long hug and a last kiss, I fly back to Bucharest with the first plane I can catch, having to pay a nice premium of 650 euros because the flight was in 3 hours

He sends me a message "Do not contact me again, I am talking to my ex girlfriend and also the police is looking for you, I want nothing to do with you anymore, too much trouble, goodbye"

Now I am at a hotel in Bucharest, looking at the ceiling, thinking of hanging myself, with 10k euros in my pocket (big money for a 23 year old from Turkey), various accomplishments, nothing matters, I want to die, cant take the pain anymore

No matter how much ego you have and how good you are doing in life, without love you are just miserable, and you know this all too well yourself hehe

As a BPD I have severe issues with self-esteem regulation and intense pain caused by it, love saved my life pretty much at this point in my life

 I un-ironically can't relate.

To be real, I always saw love as something to conquer just to prove to myself that I can do it. It was purely based on pride, ego, and maybe a tad of pure pathological narcissism.

If he were to sent me that, and I had 10k in my pocket and was alone in a hotel room, the first thing I would send back would be.

"Have fun staying a poor, deluded, faggot lmao."  

I would see him as something superficial given how he run his usage, and I would just feel good for using him and that's it.

Now if you refer to my past misery cause of lack of love, if anything it was because I didn't win. That's what was wrecking my confidence/ mental health.

Failing, not loving/being loved

See you might be putting things like ego/ love/ confidence/ into different spectrums but. For me there is:

Possession/ depth of possession/ difficulty = win or lose

When I took revenge against the two npd mommies and i rejected them, which happened about a year ago, I recovered my ego.

So since then I really can't even feel loneliness, it's like the very emotion is completely gone.

Yes it does sound like NPD, and yes you do sound like BPD. But in the end every emotional connection/attachment you may have/ i may have/ others may have, is just that, a need. A necessity.

So I prefer to replace it with machiavellian narcissism and a huge+ fragile ego, because the trade off- is worth it.

 

 Your pseudo-NPD has emerged only recently, I still remember you talking about how hurt you were because your e-girls left you and trying to prevent you from killing yourself, you took a bunch of xans and went afk for a while, you were also typing slurred. You felt betrayed and mad because I turned on you with Adolf and were passive aggressive with me for months, so its clear you also have capacity to trust people and form bonds.

I kinda adopted the same kind of coping mechanism as you years ago, convinced myself im a sociopathic narcissistic (the scamming and manipulating girls kinda helped me fuel the fantasy), dulled my feeling and repressed em, then it all exploded and came back full force, into a full breakdown

You are going to pay a heavy price repressing your emotions and denying your sensitive vulnerable BPD nature thats the core of your personality, as all the repressed emotions will come back at once full force. Its better to just deal with them and fix your core instead of larping as a sociopath to deny your vulnearbility, I understand you feel weak, I did the same.

stfu i am not reading all that 

If you genuinely want to inquire about BPD and Narcissism Sam Vaknin on YouTube does have a really interesting and sort of enlightening perspective on this. 

He talks quite extensively about Narcissism so if you genuinely think you have it, it would be helpful to listen. Not to take his words as gospel but simply as food for thought and to generate inquisition and insight on these topics. 

It’s just one perspective like I said, and it’s interesting to hear.

Basically to sum it up, he says, within every ASPD, there is a covert BPD. Within every Narcissist, there is a covert BPD. Wishing every presenting BPD, there is a covert sociopath or ASPD. Yes. Very interesting. 

And then he goes on the say that there is hardly descripency between all personality disorders or there is no need for it, he explains why in his videos and it makes sense. 

And then he goes on to say that at the core of personality disorders is actually trauma. And some are more likely to develop a personality disorder or mental disorder from trauma than others due to a wide wide variety of factors. 

If you want me to find the specific video where he delineated all of this I can find it for you. 

As someone with a personality disordered parent I find it doer of a sigh of relief because I always witnessed this more sociopathic side to my father- who is BPD diagnosed- and it explains why that is there. How it occurs. Etc. It explains why a lot of borderlines end up here on this forum believing they are sociopaths when in reality they are borderlines. Despite having seemingly sociopathic tendencies or delays in empathy. 

It also explains why narcissists are so fragile to rejection. As are sociopaths. 

It explains how a narcissist becomes a narcissist, how they think how they operate, and the specific dynamics that occur in their lives and relationships because of it. And why they think and do the things they do.... 

Aizenonimo said: 

stfu i am not reading all that

Aizenonimo said: 

stfu i am not reading all that