Sociopath Community

No, no, no. You got it all wrong.

If someone is fucked up, you do your best to remove them from your entourage ASAP.

You basically destroy their reputation, and get them fired etc, etc...

No need for looneys, they can't be reasoned with, they need to go AWAY.

Honest to god tbh. Never "deal with them", always remove them. Obviously you can be PC and shoot yourself in the foot, who am I to infringe upon your freedoms?

user33313 said: 

No, no, no. You got it all wrong.

If someone is fucked up, you do your best to remove them from your entourage ASAP.

You basically destroy their reputation, and get them fired etc, etc...

No need for looneys, they can't be reasoned with, they need to go AWAY.

Honest to god tbh. Never "deal with them", always remove them. Obviously you can be PC and shoot yourself in the foot, who am I to infringe upon your freedoms?

I didn't get it wrong, but maybe I wasn't clear; I meant when you're in a situation where you have a stake in that person's success or otherwise you can't get rid of them (e.g., they're your kid). Imagine a hypothetical. 

AppleGenius said: 

When you see a damaged person who gets in the way of you doing things, how do you generally handle the situation?

That depends highly on the damages. 

Do you usually use the carrot, or do you go straight for the stick? In what succession do you use the carrot and the stick? Do you first try out the carrot and then if it doesn't work you beat them a little bit with the stick to see if it rectifies their behavior?

Smacking them with the carrot itself seems effective. 

After you've beaten them a little with a stick, do you continue beating them until they lose all self-esteem, or do you generally try out both a little at a time until you reach some kind of optimum?

It's more about getting them to the next conclusion rather than the desired one. I prefer escalation for it's own sake rather than for some sort of pre-determined destination, so I'll usually just push based on what they're presenting. 

I used to think that if a person is damaged and harmful to other people, you should somehow try to reason with them and include them in your in-group. However, I've changed my mind.

I still do, but they often need a mild form of hazing or conditioning to otherwise more cohesively become a part of it. 

I think people like that need to be smacked around a little so that you can correct their behavior. What I can't seem to wrap my head around is when should you decide that the person is  a lost cause and you should just keep smackin them with the stick whenever they get within one meter of you.

"Lost Cause" means you were on some level making it your own cause in the first place. 

Fuck causes, lets just be in it for the learning. 

you beat them relentlessly

AppleGenius said: 

user33313 said: 

No, no, no. You got it all wrong.

If someone is fucked up, you do your best to remove them from your entourage ASAP.

You basically destroy their reputation, and get them fired etc, etc...

No need for looneys, they can't be reasoned with, they need to go AWAY.

Honest to god tbh. Never "deal with them", always remove them. Obviously you can be PC and shoot yourself in the foot, who am I to infringe upon your freedoms?

I didn't get it wrong, but maybe I wasn't clear; I meant when you're in a situation where you have a stake in that person's success or otherwise you can't get rid of them (e.g., they're your kid). Imagine a hypothetical. 

 What has your child done? 

AppleGenius said: 

user33313 said: 

No, no, no. You got it all wrong.

If someone is fucked up, you do your best to remove them from your entourage ASAP.

You basically destroy their reputation, and get them fired etc, etc...

No need for looneys, they can't be reasoned with, they need to go AWAY.

Honest to god tbh. Never "deal with them", always remove them. Obviously you can be PC and shoot yourself in the foot, who am I to infringe upon your freedoms?

I didn't get it wrong, but maybe I wasn't clear; I meant when you're in a situation where you have a stake in that person's success or otherwise you can't get rid of them (e.g., they're your kid). Imagine a hypothetical. 

Generally, I'm with user. I avoid damaged adults because  I have to put triple the time and energy into taking care of my son.

He hasn't literally wrecked stuff since he was around 7. Back then I had to physically restrain him, both to protect him and to protect the stuff. I took falls down the stairs and everything, so he wouldn't break his neck.

I'm so glad that worked. If he were still throwing fits like that now, he could probably kill me. He's 6'2" now.

And yes, I made this topic under the presupposition that you have some cause and that it's in your best interest to ensure others work together toward that cause, whether it's well-being or destruction of the capitalistic system.

AliceInWonderland said: 

 What has your child done? 

My child has done nothing, but a hypothetical child has grown up twisted and narcissistic.

I need more info. What precisely is the problem?

pm if it's too personal to share here.

In the meantime, Barbara Coloroso is a good read.

Xena said: 

Generally, I'm with user. I avoid damaged adults because  I have to put triple the time and energy into taking care of my son.

He hasn't literally wrecked stuff since he was around 7. Back then I had to physically restrain him, both to protect him and to protect the stuff. I took falls down the stairs and everything, so he wouldn't break his neck.

I'm so glad that worked. If he were still throwing fits like that now, he could probably kill me. He's 6'2" now.

Why are you here, though, if you avoid damaged adults?

Anyway,  the question supposes that you want to do something about it.

So you used mostly the stick, then, no carrot? I guess it worked.