ImNotHer stated: source post
"The Golden Rule or ethic of reciprocity is a moral maxim or principle of altruism found in many human cultures and religions, suggesting it may be related to a fundamental human nature."
How easy is it to live by the golden rule- 'Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You'?
In the grand scheme of things, it's easier than not living by it. When we treat people good we get their business and shared wealth, which leads to good mental health.
People who don't live by it are often miserably one sided, which is the road to poverty and loneliness due to key people cutting them lose, and when people do give them time, they are very lucky and always have something uninteresting to say.
I think you can make an active or passive practice of the Golden Rule. The passive version would be more like "Don't do anything to anyone that you wouldn't want done back to you, etc." This seems to be the most prevalent version, which I think I tend to do most often, as well. I think it could be hard to practice the more active version, because for a truly altruistic intent one has to not be expecting the behavior in reciprocation. That's just "do good unto others" without concern of "as you would have them do unto you". "As you would have them do unto you" turns altruism more selfish, imo. There's self-service in doing good that then places expectation for the same sentiment to be bestowed in return.
I do think humans are intrinsically social creatures and as such, aside from the instigation of hierarchies, the co-operative effect of this Golden Rule ensures a community with cohesive countermeasures to its dissolution. It really is the best situation for mutual survival. Of course, once criteria are placed on exactly who deserves certain acts or not and what kind of return for what kind of action, etc., opens it up to pretty much a situation we tend to have right now (sort of).
I am not sure if this is precisely relevant or tangentially so... I prefer not operating under situations of debt. I don't discount its need in society. However, when someone is nice to you, that expectation for reciprocation can hang in the air. This can also be the case when performing acts of "charity". People can get squirrely when they think there's a debt to be owed by your intercession. I often operate altruistically more out of a kind of social duty, which means I don't even think of reciprocation as necessary since it's just a thing one does in a situation like it when one is part of a certain community. You know?
Perhaps I'm over-sensitive to attachments that seem to manifest under these circumstances. Because I think any other well-meaning citizen would do the same as I would, it's almost annoying to be thanked or returned in kind. At the very least, a sense of disingenuousness often turns gratitude flat.
I'm probably not being clear, but I'm sure some of those schizoids out there get what I mean.
It's easy enough to go by when you have low expectations. Don't expect much out of people and you won't be obligated to do much. If a favor someone offers me is too large, I don't accept it from the collateral that'd follow.
Being the first to do a favor can also set a strong initial impression, having them feel more of a need to consistently "do unto you" unprovoked. Unprovoked is good, as it means you didn't ask for a favor in return and, as such, they'll keep offering it from it simply being a nice gesture instead of a real favor. What I ask of them is never as large as something they've previously asked of me, as for some reason who has done the largest favor for someone tends to stick out more than the numbers overtime. I like being owed, bartering in favors in ways that aim keep it that way by never asking for too much. I also do a lot of little things that are at my own convenience, like fetching something from the kitchen for someone if I happen to already be there, to passively make myself out to be polite without having to expend much effort in doing so.
It doesn't really sound too altruistic anymore when I sort it out like this.
ImNotHer stated: source post
"The Golden Rule or ethic of reciprocity is a moral maxim or principle of altruism found in many human cultures and religions, suggesting it may be related to a fundamental human nature."
How easy is it to live by the golden rule- 'Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You'?
I always thought the golden rule was all about teaching empathy. Before you're about to 'do unto' take pause and think if you want that done unto ya. I think it's pretty easy to live this way (most of the time).
anastacia stated: source post
I find that following this practice is much easier in a professional realm because I've always viewed problematic people (customers) as a challenge so my efforts would go above and beyond the patience of others for my own satisfaction.
Outside of that... A few people here know me too well for me to give an answer other than the utmost truth. Regrettably, I keep trying when my treatment isn't reciprocated and I'm not sure why.
On the surface, it would be easy to say that it is on account of your lack of self-confidence, and low self-worth. But perhaps it also relates to your submissive nature?
I have the opposite problem. Wherein "problematic" people are concerned, something in me that is very deeply rooted, and stronger than any ideal I may aspire to, refuses to comply. I have a lot of trouble backing down from conflict. If someone is aggressive with me, I will fight back, and seek to win at virtually any cost. It has caused me a few problems in life.