Sociopath Community

"Your narratives try to make however you are at the time sound like it's less of a problem than it is"

How?

"so I have trouble knowing what to believe related to your sobriety states when I can't see it right in front of me. This could just as easily be truth as it is convenient excuses."

Sure; it's the Internet.

"Stating that you were "once worse" for instance could be excusing being almost as bad with that past instance as the reference point of warning, blinding you to the risks that are in place from it being "better than then"."

I'm not breaking household appliances, and I wake up and have an orderly day.

"Substance abuse is a hard battle that is typically accompanied with levels of denial, especially when the attachment isn't just physical, so it's easier to lean towards assuming the worse likely outcome to more likely be the case when a history of severity has been established. I don't know how much of the testimony that I can trust when the narration could be unreliable from a variety of factors."

I engaged in this for the dialogue of it. Surely you've noticed how much I ignore the subject when brought up, or even entertain it. In the end, it doesn't matter to me whether or not you believe what I have to say.

But we love you.(° 3°)

You have enough composure in your typing while intoxicated to somewhat conceal how you actually are feeling at the time, and when accused of being intoxicated I'd see you being just as likely to say "No" from not being drunk as you might from simply not perceiving yourself as feeling drunk enough. 

You have the ability to hide it when you're typing, something that someone less used to drinking might fail at. I also think that, no matter what state you're in, that you'd struggle to see your attachment to substances as much of a problem in the present, only the past. Your words diminish the impact of what's going on whether it's warranted or not, so naturally that adds some difficulty in seeing if it ought to be taken at face value. 

I don't see you as one who'd admit to weakness unless it can be written off as something in the past, or at least I'd see it as a struggle to do so without someone or something prodding that in a reinforcing fashion. That impression you have of being in control of yourself was present both then and now, which has me unable to know how much control is actually there. 

That read like L. Ron Hubbard on Nyquil.

"You have enough composure in your typing while intoxicated to somewhat conceal how you actually are feeling at the time, and when accused of being intoxicated I'd see you being just as likely to say "No" from not being drunk as you might from simply not perceiving yourself as feeling drunk enough. 

You have the ability to hide it when you're typing, something that someone less used to drinking might fail at. I also think that, no matter what state you're in, that you'd struggle to see your attachment to substances as much of a problem in the present, only the past. Your words diminish the impact of what's going on whether it's warranted or not, so naturally that adds some difficulty in seeing if it ought to be taken at face value or not."

If that is your position, what's the point of a dialogue?

Purely for seeing the responses that follow, which narrative will be taken before seeing where things go next after the fact. I can't tell the future, but the words said could paint a possible picture of where things might go. 

Four months of work is good, I'm glad to hear that that's been the case. I'll be hoping that that doesn't become a past tense relapse story down the line from something throwing a spanner into the works. I've known addicts, and watching their behaviors... it's not something that ever really truly goes away, especially if it's incorporated into their personality. 

So you are a pedo!

ps. i dont want to corpses. i wank to the act of them becoming corpses. a corpse is boring, cold and rotting(disgusting)

Xena stated: source post

" I was hot for a 33 year old. "

^ Read it again.

a woman who checks out 33 year old guys.

You sound batshit when you try to call somebody a pedo for checking out a 33 year old.

Rubbish. 

You said yourself that you had to google that singer and that’s how you just recently found out that 1., he’s currently 33, and 2., at the time of the recording he was 25.   What you originally said at the time was that you got ‘hot’ for someone possibly around your own child’s age.  And that’s what is being discussed by Anal etc.. The singer’s current actual age (which you were unaware of at the time) is irrelevant to the matter.

---

I see this Xena / pedo thing is still rolling - as i said before, i don’t think xena is a bona fide pædophile. (Or not a self-aware one anyway.)  

It seems more the case that she has a rather blurred idea (if any idea at all) about what ‘normal’ and ‘abnormal conduct’ is.  

Likewise, (going by her posting history) she’s pretty much indiscriminative about whom/what she humps  (like those small dogs who’d jerk on every chair-leg, shoe, stuffed toy.)    

I doubt  she’d have a particular fetish - or even a preference - for prepubescent children  (which is the definition of pædophilia)  -  might be more like as a “last resort” scenario, but that’s still not a pædo in the clinical sense, just a predatory creep likely with some other underlying disfunction(s) / disorder(s).

Take this one for example,  from the last homeless shelter stint  (talking with Obsi):

http://www.psychforums.com/antisocial-personality/topic116425-130.html

Xena stated:

Maybe I'll jump at the chance to get called a narc and a liar this weekend when I have nothing better to do. Unless the girlie who checked me out last night and showed me her nudie pics is a real lesbian for a change.

Xena stated: 

Yet another deathwatch for the lump of putrid flesh and foul words that used to be my mother is over. YAY! I don't have to go visit her, so I have an hour here and there.

So I'm going to find my girlie and lose my tongue for a few days. I think she's for real I was floored when she told me how young she is. She's 5'10" and smart, so I thought she was older. I don't care if she's my daughter's age. Fuk the cookie guilt and fuk the IQ test and fuk the stupid plugin. I'm getting laid.

 

Xena stated:  

Anyway, I don't have time to argue with privileged penis creatures who think the deck's not stacked. I'm busy making friends and rebuilding my life.

I gotta go, so go troll somebody else. This girlie might even be the roomie I need. No fuking way am I letting some internet troll stand in the way of that

Xena stated:   

Didn't find my girlie last night, but I asked around about her. Apparently she has a penis  

Xena stated: 

Pride? What's that? Didn't I recently go public with the fact that I sometimes fall asleep on myself when I'm trying to masturbate?  

Xena stated:  

Btw, thanx to Obsi for the distraction. That gave me some time for some sober second thought re my new fukbuddy. She seems like a smartie too, so this might be pure projection, but I think she might be in the same devalued position I'm in.

Or she might be a creepy mad flasher like all the girls are saying. She's never tried to grope me, tho. Baby Dyke did grind up against my ass, and it's her little gf who has the problem with my prospect.

I hope it's not true. She's better looking than any woman who's checked me out in over a decade. She's the 3rd hottest trannie I know personally. Not readable at all. I thought she was born female. Even her voice is hot. Like Kes on Voyager. 

She's here and she read my invitation letter. Wish me luck

Xena stated: 

That's why I was floored by the flirting. She's pretty too. This is a rare and well timed opportunity, and I'm really hoping we'll spend a good part of the weekend just getting into each other. I need to touch something pretty, smell baby powder, listen to somebody sweet talking, comparing me to a Boticelli. I don't care if she's lying through her teeth. Gruesome pics of my dead mother are fuking with my head right now.

 

(Obsidian said:   Did your mother die? Didn't you hate her anyway? :­P )

Xena stated: 

Yeah, but the pictures are disgusting and I hate looking into the mirror and seeing her fat on me. I haven't eaten since yesterday.   

(etc.) 

- well maybe the “smell baby powder”  may cause second thoughts for some,  but i still doubt that xena is a legit, diagnosable pædo.   The (alleged) transsexual homeless target was something like 20-ish at the time?  Well post-adolescence, in any case.   

(Nope, i didn’t have to “search” for all that.  Certain mis-spellings tend to stick in my brain - it’s a curse, really - so it was only one google-click away.   I included some superfluous gems - like “privileged penis creature” etc. -  for the comedy value. )

Alterego stated: source post

Hm. All out of deep, introspective thoughts, are we? It's ok to not be focused on personal growth all the time. Keep fawning over the pedofuck, just like daddy trained you, since it would appear you don't have anything more substantive to say.

Those kind of words don't hurt me anymore, Alter. I know who I am too well now, and have more confidence in my worth. Besides, you already showed me how you see me when you did my voice. None of your old tricks can take that away from me. :)

she showed how she sees you or how she thinks you see yourself? /plottwist