One thing I have noticed is impatience with ADHD. It's like the future is now.
I'll stop talking about ADHD. I just have to post this one link... It explains it all imo.
http://healingbright.com/29-things-only-a-person-with-adhd-would-understand/
I know I could answer this better if given the time, but I'm about to head out soon, so here's a quick version that probably has some holes in it:
She's extremely prone to reinvention of what's going on and what's happened, a view that's distorted by her lens in strange ways followed by a zeal that accepts it as truth even when it contradicts herself at points. It's not mere cherry-picking for what parts of posts are worth responding to, it's scattered weirdness much of the time (sometimes responding in a way that's closer to cherry-picking from entirely imaginary words) that's so far off what was being discussed that we're stuck studying her from a third person perspective instead of a second one to try to comprehend where this conversation has gone and will go. Her version goes with her never being wrong with strange stories, assumptions, and excuses that aim to worm around that, and her solutions to things that seem perfectly reasonable to her are at points otherworldly. She also has shown a strong penchant for high levels of denial, which I mean, who doesn't have some denial, but her expressions of it are more blatant and numerous in their strength and quantity, a trait that should give the reader some skepticism instead of trust over the narration. Even her ideas behind certain concepts, like what an apology constitutes, shows skew, and she doesn't seem to understand the differences and people's confusion over it beyond demonizing people to help her continue her belief of her being the "normal" one, a way that keeps an us vs them view very black and white between who feeds her stories and who denies them.
Do you personally believe everything that comes out of her fingertips? If she were the main character of a book I was reading, I'd first be looking around for hints that this person's version is not the truth of the story, but that character's version ala One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest or Fight Club, then if that yielded no fruit I'd look into the author's past to see what sort of lens is there to make such a work. Enough of the words stink strongly enough to warrant suspicion, and with said suspicion there's been a fair deal of holes. I can't fully explain what's going on with her, just likelihood of how she'll respond at most, and this keeps me curious, digging for more examples and self-demonstrations. The longer it goes on, the more we seem to find, having me question where it'll even end or if it'll eventually spell out something completely unexpected from a current lack of data. It's the sheer zeal behind her strange posts in lieu of any room to deny her own narrative that keeps me wondering.
She stumbles onto very strange conclusions, and I want to figure out where that's coming from.
GerardW: I luv ur cock second best, Nyar11:22 Nyarlathotep:thicker at the base11:22 GerardW: oooh- 11:23 GerardW: nyar, role-playing time
- 11:23 Nyarlathotep: oh, fuck you Gerry XD
- 11:23 Nyarlathotep: still recovering from my toy tim with VoV
- 11:23 GerardW: Nyar, can I ride you?
- 11:24 GerardW: I wanna slam down on your thicc cock
- 11:25 Nyarlathotep:youse so silly,Gerry
- 11:26 GerardW: im not being silly
- 11:26 GerardW: I'm being serious
- 11:26 Nyarlathotep:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEe_eraFWWs
- 11:29 GerardW: YouTube is slow baby
11:29 
GerardW: but you're not slow ;-)
"I know I could answer this better if given the time, but I'm about to head out soon, so here's a quick version that probably has some holes in it:"
No problem.
"She's extremely prone to reinvention of what's going on and what's happened, a view that's distorted by her lens in strange ways followed by a zeal that accepts it as truth even when it contradicts herself at points."
I agree.
A man she was living with was changing her daughter's diaper. She stabbed him, because she thought she heard her daughter utter a "safeword" as a cue for if someone was touching her inappropriately. I can understand the motherly impulse to grab a knife, but it's how she reacted that speaks the most. It was a reflexive action which is certainly tied with her misandry. One could simply grab a knife and be sure of what was going on, by getting a proper visual angle on what was happening. But instead she stabbed an innocent man.
Her attitude toward the incident is flippant, and revealing of the "I do what I think is right, when I think it's right" attitude (that she chose the name Xena is no coincidence). She chalks the incident up to a "mistake," but expresses no remorse over the situation, and no verbalized introspection concerning the incident. Yet she does not hesitate to lambaste others for their behaviors, including my drinking, and probably a slew of things said to you, Sugar, and Crow after you all spurred things on. I've been spending less time in the threads, but I have a hunch I'm correct.
"It's not mere cherry-picking for what parts of posts are worth responding to, it's scattered weirdness much of the time (sometimes responding in a way that's closer to cherry-picking from entirely imaginary words) that's so far off what was being discussed that we're stuck studying her from a third person perspective instead of a second one to try to comprehend where this conversation has gone and will go."
She's stated that she sometimes "reverse-trolls." I imagine that would be what you are describing.
"Her version goes with her never being wrong with strange stories, assumptions, and excuses that aim to worm around that, and her solutions to things that seem perfectly reasonable to her are at points otherworldly."
Xena, the Warrior Princess. More on that in a moment.
"She also has shown a strong penchant for high levels of denial, which I mean, who doesn't have some denial, but her expressions of it are more blatant and numerous in their strength and quantity, a trait that should give the reader some skepticism instead of trust over the narration. Even her ideas behind certain concepts, like what an apology constitutes, shows skew."
I would assume she would be distrustful of narratives from people she feels attack her. I'll get into the denial toward the end. Could you elaborate on the last part of what you said?
"Do you personally believe everything that comes out of her fingertips?"
That was rhetorical...right?
"I can't fully explain what's going on with her, just likelihood of how she'll respond at most, and this keeps me curious, digging for more examples and self-demonstrations. The longer it goes on, the more we seem to find, having me question where it'll even end or if it'll eventually spell out something completely unexpected from a current lack of data.
She stumbles onto very strange conclusions, and I want to figure out where that's coming from."
This is what I pieced together. She had to be homeless at quite a young age, which for any young person is going to be a transformative experience. The feeling of being totally alone in a world that seemed (and likely was) hostile caused her to build a persona which had to be strong, in order to survive. For example, she would have to steal to have something to eat. I do not think a person can do that without feeling resentment, and perhaps that's a good explanation for her distaste for the opulent.
For survival, she associated with other homeless persons—as well as prostitutes—and I'm willing to bet that's where her misandry and feminism roots from. Having a life like that so young, one is prone to develop black-and-white thinking in a world where early on, only experience or guidance can teach us how grey areas can be.
A personality which feels strength is the only mode of survival combined with a mind that thinks in black-and-white is like a fortress. This is why she relates to the attitude of Xena. To this day she still speaks in combative terms, and while amenable to reason, she feels reflexively combative toward perceived threats. If we think about that sort of mindset as a fortress of sorts which was originally built to psychologically survive, it is also considerably reasonable to assume there are a set of self-defense mechanisms that act as a moat. Being prone to rationalization, deflection, idealization, projection, and random interjections for "lulz" are a far cry from psychotic disorders (though most of what I listed are typically involved in them).
Xena, I do not mean to attack you with this. If you feel I have misunderstood, please clarify.
"She stumbles onto very strange conclusions, and I want to figure out where that's coming from"
lol you're still weaving your analysis around the assumption that I believe my own bullshit.
You could drive yourself crazy like that.
It's ok Turn. You're muh main man ;)
Just in case I'm assuming too much of your theatre and academic background again, here is the classic scit at the heart of the RainMan's obsession and echolalia, portrayed in the vid above.
- 1:20 Litany: Are you not seeing other people?
- 1:20 Cricket Von Chirp: No, I stopped seeing other people a few months ago
- 1:20 Litany: Oh.
- 1:21 Litany: Muted.
- Daniella: GER FUCK YOU BITCH
- 3:36 GerardW: lol
- 3:36 Daniella: HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST I COMMIT SUICIDE
- 3:36 Daniella: YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS
- 3:36 GerardW: youre triggered.
- 3:36 GerardW: no, im not
- 3:36 Daniella: YES YOU ARE
- 3:36 GerardW: i am not
- 3:37 GerardW: chapo, is dani an alien?
- 3:38 Chapo: no shes either delusional or retarded
- 3:38 GerardW: probaly both
- 3:39 GerardW: i suggested that she kill herself since shes think shes an alien or a hybrid. now shes triggered
