Sociopath Community

I personally never liked authority figures because they all think they know what's best for you. Just because there older. For example my last to years of high school all I wanted to do was work on music and just drop out of school because it was a waste of time. But my dad framed me and that got me one year of juvenile detention for a crime I didn't commit.

So the only reason I would even attend class is because I was required to by law. Over and over again teachers told me that I should focus on there useless school work and how it would benefit me and help me become successful. Now after I dropped out I'm about to start my own record label plus a second one with an associate who has a recording studio. On top of that I should be playing for a live crowd soon. The point is, that in terms of business my life is going great because I did what I wanted and not what others thought would be best for me.

Moving on, I don't like to focus on feelings of hate because it corrupts the mind more than any known substance in my opinion. It destroys you from the very depths of your soul (not the literal soul, I don't really believe in god or deny god). But I did use to hate the shit out of my dad (lol) and maybe society a bit as well. Recently though, I've reached a point were I could care less about the existence of anyone in society. Yet alone feel empathy for society. I think the only person left on earth I feel empathy for is myself.

Now I do have these thoughts that I might be Narcissistic, Sociopathic, Psychopathic or whatever. It's not something that worry's me though. It's just something I want and need to know. Now I could talk to a trained Psychologist, Psychiatrist, therapist or whatever who are trained to respond in a specific way. But I feel more comfortable talking to actual people who experience similar feelings in a sense. All though I will consult with one of three just for the hell of it later on.

As far as narcissism goes though, it's sort of obvious that everybody needs a bit of narcissism to keep a good self-asteem and confidence. I believe there's a line though between healthy narcissism and unhealthy narcissism. I really never mind crossing that line at all though. In fact, I enjoy crossing it. It's like knowing that too much narcissism is bad, but I don't mind it. I don't believe that means I have NPD though. Since I'm aware of it and all.

As far as being a Sociopath goes (not saying I am), I'm really not sure. I'm just really fascinated by all these different disorders to be honest. Especially when you can notice them in yourself and in others (to an extent of course). The thing is though, a lot of it could just be delusion. I really find that I bridge the line between sanity and insanity from time to time as well though. But I like it that way. Too much sanity can be boring. 

Also, I get depressed off and on, sort of like a cycle. I'm usually pretty happy producing music and focusing on work. Then I get bored. Then I find some sort of way to relieve that boredom. Then I feel satisfied and happy again. Then when that feeling of satisfaction is gone I get depressed, then bored again.

I guess that solves the Sociopath issue then. Do I meet the criteria for ASPD? Well knowing that I'm not a Sociopath, that would only leave being the possibility of being a Psychopath left. Which is highly unlikely but I'll look into it.

Answering your questions first I think my dad fucked me over around when I was sixteen or seventeen so that has no specific meaning besides the fact that my dad was an asshole lol. Surprisingly enough I'm 20 years old. You'd figure I'd be working or something rather something but like I mentioned earlier my job is to produce music. So I have a lot of free time when I'm not doing that or studying for music.

So the first one would be "failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest". I couldn't say that describes me. But I'm not really sure what social norms are. I guess I never break them though. Not recently anyway so I'd have to cross that one of the list.

Two would be "deception, as indicated by repeatedly lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure". I personally feel like I'm an amazing liar. I used to lie all the time for money from friends and family. I would have the most in depth stories about what I needed to buy. In reality though I just went to go buy drugs and alcohol and have some of the best nights of my life. I think that's kind of normal though so that's another crossed off the list.

Three would be "impulsivity or failure to plan ahead". I personally plan ahead very well. But I also to tend to find myself making very impulsive decisions. This one is sort of confusing but I would have to say over all I'm a pretty impulsive person. For example everyday I follow my daily routine and schedule which is the closest thing to the perfect life. But the trick to my routine and schedule is that I created in order to work with my impulsive tendency's while still getting work done. Overall I could agree with this one.

Four would be "irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults". Well I do get irritated very easily. Especially when someone moves my cup from the sink when I place it in the exact same spot everyday. How foolish could you be to not see that my cup is in the same spot everyday. Things like that happen all around my household though. My family (so to speak) doesn't have the best organization skills though. So theres lots of irritation. That seems like it would be the same for other people though. As far as being aggressive goes, I'm very passive aggressive but rarely violently aggressive. When I am pushed though, I'll make your existence a living hell for that point in time. For this one my behavior which wasn't explained much but seems normal too me. So I'd have to cross this one off the list.

Five would be "reckless disregard for safety of self or others". Well I do love stealing alcohol from safeway. it's like taking candy from a candy store (I don't think tut's the original analogy lol). All you have to do is walk in and smile at all the staff there, take the alcohol of your choice smile at all the staff again, then walk out and leave. I usual bring friends along to use them as distractions. I personally don't really care if they get caught or not. But I don't think they ever would with me making the plans to be honest. So I wouldn't really say that I'm "reckless". So this one would be crossed off.

Six would be "consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations". Currently I am having a very time maintaing my routine and schedule designed for working on music and studying business, language, and music theory to help speed up the process of everything. So from time to time I find myself disregarding all of that for the sole purpose of being irresponsible. It is a little difficult managing all those things every single day of my life though. My max was doing it everyday for a month. Right now I'm about four days into it. So yeah I do have a big issue with irresponsibility. So I could agree with this one.

Finally the last one would be "lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another". I personally feel no remorse for any of my actions. I am neither insane or evil so all that I say is just and has a reason to it. Just kidding lol. But yeah I really don't feel guilty or ashamed for anything that I've done in life. I have no reason too. Those feelings would only hold me back from what I want. So I can agree with this one. I honestly think aside from the whole ASPD thing that not feeling guilt or shame is sort of necessary in business though.

Concluding everything, I agree with three out of seven of those things. So overall I would have to conclude that I'm not a Sociopath or Psychopath. Just an intelligent individual (not a genius or anything) with way too much free time on my hands. I guess I have to work on filling those times of boredom with specific activities as well. I might not even be intelligent. Just really curious. Also as far a narcissism goes I'm sure I have a healthy amount. Maybe a little extra than normal, but nothing devastating.

One last thought though. If someone was a psychopath, would it be possible for them to have multiple subtypes. One subtype is nomadic which includes schizoid and avoidant features. Another subtype is Malevolent which includes sadistic and paranoid features. Risk-taking is also another one which has histrionic features. The final one that would fit would be Reputation-defending which has narcissistic features.

So a new question arises. Is it possible for a Psychopath to have overlapping subtypes that build up the personality and characteristics of that individual?

Whoa… Looking at that huge post I can tell you this, man: you care too much. The psychopaths I've met weren't/aren't this introspective, they couldn't/can't give a shit.

Yeah I know. That's why I concluded that I'm not a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath. I'm just wounding what triggered me to even believe such nonsense in the first place lol.

ok i don't usually do this, but no sweetie. just no.

I know that at this point. But I'm still interested in learning more about them.

Why not?

you're already DEAD wrong.

by 3xpRess94

I guess that solves the Sociopath issue then. Do I meet the criteria for ASPD? Well knowing that I'm not a Sociopath, that would only leave being the possibility of being a Psychopath left. Which is highly unlikely but I'll look into it.