Do you keep logs of it or is it just mental notes? I'm keeping logs of my irl interactions to gauge my emotional responses and work out those of others. It helps me to notice patterns.
Development of Cognitive empathy within an individual of the ASPD type can be very dangerous for others. It brings a very impressive tool to the manipulation tool box. The development of affective empathy... are you having any luck with that? Cognitive is so much easier...
No luck with the affective empathy yet. I've scanned myself multiple times using MR and the neurological structures (amygdala, anterior cingulate, insula) involved in affective empathy and emotion in general don't seem to be hardwired for the affective aspect. The areas involved in cognitive empathy and introspection (medial prefrontal, brain stemi), however, appear to be well intact. My limbic system structures, in general, are a couple of standard deviations below normal volume. I doubt that will change.
I recently started tracking my diffusion tensor parameters to see if there are changes in white matter integrity between the areas involved in affective empathy and processing improves over time with treatment. I scanned myself last year and will do so again soon.
I definitely plan to make a "better me". That is not my only motivation however. My research could potentially be beneficial for clinical populations with disorders characterized by alterations or deficits in sociooemotional and empathetic processing, such as AsPD, NPD, BPD and ASD. This is something that will also keep me from getting bored and allows for the formation of an overall, generalized Empathy Theory, which is something that neuroscience is currently lacking.
Groups are difficult, especially if multiple people in a group know me from different contexts. I frequently wander off and pretend to have other things to do, such as help with set up or as if I need to visit the bathroom. Friends have commented still on my behavior being like a "chameleon" with changing speech patterns and mannerisms to suit the situation. Very few are able to observe that as I try to keep friends groups separate, though sometimes it is unavoidable.
You might find the diary approach to be helpful in remembering who you are supposed to be with different individuals. Sometimes it's difficult to keep track.
You know most of us do that as kids right? I know I did. I can't think of a time when i didn't understand how people feel and why, it's the reason i'm so good at playing others. I just can't relate to those feelings because I don't experience them. Idk why you would want that as it would make you vulnerable to things your mind wasn't wired to handle.
Wow, that's exactly how I felt for a long time. Nowadays it's just uncomfortable, although interesting to see in which role you yourself end up in.
Edit: Yeah, the need to network haunts me. Acting 'professional' is the best solution I could find for this social bubble, yet.
Edit2: And I think the diary approach is very interesting, but I don't like to be put in a situation where I would have to explain that diary to someone close.
Cricket stated: source post
The empathy training that I'm going through right now consists of stopping and imagining how I would feel in a situation, observing if it matches the reaction of the other, and adjusting to imagine a situation in which I would feel what the other is feeling if those do not match up. Then I respond accordingly.
The formula begins "I understand that you are feeling..." to show validate the other's feelings. Then I am to show understanding and identification with the others emotional state by citing a time when I experienced a similar situation. After that I can offer advice or say something supportive, such as "If you need to talk..." or "Have you tried/considered..." I am not to use any invalidating words like "but" or "however".
I'm also practicing reciprocal communication by repeating what the other has said like "What I'm hearing you say is..." to ensure that I am understanding the other properly.
The progress that I have seen is that people seem to feel closer to me and are more likely to trust me. Even the few that know I am in treatment for PD seem to feel that I am invested in them personally and it has increased the quality of my relationships.
"Empathy Training" to me sounds like a load of bunk. I think you mean to call it "Perspective Taking", as that jargon is too detached to call empathy. Your aim to repeat back what they're saying also isn't a genuine connection, it's simply a way to feign understanding that many people use to shortcut the process in an attempt to get their foot in the door (ie con men). I'm guessing the next stage is going to be Method Acting? Anyone used to resisting cons is going to see through that process immediately if you don't accompany it with some sort of distraction.
Watching those who have empathy honestly express it almost more like an affliction. I've seen people who didn't want to feel what others were expressing, even going to extreme lengths to avoid the sources of it to keep themselves more balanced. If you have to actively think about it, then it's something else entirely, as it's really more of an unconscious autopilot for those who aren't properly able to distance themselves from those around them.
I wouldn't wish that handicap on anyone. It looks fairly overwhelming and distracting.