Good song.
by EdvardTrust is important to me. I do my best not to betray other people's trust. Betray mine, and I'm very tempted to make you regret it.
This. But I don't get even, I quite enjoy collecting tax while I pretend to have forgiven, and continue taking until I just vanish after you've paid me back everything I want. Or if I can't go that route, there are other routes we can explore.
by SensitiveSoulIt is a big topic and I will just bring up a fragment. Whether you trust or not is not just a result of your experience. Even more I think it is about yourself, unless you have pathological paranoia.
I am a very trusting person. I do think most people are as reliable as they say. Why? Probably because I am extremely reliable myself. I'm probably projecting my qualities on them, since I cannot know what goes on inside their minds. It is a natural thing to just assume people think what we think.
I once lived in a kind of big dorm. Of 40 people, only two people kept their doors locked when they were out. I noticed someone had been sniffing around in my room, so I trapped them of sorts. The same two people that locked their doors. No one of those leaving their doors unlocked entered my room without my permission. They thought for real others were the same kind of creeps they were.
That is all I have on the subject. For now.
Projection. The problem with projection is if you're conscious of it. I'm sorry, I'm trailing off topic a bit. Maybe I should make a new topic about the problem of being conscious of one's own actions. Anyway, I do think people project their own qualities onto others. A person who doubts others is more likely to be doubted himself. They say a liar recognizes a liar. Thanks for sharing.
by RasserenataTo share the name of the one who betrayed me? I'm not like that at all, so I won't ruin their so precious internet identity they like hiding so much behind their fake paranoia. :D
Instead, I will elaborate on my perception of trust.
All I can say for myself is that one cannot expect the world to be like one desires, and the pawns around can tell you as much. (Now I'm speaking generally) You can be as reliable as you say you are, but there is also the thought of not being reliable at all. If there's one thing, there inevitably exists the other. So what stops the other people from not being reliable as much as we wished?
It is self-centered to pretend the world owes us the same amount we give them. This is an uneven, varied world. Some live by the dog-eat-dog adagio; some have grown beyond that, and that's how we should see it. The many perspectives. If something's gonna be useful for someone, they will cherish it. What may be treasure to you, might be trash for someone else.
Then there are the ones who distrust but are very much at peace with themselves. I don't trust anyone, to be honest. There's nothing in the world that anyone says that I believe, unless I see it for myself. That doesn't necessarily mean I'm not honest, though. I'm pretty much a preacher when I'm not coocoo for anxiety. I like listening to people, playing along, and when they ask, I tell them about me.
And that's that. No sweat over it. Shit happens. Life goes on. Some people might just not be ready to rely on someone. Who knows? shrugs All I know is that I'll be there no matter what.
I'm too scattery for this kind of stuff - I may not be making much sense here, but that's more or less what I believe happens when someone twists my trust.
Thanks for the insight. Not everyone values trust by an equal amount. Are you talking about one-sided trust? People trust you, but you don't trust them? How about if they've continually succeeded with convincing they're trustworthy, would it then not be even logical to trust them with something?
by hypercubeI find it difficult to trust people.
If I tell someone something, I find a way to accept the concept of them telling someone else.
I agree that trust makes you vulnerable.
Not having trust makes you lonely.
Neither of those feelings is particularly nice.
Addressing the root of the problem I see :)
by DamagedAfter they're done regretting it, is trust gone forever, or do things reset back to where they were?
I'd like to know this as well. I suppose it varies. A person who continually breaks peoples' will most likely find it harder to establish trust.
How about betrayal? I'd really like to hear what people have to say about it. What is it about being betrayed that makes people fear it? I'm genuinely curious about hearing other people's view on the matter.
by hypercubeThe easiest way to trust someone is to get to know them, if you see who they are you can generally see what they will do. Sometimes people surprise you, but in general it makes more sense to trust reality than to trust faith.
I am confused about whether you agree with me or not. I condensed my thoughts on the subject. I meant experience to mean your knowledge about a certain person; that knowledge prepares your mind to start expecting certain behavior, etc. This develops into trust.
Edit: to be sure, you can trust someone to hurt you just as much as you can trust someone to help you
Legga: If I should not post in your thread, please advise and i will delete. Thanks! Emily
by wilfulWhat makes us so fearful is that we know the evil within ourselves.
"Perfect love casts out all fear"
Where we speak and do all things with love, no one can manipulate divide or betray us by our fear.
"This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man" - Shakespeare's Hamlet
1. The best way I know to develop trust is to be trustworthy myself. It keeps my conscience clearminded so I can better see conflicts coming in advance that would otherwise betray trust or violate boundaries.
All the mistakes I ever made in judgment came from me not seeing something in myself I could resolve better first.
2. Forgiveness - by forgiving and resolving past issues, I can better trust myself to know what I am doing so I can explain and work with others openly. If I am blocked by fear or unforgiveness, they won't trust me either.
3. Correcting issues or mistakes that do happen
We can never foresee all things in advance. All we can do is commit to resolving them so they don't repeat. If we cut things off and blame or judge others for it; then we are bound to repeat those mistakes with the next person.
but if we go through all the trouble of fixing what went wrong, both sides can learn how they could improve. And prevent something similar because we will understand why it happened.
By forgiving we can better see how to correct problems. And this builds working relations and trust. Unconditionally, regardless if things go right or wrong, we trust each other to be honest in fixing it anyway. Thanks this is a good topic. I will remove my post if Legga says it is too long. Sorry for that!