Genius. :D
by LycanRook throttles bishop .
Bishop knocks over king in death throes.
King is mortally wounded and defecates involuntarily.
Monkey throws shit at pawn.
Pawn gags and trips over rook, breaking an arm in 3 places and screaming loudly.
With the distraction of the screaming pawn , black queen (me), pushes white king (you), into a bathtub filled with water and drops a hairdryer in.
Checkmate
I strongly suggest a delving into the history of Egypt, the land of Canaan and Anatolia.
These appear to be the protoplastic areas for research into agricultural interdependencies, relating to overabundance of food production and trade.
Another area of interest would be the Orient.