Actually, yes she has.
So your lady friend in the hospital, signaled for you to keep your distance and you said you wanted to respect that, but here you are.
You claim to be callous toward these kind of things, when friends or family end up on the sick bed. Maybe your wife knows that about you, but this time you really want to reach out to that ill woman you're acquainted with, though you're not really good friends with her.
You don't even know why she's in the hospital, see how that reads man ?
That is the type of thing that can bring insecurity to your partner. If your wife says, sure, go see your lady friend, or asks how she is, be careful. People fallout all the time after decades and sometimes they don't see it coming.
I'm not callous.
At any rate, you've misunderstood, because you don't know me or my relationships sufficiently well, and perhaps that is my fault for not communicating well or setting proper boundaries. You're placing yourself in my situation, and presuming that your relationship with your girlfriend is similar to the relationship I have with my wife, who I've been with for over 10 years, whom I married, and with whom I have a daughter.
I did not ask for your advice on my relationship with my wife and I don't need it either. If you have something to say on the actual topic, I'd be very happy to listen and would be very grateful.
I'm not callous.
You said yourself you tend to ignore your family and friends when hospitalized many times.
But you say you're not callous, okay.
At any rate, you've misunderstood, because you don't know me or my relationships sufficiently well, and perhaps that is my fault for not communicating well or setting proper boundaries. You're placing yourself in my situation, and presuming that your relationship with your girlfriend is similar to the relationship I have with my wife, who I've been with for over 10 years, whom I married, and with whom I have a daughter.
It isn't rocket science Legga, and no I don't compare my relationship to yours.
- The lady in the hospital kept you at a distance.
-She's not really a good friend.
Yet despite your claim to respect her wish you're insistant to come running in for a change anyway.
Stuff like that does more harm than good for your personal relationship, is that not obvious ?
Relationships need to be maintained. There are plenty of divorced people with daughters, from lack of consideration.
I did not ask for your advice on my relationship with my wife and I don't need it either. If you have something to say on the actual topic, I'd be very happy to listen and would be very grateful.
Cut the shit, It's all on topic demon, and it's good fucking advice.
This whole scene is foolishness on your behalf. Married man going off course from his social norms to to bring cheer to some chick who pushes him away and keeps him out of the loop from a hospital bed. And here you are, looking for another route to "do the right thing" for a change.
People question that type of behavior and make posts about it Legga.
You may say you're sure your wife is okay with it, but if she has a functioning triune brain it'll trigger her in ways that won't exactly score you any points.
I would certainly listen to you if you had stock or crypto advice, or there was an area where I was lacking. There are clearly numerous places where I could learn from you, and have already learned from you.
However, I'd say I've been more successful thus far with my romantic relationships than you have been with yours. If anything, I should be giving you advice on your romantic relationships. I have been rather successful in this regard.
If you have romantic advice for me I'll listen. It's not like a guy ever get's to settle with his first pick, though I don't pursue women, which is how it should be.
In my personal experience trust turns out to be a bad idea.
There's that saying "It takes two" but really it takes one, and it could be the mistake of either one.
Last year I had this lady friend wanting to plan an outing with me. Just us as friends. She does have a place in my heart, think about her very often. I declined her offer and now I cut her out completely, and why ?
I'd go be one of her options if I weren't already in a relationship, though it also helps that my old pal there is pretty crazy and will most likely eat my soul if we hit it off, so out of wisdom did I let go of someone I love. The road to deprivation is with my lady friend there. Currently there's a mental block preventing her from reaching out to be, and it was I who put it there.
If you know how to make anyone love you I'm intetested. What I do know about relationships is partially presented here, that being going out one on one with women friends can to detrimental to a relationship regardless of what happens, it'll damage trust.
If you do welcome advice, my advice is for you to ditch your girlfriend because you don't trust one another.
From what you tell me, it sounds you have no trust in her and you expect that she has the hots for that guy whose funeral she went to attend, as opposed to keeping the relationship a secret from you over how you'd be nsecure about your girlfriend hanging around the opposite sex. Just my opinion based on limited knowledge.
Then, I would recommend finding a girl who is insecure and not very attractive, to minimize the chance your insecurity will end up ruining the relationship over how half the population is males. I'd simultaneously go to therapy to learn cues to tell when you're being insecure and when it's starting to harm your relationships, so you can start training yourself to be less insecure. I'd then start learning how to form healthy relationships with women by getting to know them as persons as opposed to holes for men to stick their penises into. To help with that, I'd recommend trying to meet women who have a life as opposed to women who make you horny.
Ultimately, everyone has some things they're insecure about, me included. You'll need to find those things that are deal breakers for you. There are partners out there who would not want you to hang out with friends, or with family, over thinking that you should belong solely to them. Insecurity is a spectrum. Breaking those boundaries will result in loss of trust, but at some point you need to ask if your partner is worth compromising your mental health over, and if you're feedin unhealthy/toxic habits learned from childhood.
If you do welcome advice, my advice is for you to ditch your girlfriend because you don't trust one another.
That isn't accurate.
From what you tell me, it sounds you have no trust in her and you expect that she has the hots for that guy whose funeral she went to attend, as opposed to keeping the relationship a secret from you over how you'd be nsecure about your girlfriend hanging around the opposite sex. Just my opinion based on limited knowledge.
I mentioned this case before. That guy and I used to clash in other areas. We knew one another from common associates.
I also know my GF cheated in 2023 with some guy I met once and told her friend not to bring him around again. The reason wasn't about him railing my girl at the time. My GF doesn't know that I found out about it in 2024, though at the time my gut reaction was warning me about it, she said I was being insecure.
This word "insecure" is loosely used by naive people from what I gather. From the time a guy writes about how he thinks she's cheating, some strangers will always come out saying he's "just insecure"
Then, I would recommend finding a girl who is insecure and not very attractive, to minimize the chance your insecurity will end up ruining the relationship over how half the population is males.
I strongly advise others to distance themselves from insecure people. And I laugh at the idea of hooking up with someone I'm not attracted to.
If the sex isn't good, it won't work out. That's true for both genders.
I'd simultaneously go to therapy to learn cues to tell when you're being insecure and when it's starting to harm your relationships, so you can start training yourself to be less insecure.
I'm smarter than you.
I'll spare the rest of your post cause by now you can see it isn't worth my time to reply to it cause it's so off course.
Originally I asked if you can provide information on how to make someone love you. I did not ask for advice that downplays both my intelligence and reality.
.
Back to what I said.
For the reasons I pointed out ( and not made up) Is it really difficult to understand how going against your lady friends wishes to stay away is awkward and can damage your marriage ?
Originally I asked if you can provide information on how to make someone love you. I did not ask for advice that downplays both my intelligence and reality.
I didn't ask for advice regarding my relationship with my wife either, but you decided to impose it anyway.
It wasn't my intention to downplay your intelligence or reality.
I don't know how to make someone love you. Nobody does.
Originally I asked if you can provide information on how to make someone love you. I did not ask for advice that downplays both my intelligence and reality.I didn't ask for advice regarding my relationship with my wife either, but you decided to impose it anyway.
It wasn't my intention to downplay your intelligence or reality.
I don't know how to make someone love you. Nobody does.
Right you didn't ask, but you asked for advice and I gave it to you. Plus that type of behavior fucks with marriages which is another reason why it's a bad idea to try to uplift your female pal in the hospital over there.
Are you to become someone important in her life, but then she can't get close to you cause you're married. Bro. You might have noticed I called you a demon cause you're getting all defensive about this thing we're arguing about.
But if you want to go make your lady friends day, you'll have to violate her wishes by not respecting it and showing up on her visitors list.
And who knows, maybe it'll turn out all rosey and maybe she'll even let you in on why she's in the hospital in the first place eh ?
