Sociopath Community

Better than you wasting your time sperging down conversation.

It baffles me how some people, especially teenagers these days, have 24 in a day to waste on the Internet telling other people they're wasting their time. There are so many other things to do out there that would make them happier, that I have no idea why anyone would want to waste their time like that. Why not get a girlfriend or something, for example. But alas. It's their choice, so who am I to stick a pin in their hobbies.

“My wife is much smarter than I am. The only reason I'm not intellectually leeching off of my wife is to not dumb down her brilliance.”

this makes literally no sense! You don’t talk to your wife about intellectual stuff cos you don’t wanna “leech off her brilliance”, what kinda bullshit excuse is that?? What do you even talk about with her if you feel like you can’t share your greatest passion or what’s on your mind? 

and you sound pretty close-minded about other academics. I spent 7 months dating a university professor and met a lot of his academic friends, and when you say academics can barely hold a conversation, if you’re talking about current affairs or Love Island then you’re absolutely right, but the vast majority of them are more than happy to converse about anything intellectual even if it’s way out of their discipline. I mean, yes some of them are a little bit odd, but no offence but you also sound a bit eccentric as well so you’d probably fit right in. 

imo, you need to leave this defeatist “I’m too smart for anyone to understand me” mentality behind and try and connect on a deeper level with those around you, and be open minded about people, they could surprise you 

You seem idealistic, Gypsy.

I wouldn’t describe myself as such, but I’ll take that as a compliment 

Gypsy said: 

I wouldn’t describe myself as such, but I’ll take that as a compliment 

Perhaps I am a cynic that sees optimism and positivity as idealism, or fantasy.  I don't know.  Take it as you will.  Perhaps, I think it sounds more hopeful than logical consideration warrants, but...  I would appreciate that you are to respond at all, really.  Then yeah: a compliment, I guess.

Adventure explore curious connect open expand progress birth create reform 

Yes ma'am.

What do I talk with my wife about?

Yesterday, we agreed to sit on the bed and hate the world. If we don't hate the world, we sometimes talk about dinosaurs or other big animals or I fondle her tiddies on the bed, which makes me happy. Or we cook. I think this idea that your wife is your soulmate who can cater to all your needs is highly idealistic. I like idealists, but I still need other people. There's a good reason I abandoned idealism.

Regarding having a defeatist attitude, I don't think that's really accurate. I actively still discuss with people all the time, and have for years. It's not entirely pointless, but it is unsatisfactory. I host research discussions on a weekly basis involving people from different subfields, meet up eith academics for lunch and for coffee breaks, and indeed discuss my thoughts all the time, including with dumb dumbs. I don't discriminate at all, intellectually. There are some who are disinclined to chat, and that's fine, but the majority is unable to converse at my level, despite my best effort. It's not possible for them to keep up, and I blame people's internal framework for building their thoughts. I know it sounds incredibly arrogant, but I think I've progressed to a point that is ahead of thr large majority of people, in my internal model for thought.

Depending a bit on the subject matter, for those big questions, I feel lonely in dealing with them. It's not so much that I've decided that it's the case as it is facing the reality of the situation.

You ex, the peofessor, may have been fine with discussing with you but that doesn't mean he didn't feel alone in their thoughts. Or maybe he, like I, spent most of his discussions with women imagining them naked instead of focusing on anything intellectual. The conversation has a funny way of flowing when that happens. I think it's an interesting question, how alone we all feel in our thoughts. I think it correlates with how much you think. And I think a lot.

So you’re genuinely saying that there are no academics in the whole university you work in that can keep up with you intellectually at all? Is this the university of the south east of nowheresville, a former polytechnic that runs ads for its clearing places on its underwater ice sculpture courses? 

maybe you genuinely are an undiscovered genius that only the top 0.1% can keep up with, but honestly it sounds more likely that you struggle in social relationships and the root cause is something within you. Again, therapy. 

Why is it so difficult to digest that I feel intellectually isolated?

I haven't talked with the entire University. But to be clear I was not talking about only my University, I was talking about the international scientific network around me. I travel frequently as part of my work, so I also visit MIT, Caltech, Harvard, Princeton, Cambridge, and other name Universities at least every now and then. Not that I think the brightest minds live in the name Universities (they don't). I also network online and I have collaborators from every continent.

Most academics don't come from my background. I see value in what people can bring to the table, but intellectually I feel unsatisfied at the moment. I get paid and people value my thoughts, but what I miss is someone who can show me how horribly wrong I am, so I can be less wrong and grow as a person. Most of my intellectual achievements throughout the past years have come from introspection, while much of my technical learning comes from discussing with people, but mostly in the sense that learning and clarifying specific things is faster when there's an expert around as opposed to trying to find the relevant information online.

The underlying reason is that learning and understanding becomes easier over time when there's a solid foundation for thought. I try to teach my students how to think and approach problems, so maybe that's my solution. Cultivate people who can think better than me. That would make me happy in more than one way. But it would still be just volunteer work, and it's highly idealistic.. I feel I have a right to be a bit more selfish, I've done a lot for others already.

Why are you whining about this on a sociopath forum