Sociopath Community

I am struggling more with personally,  desire to force people,  especially people that are doing from my perspective more harm than good,  to change and start doing more good than harm instead.  but I want to stop. do you have any suggestions for how I could stop?  I feel like it would benefit myself and everyone else if I stopped

this is the cycle that I am struggling with right now,  the imperfection cycle and it goes like this-

they try to shame and guilt me for shining my light on their imperfections because they feel unable to or unwilling to change-->  then they try to accuse me of not having the answers to heal all of their problems and that if I am going to shine my light then I should have all of the answers to heal them because they go into a victim mentality-->  and then myself becomes angry and desires to force people who do more harm than good from my perspective to have to take responsibility for their behaviors and change and stop doing more harm than good-->

trying to figure out how to break the cycle such as if there is more that I can do than just accepting forgiceness of myself from God and forgiving other people and greyrock,  such as other strategies and healing methods,  because I really really want to break this cycle as soon as possible

shamanqueen said: 

from my thread on motivation and values  why would it be okay for someone who professes to be a healer to have schadenfreude ?  from my perspective healing is about helping people out of their suffering and torment,  not enjoying watching them suffering and being tormented

Most people enjoy the suffering of another, yourself included during points of catharsis. It is normal to the human condition to enjoy it, but if I don't watch myself it can get a little emotionally sadistic through teasing and sarcasm. 

I see life as art, and failure, depending on it's presentation, can be a natural comedy if it also hits on certain unexpected tones or tropes. That being said the act of it can get in the way of progress if it's not a side-enjoyment of "Tough Love" or whatever, but recognizing it can also help for relating to those who are going through it themselves. 

Through understanding our own harms and vices, we can help others with lesser expressions of the same things get through it, and in my case I was born with a fucked up perspective on Pain and Suffering with Mantras like "Smile While You Hurt". I have found catharsis laughing at my own suffering, and in turn I laugh at others' as well a bit reflexively. 

I think the laughter helps for distancing from pain empathically in the short term, making it light enough to adopt into yourself if it is not otherwise completely rebuked. In lesser forms it is Levity, the room to invite them to laugh at themselves, while in excessive forms it can become torture. 

Like legitimately, when I am in pain I start laughing, louder and louder depending on the extent of it unless it goes into horny thresholds. I also have had the idea that I need to sit and bake on bad ideas to try to work on them, so when I see others ignoring it instead it perks my attention.

It's a matter of finding the balance between concern and enjoyment when providing Shadow Work, as if I do either too much it is not good for me. A lot of it is learning certain levels of restraint, but with some people it gets increasingly difficult to be the better person in that conversation. If we are reduced to baser behaviors then all we do is confirm things to them that enable the behaviors further in the future. 

shamanqueen said: 

I am struggling more with personally,  desire to force people,  especially people that are doing from my perspective more harm than good,  to change and start doing more good than harm instead.  but I want to stop. do you have any suggestions for how I could stop?  I feel like it would benefit myself and everyone else if I stopped

Why do you figure it needs to be forced? Don't they have their entire lives to learn their lessons? 

I tend to see it as better to be a reinforcing element, a reminder of the things they won't look at, in the hopes that at a later time it will echo in their head when it is most relevant. Most people will not just do as you say, even in a position of authority, even if you have the right answers, over how someone gave that answer to them and potentially acted authoritarian with the advice. 

People have to learn it within their own Perspective, within their own POV, as just being told it tends to not translate unless they are in a cry for help mindset already looking for a way to fix things. 

Patience is hard, but people need it. 

anyway goodbye

shamanqueen said: 

anyway goodbye 

 More running huh? 

Turncoat said: 

shamanqueen said: 

anyway goodbye 

 More running huh? 

what ?  No,  I have taken into consideration your opinions and beliefs in general and specifically about my spiritual beliefs and I have found that I disagree with many of your opinions and beliefs and I think that you are very incorrect about how genuine healing and spirituality should be practiced. 

leave it for what it is,  I consider most of your beliefs about healing and spirituality to be unhealthy and toxic and harmful to yourself and to other people and promoting hate and separation consciousness.  I was going to write this before I left,  so I will just write it now and now I am leaving,  goodbye

shamanqueen said: 

Turncoat said: 

shamanqueen said: 

anyway goodbye

 More running huh? 

what ?  No,  I have taken into consideration your opinions and beliefs in general and specifically about my spiritual beliefs and I have found that I disagree with many of your opinions and beliefs and I think that you are very incorrect about how genuine healing and spirituality should be practiced. 

So rather than talk it out you just "goodbye" at it? 

leave it for what it is,  I consider most of your beliefs about healing and spirituality to be unhealthy and toxic and harmful to yourself and to other people and promoting hate and separation consciousness.  I was going to write this before I left,  so I will just write it now and now I am leaving,  goodbye

You also have many unhealthy, toxic, and self-harmful beliefs, yet you don't (typically) see me reminding you of that during your journey. 

Turncoat said: 

shamanqueen said: 

from my thread on motivation and values  why would it be okay for someone who professes to be a healer to have schadenfreude ?  from my perspective healing is about helping people out of their suffering and torment,  not enjoying watching them suffering and being tormented

Most people enjoy the suffering of another, yourself included during points of catharsis. It is normal to the human condition to enjoy it, but if I don't watch myself it can get a little emotionally sadistic through teasing and sarcasm. 

I wouldn't say most people enjoy other's suffering but people with personality diagnoses such as antisocial personality may delight in the pain of others and have little regard for others' well-being. Chronic anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem might also cause someone to seek validation in others' failures.

Did you know sadism correlates with extreme depression.