What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USAand your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever†comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
The setting is a couple years back, junior year of high school. I reluctantly walked into a relationship with this girl. Mildy attractive, no surface flaws and a lot of time on my hands reinforced my move. This girl's parent were extremely poor as I found out, often she ate once a day and that was at school. Her mother and father were crack fiends and were hardly ever home. I had a part time job and did small gestures like ordering pizza and taking her out to dinner. Within a month her parents would leave for weeks at a time and left the house to me. I put food on the table and by exploiting that alone I had basically my own house. I ate, slept, showered and fucked all in that house. I had succeded in making her completely dependant on me, I sat on my throne and things went by smoothly until I got some stomach virus. Probably from that fucking house. I stopped going over there until I got better and even then got tired of being over there. So instead of ruling that household I had her come to my house to get fucked. I had just bought battlefield 3 and was playin g the shitout of it before she snuck it out of my house and sold it for food money. I was enraged, so I plotted. When I saw her I approached her with open arms, forgiving her. She immediately offered to pay back the money, so I agreed and exaggerated the price of the game by 40 or 50 dollars. The deal was that she would payback $140, a blow job would constitute $5 and I took off $15 once for letting me fuck her in the ass. Those 3 weeks were great. I'd wake up to oj and a blowjob for most of the week. She borrowed money to pay me back, she feeling guilty had her brother buy me the game after it was all said and done. Once I had my game. I left her, but my conquest wasn't over, she seemed to value this really shitty necklace I bought her on black friday for $12. Always taking pictures on Facebook with it on. So I told her I wanted to talk things over at her house. She gave me head, and then I started recording our conversation on my phone. She broke to tears several times as I kept denying her . She offered me another blow job and cried again when I said(for recording purposes) no and she shouldn't do that. Her fate sealed and my public image set, I sent that to everyone in my contacts. I then asked her for my necklace. She refused, so I snatched it off her neck and tried to leave before she blocked the door. She said that if I left she'd say I beat her. America doesn't negotiate with terrorist and I dont barter with whores, so I moved her out of the way and headed downstairs. She yelled to her dad that I hit her. I quickly put the necklace in my shoe, and watched this crack head rush up stairs with a baseball bat. I could've killed him, he weighed 120. But I reassured him his daughter was crazy and I came over to clear things up. I showed him the 35 missed calls from her on st.paddys day as well as the drunk voicemails. Her father apologized to me, called his own daughter disgusting. Her mother made me peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and hearing her upstairs crying while being reprimanded by her father made it taste so much better. I left that house, but I had more plans. Whores travel in packs, so I went to her best friends house, fucked her that night and presented her with the necklace. I had her take a profile picture on Facebook with that necklace on. Toke it from her and sold it to the pawnshop around the corner for $3.50. Used that money to get Arnold Palmers Arizona tea and went to sleep. With her public image, emotions and her home life ruined I saw no more use in her, especially since she tried to pull a pregnancy scare on me. I made a call to child services and all they had to do was show up, that bitch got vanquished. They took her somewhere down south a couple states. She still tried to talk to me so I sent that recording to some people in the new high school she went to. She still contacts me to this day using random numbers, impersonating a girl who got the wrong number, she's asking questions scraping for information. She'll probably try to kill me one day but I hope your actually reading this because im ready for you bitch. (Racks charging handle back aggressively).
Dude, i'm gonna type as sober as possible, that honestly looks fcking pathetic and digusting compared to my meal. and I'm being one hundred percent serious. Sorry we dont cook sht that was perviously in cans. you're a fuking joke dude, and im dead fuking serious. gert areal family that cooks good food, drinks beer and wine and winecoolers and has a good fuking time, and has a milliondollar house on the beach, im seriously.. dont eever potst your fuking poverty dinner on these forums ever the fuk again bro, and by bro i mean never my bro, fuking phaggot.
hi every1 im new!!!!!!! *holds up spork* my name is katy but u can call me t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m!!!!!!!! lol...as u can see im very random!!!! thats why i came here, 2 meet random ppl like me ^_^... im 13 years old (im mature 4 my age tho!!) i like 2 watch invader zim w/ my girlfreind (im bi if u dont like it deal w/it) its our favorite tv show!!! bcuz its SOOOO random!!!! shes random 2 of course but i want 2 meet more random ppl =) like they say the more the merrier!!!! lol...neways i hope 2 make alot of freinds here so give me lots of commentses!!!! DOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <--- me bein random again ^_^ hehe...toodles!!!!! love and waffles, * ~t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m~*
Your eyes are too far apart. Nose is definitely crooked. The shape of your face is not aesthetically pleasing at all. You look like a 3/10 with make up in this photo. I don't even want to imagine what you look like without make up. I actually just threw up in my mouth, just thinking about it. Your head is too big (although that may be, because of your giraffe neck posture) . As for your hair, lol. Seriously, do something. You look like a horse. Stare at your face for more than 5 seconds, and you will see how ugly you are. The eyes which are too far apart is what ruins /damages an already ugly face even further. Unfortunately for you, that can't be surgically fixed, lol. You arms are way too long. lol at how they hang by your sides. Kind of reminds me of lurch. Don't even let me start on your pale complexion. It only works if you look hot. Unfortunately, you do not look hot. Its hard to sum up a creature like you in one word. 'UGLY ' would be unfair , since it doesn't reflect how repulsive you look. GROTESQUE is stretching it. But somewhere in between, is where you would be, on the scale of an average man. I'm sorry if my words seem a little harsh. Just so you know, I sugar coated this post as much as possible.
First of all, right, if he's a new comer, right, I want him to suck my ass with jelly. They call it "toss the salad". That's the slang word: "toss the salad". It means sucking my ass, right, with jelly or without jelly. Some people use syrup, I prefer if a guy uses jelly, right. I will reach my climate, right, I will automatically get hard right. I will, you know, come automatically if he's sucking my ass for about ten minutes alone. It's a sensation feeling and it makes you feel real good. Most all gays do that, you know what I'm saying? Like guys to suck their ass. It's just like a pussy, right, but the only different is its not a pussy, right. It's clean, the person is decent, and the person knows that that's a ass-hole but in they mind they be lookin' at it as a pussy because he's in my gym. So, toss my salad and let him eat me, you know, and we straight. That's it.
So I was driving with one of my friends, and I accidentally grabbed his leg instead of the gearstick. We both laughed and I unzipped his pants. We parked the car and I started to fondle his balls. He started laughing because he knows it's all just a joke. I started sucking his dick in the empty parking lot, and I almost choke because I'm laughing so hard. My friend is also laughing his ass off too, because this is the greatest prank ever. He starts making train noises while yelling, "BROJOB! BROJOB! CHOO CHOO!". When he cums, I swallow it like I'm some stupid phaggot. I kissed him and call him a phaggot while laughing.