Sociopath Community

I found this article (I think it was this one) for a gag for a friend who was getting divorced.

Anyway, this is precious in the way the article anthropomorphizes animals.

"[I]n similar studies, Dr. Anders Moller, a biologist at the University of Uppsala in Sweden, has found that female barn swallows likewise are very finicky about their adulterous encounters. When cheating, he said, the females invariably copulate with males endowed with slightly longer tails than those of their mates. Dr. Moller has learned that, among barn swallows, a lengthy tail appears to be evidence that the birds are resistant to parasites; this trait would be beneficial to a female's young. ''Females mated to very short-tailed males engage in these extra-marital affairs the most,'' he said. ''Short-tailed males attempt to have affairs themselves, but they're rarely successful.''

Full article here: http://www.nytimes.com/1990/08/21/science/mating-for-life-it-s-not-for-the-birds-of-the-bees.html?pagewanted=all

I really don't care. I guess it could be natural.

~Frank

Why does it  matter? If it works for you, then run with it. 

I don't off hand , know of any people that are thrilled/ happy when their partners are cheating on them...lol...if they were in agreement to an open relationship beforehand, it is not cheating....but even those relationships turn to shit very quickly from what I have seen...so...whatever works. 

Some consider 'Emotional cheating' equally damaging....which is...pffft...so...whatever

Flesh and blood is where it ends for myself. You choose what you will deal with or not. 

Know your own nature first, without questioning it. Then worry about the rest...lol...

I practice monogamy with myself. 

Monogamy sucks, I'm more attracted to polygamy or limited polyamory (4 parteners top) 

Gah, I'm extremely possessive and jealous- what's mine is mine; don't look, touch, speak or breathe near my things. I don't like sharing and i only really like focusing on one person at a time.

However I do see how this whole monogamy thing comes across as bizarre. We aren't really meant to be monogamous, we aren't geese. At most we mate and stay together "for the kids" but after that there's really no point in staying together. Serial Monogamy is a product(belief/idea) of modern life. Social Monogamy seems to have always been a thing since it doesn't make sense to limit ourselves to one partner and there's (gosh this is gonna sound sexist) the thing about men having that urge to spread their "seed" and such which is just their basic need to make sure their  geneline survives. *I say men but I know women cheat too but its less risky for men- kinda.

 I was once told that if I wanted to keep a relationship that I would have to accept that they would be fucking other people, but emotionally not bonding with them. That didn't sit well with me, I'm a monogamist and possessive but the minute I see my person returning interest to someone else I tend to shut them out and push them away.

"What are your thoughts? Do you believe it is natural?"

I do, otherwise long-lasting, emotional bonds wouldn't be within our human nature to begin with. Desire is naturally there too, it's what fuels the initial emotional bond in the first place, it just doesn't go away for some. I think both options are natural, but monogamy more so than the bachelor lifestyle. I hardly put any emphasis on sex, a long lasting friend is far more valuable in my eyes than an that.

"Are you comfortable with it?"

It's my preference and I wouldn't enter into relationship if I knew it wouldn't last for a long time.

"Once I found an article that argues that divorce and remarriage is the most natural thing for humans, as opposed to being polyamorous/polygamist or faithful to one partner for life. Divorce has of course become more acceptable over time. Could it be that humans are becoming more anchored to their natural inclinations?"

I think we just have too much time on our hands and are used to getting what we want.  We're more inclined to dive into desires because that's what we're used to, the farther you go back in history there was obviously less luxury. I'd also say our culture promotes polygamy and entices temptations more so than any generation before us.

I think however that your nurture has a lot more to do with your relationship preference than nature. Everyone wants what they can't have and this is really no different. I'd say someone's preference in this case is mostly dictated by what issues they're looking to compensate for.

I think I prefer relaxed polygamy. My ideal lifestyle is to be able to have a number of fwbs, and that's basically it for romance. If never been in a relationship with someone that I haven't wanted to end 1-3 months later.