Sociopath Community

I highly doubt that, but you're welcome to brag about it with further details. 

I would rather not. I need to get my story strait first and separate my emotions from the whole ordeal. the lowest point is relative of course and everyone will have there own definition, so the lowest point from my prospective is different from another persons. I will say that I had been five days with almost no water, and no food at all. I was also very close to hypothermia.

through videos of unfortunate people showcasing their suffering. The delusional ones are the best

do you have any examples, that sounds interesting

Honestly though, it'd be so nice if I didn't have to worry about it.

you don't have too worry about it if you don't want to. Like you said pain and suffering are the truest form of human expression. If you want too you could easily murder someone. The odds of you getting caught for a motiveless killing of a stranger are very very low.

mortalitas stated: source post

I had the joy of experiencing the lowest a human can get(probably)

I highly doubt that, but you're welcome to brag about it with further details. 
 

So you are a sadist but you suppress it or are you not really a sadist?

The former, and I try to anyway. Looking like you're getting your jollies from another's misery has a way of painting you as a jerk. Repressing it however seems to make it stronger.

...it's just so much more entertaining than most things, but it's a PR nightmare to not keep it under some level of control. I try to proxy it through this place and through videos of unfortunate people showcasing their suffering. The delusional ones are the best.

Honestly though, it'd be so nice if I didn't have to worry about it. Pain and suffering are so much more honest and vibrant than other forms of expression. Whether it's my own or another person's, it's just so... real, and beautiful.

JimSavage stated: source post

TheCrowOnTheFence stated: source post

I could dress him up like a cute little geisha and make him strip.  He says he'd be too embarrassed, but I'll just hit him with the crop every time he stops.

(This is actually sounding like a better and better idea, the more I think about it.  But it definitely needs an audience.  I cordially invite you to our humble home, Jimothy. : D )

Aw shit, I knew we could count on you to be fun and cool crow! will be in chiraq soon :D

We don't live in Chicago anymore.  We're in Bangkok. : /

That's my understanding of it anyway. When I see others in pain, a part of me enjoys the expression for the expression's sake (association and emotional sadism), but I also find myself imagining what it must feel like in a positive light (empathy?). I don't really fully understand what pain is for other people, so when relating I'm stuck with my own abnormal response despite logically understanding otherwise (seeing it does has me squirm in a pleasured sense). I think the largest part of it is lacking a relation to it that'd serve to stigmatize the gesture.

What do you mean by separating them?

Turncoat stated: source post

My understanding of pain is flawed from my perception of it being "good", so seeing others in pain I sympathize with incorrectly.

So your sadism is actually a perverted form of empathy? Can you separate them emotionally from each other?

Do people actually feel pain or do they just love to be whiney bitches? 

Inquirer stated: source post

Separation as in if you could 'feel' a difference between a normal empathetic response and when you see someone in pain.

What are you meaning when you say a "normal empathetic response"? Assuming I'm getting what you mean, in most ways I'm pretty disconnected from others feelings beyond a logical studied sense of it, but physical suggestions like Eye Scream still affect me.
 

Also, do you enjoy all forms and intensities of pain (both sadistically and masochistically) or do you have any boundaries?

For masochism I fear losing functionality of a body part, but that's an "in my own head" sort of thing. The sensation itself is still good, but the combo of physical joy and emotional fear of that sort is somewhat disturbing. As Crow and others before her have stated to me, my noises when I'm in pain don't sound too far off from the sorts of sounds I'm prone to making during a deep massage or sex. The best way to describe it is that pain is like a sharper variant of that sort of pleasure, sort of like comparing different cheeses. As for volume, how loud the pain itself is, while my reflexes can annoyingly get in the way of letting me enjoy it, I haven't found my limits yet. This sort of thing has given me an increased appreciation for restraints (that and how pretty it is, plus the resistance that shows when there's a struggle).

For sadism... things like Eye Scream or watching someone be kicked in the nuts is the closest I can imagine to a boundary. I haven't had too many experiences where I've been the direct cause of another's physical suffering, but for those times where I have it's been both a rush of power and a tickle of the mind, a sensation that's hard to resist continuing to feed once it starts. Emotional suffering is like a subtler form with more room for variation for it's flavors, more decadent than visceral.

Turncoat stated: source post

What are you meaning when you say a "normal empathetic response"? Assuming I'm getting what you mean, in most ways I'm pretty disconnected from others feelings beyond a studied sense of it, but physical suggestions like Eye Scream still affect me.

If you do not have empathy in the regular sense (and your flawed perception of pain on top of it) I suppose the question is kind of moot.

Turncoat stated: source post

For masochism I fear losing functionality of a body part, but that's an "in my own head" sort of thing. The sensation itself is still good, but the combo of physical joy and emotional fear is somewhat disturbing. As Crow and others before her have stated to me, my noises when I'm in pain don't sound too far off from the sorts of sounds I'm prone to making during a deep massage or sex. The best way to describe it is that pain is like a sharper variant of that sort of pleasure, sort of like comparing different cheeses.

For sadism... things like Eye Scream or watching someone be kicked in the nuts is the closest I can imagine to a boundary. I haven't had too many experiences where I've been the direct cause of another's physical suffering, but for those times where I have it's been both a rush of power and a tickle of the mind. Emotional suffering is like a subtler form with more room for variation for it's flavors, more decadent than visceral.

If you had the opportunity to torture people (think medieval torture dungeons and too much free time) would that interest you? Would it disgust you?

Physical pain is pleasurable to you, yet you seem to enjoy other peoples' emotional/psychological suffering more. Why go for the subtler form (as you state) when you can have something raw and more powerful?

Separation as in if you could 'feel' a difference between a normal empathetic response and when you see someone in pain.

Also, do you enjoy all forms and intensities of pain (both sadistically and masochistically) or do you have any boundaries?

But I'd look awful like that. I get the whole dressing me up like a chick thing, but why Geisha?

I think it must tie into said 'dressing up like like a girl thing' directly, because the stereotypical geisha is like a symbol of femininity (to me at least). So its like even more girly than just a skirt and blouse.