I guess it paints the picture that there is nothing wrong with you. Makes it sound like the relationship is falling apart solely because of the other person. I've said that too, people don't like to hear it.
by BodhiI guess it paints the picture that there is nothing wrong with you. Makes it sound like the relationship is falling apart solely because of the other person. I've said that too, people don't like to hear it.
It doesn't paint the picture- it is exactly what the person is meaning, and anyone who uses that phrase (which is a form of devaluing), is just as screwed up if not more because they have not the capacity for introspection, or to take responsibility for their own actions. Of course "people" don't like to hear it because that is the kick-in-the-head moment when they realize just how fucked the person they are with really is, and that they are not someone who will be bettering themselves anytime soon.
Make no mistake- if you are in a relationship with a screwed up person... you are a screwed up person. Stable/healthy people, very rarely end up with unstable/unhealthy people. It's more common to seek out that which is familiar to you.
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/6786486?cps=gravity_3967_7398086229974473110
I laughed at some of these. People are so rude but honesty is key.
Ever been in a relationship where you knew you wouldn't last due to what someone else said? Or have you been the one to say something that destroys the relationship?
OK... let's say you are in a situation where the other person is the unstable one and is acting out in ways that is destroying the relationship. Say you do care about them and you feel that it's worth saving, but that person getting help is the only way to change this destruction. It's never a good idea to make the person you care about feel as though there is something "wrong" with them, and nothing "wrong with you. It is a much better approach if you leave out blame and finger pointing- and say that you really care about this relationship. So much that you are willing for both of you to go seek professional help together, so that you both can figure out what is going wrong in the relationship, and what can be done, if anything, to change that.
This way you are allowing a professional to take over and be the one to gently approach this person with what they see as the problem.
"Because according to you, telling them to seek therapy to figure out what's wrong with them is a no."
LOL. That is not what I said and you know it. :)
Because the way you ended up describing the relationship at the end of your reason for using that same phrase, tells me everything I need to know about what your intentions were. I'm sure you really do think there is nothing wrong with you, Miss Comes to a Sociopath Forum, for what exactly? You used the phrase because you thought yourself superior, and you wanted them to feel like they were worthless. Which is how anyone who says it in the way listed on that site means to use it. I've read enough of your comments here, and you don't strike me as the kind of person who genuinely wants others to get the help they need. But thanks for trying. lol