by Easthetics
Nah I am actually.
Well, these are the reasons why I don't believe you're a sociopath:
I hate that i'm in it for something, and not just the love.
I wish I could be a normal person that cares for others.
Everyone's a sinner
Maybe it's just guilt that I wish I had.
It's fear, rather than guilt. Fear of the repercussions of my actions
And this is why I believe you're depressed:
Truth is it all makes me really miserable.
There's nothing to cling to in life because there's nothing that has meaning.
Fear of dying alone.
This is another aspect of my life I hate, the feeling of powerlessness. It makes me feel weak.
While AsPD and depression can coexist, I would still be very surprised if anyone diagnosed you with AsPD because you really do not come across as someone who has it. Then again, you could have AsPD I suppose, but certainly not psychopathy, particularly for the first reasons I mentioned above (your own responses that I quoted). That is not the mindset of a psychopath.
In my opinion, you just sound like an average person who has a lot of regrets, is miserable with the way his life is going and wants to change it so that he can be more giving, caring and loving.
You obviously want to be loved. That seems to be what's causing such a void in your life at the moment.