As Turncoat wrestled to say a name, he could only muster vowels of fear.
Soon after, time was up and a bullet entered his brain.
As the dust cleared from the blast, it was soon apparent that there were no survivors.
-Fin-
"How is it sad to be wired in such a way that I can cum in 3 minutes flat and hit multiples within 2 hours with repetetive stimulation?"
Buildup, edging, and passion are what makes sex good, not just mere orgasm. The strength of it's what counts more than the number. Merely getting off's easy, getting off in a mind blowing way takes effort and patience. Kink is a great way to make for buildup in the form of enhanced foreplay, if not spicing up the sex itself.
Why go for an easy answer when you can go for an amazing one worth reflecting on? Without doing it right an orgasm can be almost as disappointing as not getting off at all. Sex is boring without something that shows your partner isn't just some nobody.
Not for me. Once I get past the first one, the rest keep getting better, up until # 5 or 6. I usually hit 2 more little ones and then a really big one. That one usually exhausts me and leaves me too chafed to enjoy it anymore.
I'm hypersensitive. My mind generates all kinds of neat stuff with or without a partner.
I've orgasmed in my sleep without any external stimulation at all.
Hence my lackadaisical attitude toward relationships.
"Mind games and drama don't appeal to me much now."
...that's so sad that you'd call foreplay and edging "mind games", at least in a fashion you can be dismissive over. That's like claiming fast food's just as tasty as a delicious home cooked meal.
"I'm a feeler, remember?"
The best sex I've had tend to come from "feelers". The sadist I was once with becomes quite vibrant and maniacal at the sight of blood, and seeing pain cause an orgasmic expression pushed her further. Hers wasn't the byproduct of thought or pretend, it felt natural to her, and her expressions made for a hedonistic feedback loop.
"Too much mental shit leaves me tired and headachey, especially if there's no point."
Huh, I figured you were mentally stronger than that. How unfortunate.
"I'll see it through if there's a point, but it's too much like work for me. Thinking is for school or work that I'm getting paid for. I like mindless stimulation to get off."
Simple minds, simple pleasures I guess. Sex to me is art, and when pushed far enough the profound sense of awe is almost out of body. Each scar I have is a pleasant reminder of what once was, at points allowing my imagination to feel how it once felt.
To have sex be mindless is a crime to me, a waste of time. There's no point if it's not memorable, and if I'm having to imagine things to get off that likely means my partner is terrible.
"The costumes and roleplaying are just window dressing for my partner's amusement."
Costumes and roleplaying can get pretty weird. I prefer BDSM since being broken in enhances the experience for me. Playing "pretend" tends to be half-hearted instead of raw and painful like I prefer.
"So while I'm having sex, my mind is adding up my household bills, remembering hot scenes from movies, going back over the last 10 or so really good partners I had, rehearsing how the fuck I'm going to leave afterward without being rude."
I have the same sort of deal, it's actually what lead to me seeking something more. I love sex when it's done strongly enough since it can clear my head of those sorts of distracting ruminations, at least for the moment. It's also an amazing outlet for any pent up stress I might be carrying, plus the headspace and harm when done in certain ways has me relax my muscles and mind in ways comparable to a proper massage.
I clench a lot of strain into my shoulders and neck from an inability to turn my brain off. 
"Sometimes I'll visialize dreamscapes that are purely imagined."
That's the sort of thing I can't make stop except with the proper "incentive" or excessive focus. Without taking steps I can become reduced to scatterbrained nonsense. Thankfully focus comes much more easily now.
"It's like trying to use a boomerang as a spear."
That sounds pretty amusing actually, in a voyeur sense anyway. Are they allowed to attach stuff to it, or is it purely appropriating one weapon type as if it were another?
"So yeah, hyperfocussing on somebody else's sexual fantasy is like work. I don't do it for just anybody."
I believe that when it's the right pairing it no longer feels like work, but instead feels like experiencing. It's mind blowing when both people's needs click to the point of questioning how it's even possible. When the needs don't click properly, it can be as awkward or bad as two bottoms trying to make it work without discussing their tendencies in advance.
I tend to seek people out who have an untapped need, then test if what I like is what they're missing. It often doesn't work out, but when it does it makes the effort it took worth the time spent.
"Strange that you would see a desire to not waste my strength on frivolities like sex as a weakness. I thought you were more flexible than that."
You call it "wasting strength" and refer to it as exhausting, causing headaches and the like. That means it is literally weakening you.
Sex to me is art, and seeing someone paint the canvas one color does not impress me.
"Money is worth working for. My kids are worth working for. Learning another language, a satisfying mission to build homes for flood victims, studying to build a career is worth working for."
What does other things that are worth working for have to do with making sex better than it could otherwise be? I enjoy more than just sex, and enjoying other things does not take away from it.
"Sex just isn't that important to me. Especially since mindblowing orgasms come easy to me."
Do you even form any memories worth holding onto that way though?
"You're wired how you're wired and you need all that stuff to get the sensory experience. It's good that you've turned it into a positive instead of a curse."
No kidding, I used to hate this trait, but even without it I'd likely still enjoy things like foreplay.
"But we're not all you. I cum hard and long and hit multiple orgasms with minimal stimulation."
Of course, but I can still see someone taking half-steps as a shame in the sense of seeing them as missing out on something wonderful. I never said you had to agree with me.
"If anything, overthinking it lessens the experience."
That's where we differ: I don't see it as overthinking. The partners I've had tend to go into it almost as if possessed as opposed to it stressing their minds, losing themselves to the freedom of a mixed outlet.
"Like I said, it's like being asked to sing and dance for my meal. I only bother if my partner's special enough to deserve the entertainment. And it certainly doesn't make my food taste any better."
Sentimental value does have some importance, doesn't it? Something earned carries more weight than something given.