Sociopath Community

by Reaper

 

by Claire

 You'll 'let them think' as in, you will mislead them to think you are loyal when you are not? Would you swear on your loyalty, if you were disloyal?

Yes, my loyalty is merely an illusion to keep them useful to me. 

Would I swear on it? Sure, but it won't be genuine.

 

 Alright, so this applies to both long term and short term relationships with people? After somebody has remained useful for say 5 years, 10 years. I take it you don't have much belief in god or take too much pride in 'doing the right thing'. Is that accurate?

It seems the only reason someone wouldn't be loyal to someone loyal in return, is a lack of self-control, or lack of concern about their character....

by Claire

 Alright, so this applies to both long term and short term relationships with people? After somebody has remained useful for say 5 years, 10 years. I take it you don't have much belief in god or take too much pride in 'doing the right thing'. Is that accurate?

 I don't have any belief in god and I don't give two shits about 'doing the right thing'. To me, the 'right thing' is whatever I can get away with.

Loyalty is just a manipulative tool.

I know I can remain faithful until I'm crossed. I do have a moral code stuck in my mind at all times. 

I don't see why pull on their hair for no reason. It has to be a big enough reason for me to turn the other way.

by Hayasa

I know I can remain faithful until I'm crossed. I do have a moral code stuck in my mind at all times. 

I don't see why pull on their hair for no reason. It has to be a big enough reason for me to turn the other way.

 Are you a socio Hayasa? How long have you remained faithful? 

For me it's like, if you keep making mistakes, I don't want you in my life. Next. If you are interested in fixing the problems, then ok, lets keep trying.  If you can treat me well and both of us are interested in making it work, then I'll give you my loyalty. 

Response changed.

Disregard previous.,

Sounds like you have a somewhat muddled notion of 'loyalty', Claire, misinterpreting it as 'faithfulness in relationships' or something like that.

Loyalty is sticking by someone's side, no matter what - even if the person commits something unspeakably despicable. Loyalty involves overriding (or even betraying) your own principles in favour of someone else. (I have max. 4-5 people in my life i'd do that for, including  blood-relations (kids + sibling).

by Claire

  What about people who are loyal to you? Why don't you see reason in being loyal in return? 

 Being loyal in return is simply wrong. It's not a trade with mutual obligations. If someone chooses to be loyal to you, it's their own private personal choice - nothing to do with you. You may not even like having their loyalty to you.  Their voluntary loyalty does not entitle them to expect your loyalty in return.  

It's like if someone is in love with you and expects (demands!) you to love them back, even if you wouldn't touch them with a ten foot pole -  you see how wrong is that.

I've got BPD tendencies.

Figures, then. Sounds like you're justifying your codependency issues, no?

It seems the only reason someone wouldn't be loyal to someone loyal in return, is (...)  lack of concern about their character....

Yes, and why do you expect the person to be concerned about your character?  Just because you're concerned with theirs?

Loyalty is whatever I decide it means to me..

Nope, not a sociopath. I just am loyal at my own accord. If they are mean to me, I don't see why stick.

I remain faithful and loyal as long as we have mutual respect. I guess I am not that disturbed if they fuck up many times unless they prove they aren't friend-material. I am loyal even if the ties are gone, generally, because I don't really try to stab them through the heart if they're not my friends anymore. Then again, even if we're not friends, there is a level of respect going on. Imagined or real.

There are some exceptions, though. :D

by wooster

Sounds like you have a somewhat muddled notion of 'loyalty', Claire, misinterpreting it as 'faithfulness in relationships' or something like that.

Loyalty is sticking by someone's side, no matter what - even if the person commits something unspeakably despicable. Loyalty involves overriding (or even betraying) your own principles in favour of someone else. (I have max. 4-5 people in my life i'd do that for, including  blood-relations (kids + sibling).

My notion of loyalty for relationships with a partner includes faithfulness as well as sticking by someone's side. If sexual exclusivity is part of an agreed upon aspect of our relationship, then I see betraying this condition as betraying my loyalty to that person. Do you disagree with that? 

Right, so if you are "betraying your own principles in favor of someone else", then part of loyalty to a partner would mean adopting their principal of faithfulness, if that is important to that person. 

Perhaps I was not clear enough. I wasn't talking about loyalty to someone who "may not even like having their loyalty to you". When someone demands loyalty and respect, and the partner then gives this loyalty, there is a mutual agreement that this is a condition of the relationship. It is not voluntarily given, it is under the expectations that loyalty will be returned.