You think I am delusional because of the amount of power and control I claim to have, but you haven't proven that I don't have it. All you've done is shown that you agree with amanita's view of my situation, which is inaccurate and I'll explain why in response to his/her comment:
Control is power, yet you admit to an abject lack of it, because you are unable to master your obsessions and compulsions. Knowledge is power, yet you continue to display a lack of it, in every major area, from science to culture to philosophy. "Being a a leader" is power, yet the only person you are "leading" is your 15 yr old daughter, who doesn't respect your authority anyway, given that she was diagnosed with ODD. Influence is power, but you cannot even manage to exert it within your own family, community or workplace, as evidenced by your refusal to participate meaningfully within these spheres of your life. Choice is power, but you've admitted to being an unemployed, middle-aged, single mom on welfare, which, quite frankly, severely limits your "choices" in several important areas.
If I couldn't master my obsessions and compulsions I'd be rotting in a prison cell by now because, even though there are some situations where I did act on impulse in the past, I've learnt what those situations are and can control myself enough to avoid them.
If I displayed a lack of knowledge in every major area of my life, as amanita claimed, I seriously doubt I would be able to home-school my daughter. Considering I am home-schooling my daughter and she is doing quite well at it, I'd say my knowledge is sufficient.
As a parent, I am an authority figure whether my daughter respects my authority or not. ODD is a childhood disorder which my daughter grew out of. Though she's a typical teenager (all teenagers defy their parents at some point when they start discovering their own independence), she's not as defiant anymore as she was when she was younger.
I have already proven my leadership abilities to those I lead in a number of different situations in the past that required group leadership.
I have the power to choose to remain in the situation I am in or to not be in it. I could go out and get a job, but why be a slave to a job I may not even enjoy when I can have more freedom and get paid for doing what I prefer to do instead. I may not get as much money as someone working full time, but I own everything I have and I'm not behind on any bills. The amount of money I am getting has been sufficient so far.
I believe most people would choose my lifestyle if they could get as much money as they are currently getting in a full time job, without having to work for it.
As for my 'intention' of stealing, murdering and eating a baby... There was no actual intent as such. We (the guy I shared the desire with at the time) simply discussed how we would do it if we had the opportunity to do it and get away with it. As it was, neither of us had the money to fly to each other, let alone China where we figured we'd have a greater chance of getting away with it.