by whoameyeMy dark lady, Edvard is the shit on soles of mankind's shoes. He is not worth the time or effort. Just drag him threw the grass and he will disapper.
Hahaha, did you just bitch about me to your "lady"? Not very manly, pal. Here are 2 points for not using the pedo comeback again though.
On bullying:
Bullying and the insecurities revolving around it are pretty interesting.
I've mentioned it a couple of times but I was bullied when I was in first grade by some of the bigger kids from my neighborhood. There was this mean kid who hanged out with most of my friends and got them to bully me as well, never did anything about it. Anyway, I became a bully later on and pretty much repeated the same things that were done to me.
Before I continue, I want to say that there are different types of bullying and I am talking from personal experience only.
I targeted mostly just one person with my bullying (I've apologized to him later on and we're actually pretty good friends nowadays). From experience, I can say it would have been a bad idea to push back. Bullying isn't just physical, it has a lot to do with mental torture as well. The victim is usually isolated from the group and standing up to the bully isn't scary only because the bully seems stronger than you but also because he's often more popular than you.
I was born in the beginning of the year, like most bullies (and ice-hockey players and Edvard I guess). That means that when I was in first grade I was a year older than the youngest kid and so I was on average bigger and stronger than most in my class. The kid I bullied couldn't have stood up to the bullying by physical means and he never really stood up to me properly. There were two things that I was doing consciously to stop him from standing up. The first one was letting him be a part of the group, if just to get bullied by us. Second was to make sure he had it better than he could have. What I mean is that I wanted to make sure he thought I was more capable of harming him than I actually was. That was in order to make him feel inferior.
He never told his parents or the teachers because he would have been excluded from the group and he never tried to stand up because he was afraid of what might happen.
Thinking back, the proper way he could have dealt with the situation would have been to talk to me in private, or talk to each of my friends in private. When I was with a group the group mentality dictated that he was inferior, but I was always fairly nice to him when nobody else was around -- as were everyone else. If he had told me that bullying bothers him in private then I probably would have stopped, as weird as it sounds.
If he had told each of my friends that me bullying him bothered him then I wouldn't have had as much incentive to bully, especially if some of my friends had talked to me. The problem with talking to me directly would have been that he would've still been inferior to me -- not only would he never have beat me but he also would have owed me for letting him in to the group.
Anyway, I'm not proud of what I did and I've tried my best to make up for it.
On debating:
I might add something here
by LeggaThinking back, the proper way he could have dealt with the situation would have been to talk to me in private, or talk to each of my friends in private. When I was with a group the group mentality dictated that he was inferior, but I was always fairly nice to him when nobody else was around -- as were everyone else. If he had told me that bullying bothers him in private then I probably would have stopped, as weird as it sounds.
lol. What a bunch of bullshit.
If he was as genuinely inferior to you as you claimed, you would have bullied him in private too, since you've indicated that his 'inferiority' is your reason for bullying him. The only reason you were nice to him in private is because you didn't have your friends around. You knew that if he attacked you in private there would be no-one there to back you up and this is precisely what makes you a coward.
Bullies are almost always cowards. He wasn't inferior to anyone except in his own imagination. The reason most people did not bully him in private was because there was no audience and no incentive, and no group mentality to dictate roles for each kid. In a one-to-one interaction the only thing that could have broken the boundary between being nice and being a bully would have been trying to step up in the hierarchy.
You probably realize that I'm not undermining your arguments or trying to make mockey of the article you posted. I stated very early in my post that I am speaking about one case of bullying and that there exists different type of bullying. I know there are cases where the bully has been beaten up by the bullied. There are also cases where the bully is bigger and stronger than the bullied, and in these cases the bullied would not beat up the bully even if he tried.
I'd love to continue the discussion and contribute more to the topic, since I find this whole thing really interesting, but I'm not going to do that if this discussion turns into a flame fest. Also, there's very little I can say about my own personal experience if the starting assumption is that I'm lying. Instead of listening to me you could always take your time and tell about your own encounters with bullying.