Can you be charmed? I can be I think. Some people are very charming, girls and so on. Some people however who other people probably think are charming, are boring to me. I don't dislike them but I get bored by listening to them. I kinda know what they are going to say or I just don't see their charm. Thought about this just now when I saw some famous people being interviewed on Youtube.
Ok, I do also like charming people. But then I mean for instance some girl I interact with who I think is charming. I don't think most people I interact with are charming however. Either it is because they aren't charming, they don't try to charm me or I just don't see their charm.
Ok, I can be influenced by people but it's usually not because of charm and doesn't happen very often. I like when people try to influence me like salespersons and so on. I listen a long time to what they have to say, ask questions and then say I need to think about it and will come back when I've decided. I never do...
I don't see being unrefined, crude or burly necessarily means lacking charm. I am that way often but still very polite when dealing with most people. Also, clothing and so on doesn't really matter. Of course it helps but isn't necessary, at least not for me. That quote about a "motherfucking charming pig" from Pulp Fiction fits. I often dress so I like a some kind of...I was gonna write "low life" but I won't. Some kind of crook perhaps or even street person. This is also because my income isn't very high and my situation. Still people most of the time trust me completely. I have done many things I shouldn't have been able to do. Usually nothing bad. Only that people don't see me as someone who would defraud them.
I myself see some people who dislike me (for no reason) as charmless and also unresponsive to charm. It's people I can't get to like me. Some (very few) of these people have had positions which meant they could cause me trouble. People who can't be handled easily are very "dangerous" or just annoying.
You think appearing like a "low life" from clothing is enough to fit what I am talking about for negative charm factors? What about tooth decay? Body weight around or over 400? Having not taken a shower in years? Nails uncut and curling? Excessive skin sores that show disease and past picking of the skin? Maybe even a couch they've fused to operating as a wingman?
Even an outwardly accepting individual has an inner bias unless they worked that hard not to, or were born unable to tell the difference in the first place.
Also, "Burly" can be charming from an aloof appearance and visible strength. I wasn't referring to that sort of thing.
Edit: Lets add "excessively rude, ill tempered, and extremely boring" to the list to cover personality.
by StormI myself see some people who dislike me (for no reason) as charmless and also unresponsive to charm. It's people I can't get to like me. Some (very few) of these people have had positions which meant they could cause me trouble. People who can't be handled easily are very "dangerous" or just annoying.
That statement is begging to be picked apart.
How do we really know that they disliked you "for no reason" based on being "unresponsive to charm"?
I don't look disgusting but according to myself I don't look very trustworthy either, when it comes to clothing and so on. Also the not showering thing... This is something I shouldn't write about but I did like Steve Jobs for a while and showered very little. It didn't change anything how people acted towards me or how I was treated.
But I have heard this from two different people on two different occasions many years apart. It was that their very first impression when they just saw me was that I was disturbed in some way, and when I started talking that impression evaporated completely. One of those people last time I spoke to her said that "I'm the best person in the world". She's also treated me very well, given me stuff and so on but I've also done things for her.