You talking about people with just mainly dissocial personality disorder being in a majority of the parts of special forces units Edvard? James Fallon works with the tier 1 groups in working out ways to analyze the perfect soldier. The complete ignorance of people that believe special forces is composed of normal people like themselves is livid when a big part of your genetics plays into this role.
by Spatial MindEdvard stands for those who made attempts to intimidate and humiliate me. When bullies fail to get what they want from their targets, the face of their insecurities begins to surface, and they go into overdrive. If I were to run away damaged, they would laugh and rejoice at what they would claim as success, just like they have done to others before and after me. Their complaints about me revolve around the beds they've made, as though I'm giving them a time for no reason. Edvard in particular likes to run around fulling peoples heads with false ideas about me. Do a search on the name Tony, and 99% of what you'll find is Edvard saying nasty things about me to others. I know Edvard doesn't like the truth, but that doesn't prevent me from giving him a dose of it, even though he won't accept what I have to say. Instead he gets furious. Do I really think Edvard is petty, a tool and needs to man up and evolve ? Of course I do, I'm not exactly turning a blind eye to what Ed has managed to establish for himself with how he carries on. Emily, these things that happen between others, are things that must play out. We're here in this world for the sake of experience. Edvard is fortunate enough to be in my care, so he'll always be excused and forgiven for his shortcomings.
Dear Spatial: These reactions are due to unresolved conflicts or misunderstanding between you and Edvard, which are usually mutual. I saw on the ROLL CALL thread that although Edvard came out apologized and resolved the issue with using Secret Admirer (and explained that the other confusion with Wet For Edvard was a "tasteless joke")
that you still had issues with him from your own assessment of him.
So both Gentlemen would have to agree to let go of judgment of each other to stop the mutual backbiting.
Spatial I don't know if you are Christian, but the main difference is that believers in forgiveness end up doing the forgiving and apologizing first when there is a deadlock. And trust that the other person will follow.
Edvard did apologize for causing trouble to people over the use of names and whatever that entailed.
So he showed he is willing to admit and acknowledge his part in conflicts.
Nobody is perfect, we all know that. The point is not to overlook flaws or deny them/pretend they don't exist. But not to hang people over them when they offer positive contributions to the forum that are better focused on.
Both you and Edvard offer more positives than negatives.
And it is natural that people suspect and accuse me or you or anyone who comes across as we do. If we can forgive that problem which happens on all forums, especially this one where there is greater distrust of motives.
Can we focus on the more productive/effective sides of people here, help overcome the flaws where they do exist without judging each other personally for them, and try to forgive whatever past misjudgments were passed on you and Edvard and others.
Thanks. And I hope we can keep Edvard here who was more worried about his IP address than about you or me.
by emilynghiemby Spatial MindEdvard stands for those who made attempts to intimidate and humiliate me. When bullies fail to get what they want from their targets, the face of their insecurities begins to surface, and they go into overdrive. If I were to run away damaged, they would laugh and rejoice at what they would claim as success, just like they have done to others before and after me. Their complaints about me revolve around the beds they've made, as though I'm giving them a time for no reason. Edvard in particular likes to run around fulling peoples heads with false ideas about me. Do a search on the name Tony, and 99% of what you'll find is Edvard saying nasty things about me to others. I know Edvard doesn't like the truth, but that doesn't prevent me from giving him a dose of it, even though he won't accept what I have to say. Instead he gets furious. Do I really think Edvard is petty, a tool and needs to man up and evolve ? Of course I do, I'm not exactly turning a blind eye to what Ed has managed to establish for himself with how he carries on. Emily, these things that happen between others, are things that must play out. We're here in this world for the sake of experience. Edvard is fortunate enough to be in my care, so he'll always be excused and forgiven for his shortcomings.
Dear Spatial: These reactions are due to unresolved conflicts or misunderstanding between you and Edvard, which are usually mutual.
In this thread you posed the question, "So why Tony and Edvard have issues with each other, I'm not sure." What I wrote there is not a reaction, but a brief response to your enquiry.
I saw on the ROLL CALL thread that although Edvard came out apologized and resolved the issue with using Secret Admirer (and explained that the other confusion with Wet For Edvard was a "tasteless joke")
that you still had issues with him from your own assessment of him.
My interrogation of Edvard has more to do with his history and his nature to deceive others into his belief systems. It intrigued me how he said he was sure WFE and Secret Admirer are the same person, before admitting to actually being SA. Whether he is or not wouldn't set the standard of how things are between us. Me still having issues with him ? Sure, other reasons do exist.
So both Gentlemen would have to agree to let go of judgment of each other to stop the mutual backbiting.
Spatial I don't know if you are Christian, but the main difference is that believers in forgiveness end up doing the forgiving and apologizing first when there is a deadlock. And trust that the other person will follow.
I've apologized and made things right with him by being flexible quite a bit. It's in his better interest to abuse that, in favour of who he serves. Though I think he needs to be fixed, I'm not angry at Ed, and when the time comes I announce forgiveness. I do take from his various hate threads and apply it to him wherever we make contact. Just as you feel your intervention sets the record straight, I feel the same about what I do to/for Edvard, otherwise he'll just continue his poor behaviour. For me to provide zero consequence I think is inhumane. My choice of weapons is the truth, and descriptions of my adversary's own reflection, and yes I am at times aggressive about it. The result is indeed brutal. Some will say I'm being dramatic, others will suggest I'm being cold and bitter. I assure you, the uncountable times I've written about this, no one tries to correct what I say, I think because no one knows the fine details.
Edvard did apologize for causing trouble to people over the use of names and whatever that entailed.
So he showed he is willing to admit and acknowledge his part in conflicts.
Often do I remind him of open doors, and like I've said many times and even recently, I am the best friend he has around here. Unfortunately he's proven to be extremely hard wired.
Nobody is perfect, we all know that. The point is not to overlook flaws or deny them/pretend they don't exist. But not to hang people over them when they offer positive contributions to the forum that are better focused on.
For clarity, I did not hang Ed over his positive contributions. I did not attack him for coming clean or apologizing. Sure I'm not perfect either, and when I do attack, it's very rare. Not good enough, but on a human scale, Am I not fantastic ?
Both you and Edvard offer more positives than negatives.
And it is natural that people suspect and accuse me or you or anyone who comes across as we do. If we can forgive that problem which happens on all forums, especially this one where there is greater distrust of motives.
Yeah.
Can we focus on the more productive/effective sides of people here, help overcome the flaws where they do exist without judging each other personally for them, and try to forgive whatever past misjudgments were passed on you and Edvard and others.
I know you want to help. But do you not see your own initiative as judgemental ?
Like I said before. We must let things play out, Emily. Sure we can see and we can be told, but nothing beats experiencing it first hand. That is why we were put here. Those who never had the chance for conflict, I'd imagine are lacking in spiritual growth, and will not be equipped to resolve issues on their own. The parent who does not discipline their child usually ends up developing spoiled offspring, where as the fine example of a humanitarian had strict parents. Sometimes is goes pretty far, and we end up doing more dramatic things for the greater good, sometimes they call this tough love.
I've been in that place where I would see if Ed would improve his behaviour on his own, and my perspective to this day remains the same. I'm aware it's offensive, but taking back what I said about Edvard would be taking back the truth, and leaving him to potentially go to hell. He has to be offended. Plastic smiles and singing kumbaya isn't always the best method to look after others, Christian woman. Emotions guide us, Christ himself suggested speaking from the heart, this means be truthful, not pretentious and the fruits we bare will be built on foundations that are real. For Vard and myself, this is how it's done. And yes I'm aware of the hefty price I pay for every time I feel the need to return some abuse to Eddy. Sticks and stones have no effect on the guy, I have him freaking out over truths, and his solution is for him to defeat himself, without practice it's unlikely he'll improve.
Thanks. And I hope we can keep Edvard here who was more worried about his IP address than about you or me.
Why thank me in advance and share your hopes for Edvard with me, boss ? You do think I dislike the guy right ?
Excuse my rudeness, Emily, but I just wanted to point out something about yourself that sometimes rubs others the wrong way. I personally don't worry about it, but I can see how some would think you might be holding a gun to their heads while assuming others will do what you say.
In my opinion, this place is not healthy for Edvard. What's the point of going to a place all the time and be like "I hope no one finds me ! Wow... that would be soooo bad....
And Fuck you Tony + 1,000 = 1,000 Fuck you Tony's !"
I admit, sometimes I'm an ass, but with reason and purpose, otherwise I wouldn't even bother, and to me that would be less productive.
??? Hi Spatial
Your msg sounds nothing like I meant and even less like you. were you venting all your past thoughts at once?
How can you not see how twisted this msg you wrote comes across. How did it come out all upside down and backwards.
No wonder ppl do not understand you but cant get past this image of you. Who the heck says things like Am I not Fantastic?
This sounds like a complete projection of either trying to judge or control, or trying to accuse me of that, even labeling me in ways I dont rrecognize (like Christian woman which I dont see myself as. Where did you get that or do these terms mean something different to you?)
When neither of us is about this petty judgment and projection.
This msg seems totally opposite of either you or me, can you see this?
Thanks for the effort to reply, but this is messed up! I think we need to control-alt-delete this msg and reboot this conversation.
When i dont recognize either person in how you stated this, something is really wrong.
Yours truly, Emily
by emilynghiem??? Hi Spatial
Your msg sounds nothing like I meant and even less like you. were you venting all your past thoughts at once?
I was explaining how I deal with Ed's case, and why I do it the way I do.
How can you not see how twisted this msg you wrote comes across. How did it come out all upside down and backwards.
I've done everything you've suggested I should do, and I continue that. For me it's a bit ironic. I do forgive Ed, I have no grudge, I don't feel I owe him any apology and however things turn out between him and I is really up to him.
No wonder ppl do not understand you but cant get past this image of you. Who the heck says things like Am I not Fantastic?
No one really, which is why I said it. It's my kind of humour.
This sounds like a complete projection of either trying to judge or control, or trying to accuse me of that, even labeling me in ways I dont rrecognize (like Christian woman which I dont see myself as. Where did you get that or do these terms mean something different to you?)
I called you that simply because of the values you express. Had I known it would've offended you I wouldn't have said it. Okay, so you can't handle being addressed as a Christian.
When neither of us is about this petty judgment and projection.
This msg seems totally opposite of either you or me, can you see this?
From what I've seen, an intervention that has to do with Ed and I never looks pretty. From my perspective the projection I displayed here isn't petty, it's the truth.
Thanks for the effort to reply, but this is messed up! I think we need to control-alt-delete this msg and reboot this conversation.
When i dont recognize either person in how you stated this, something is really wrong.
Yours truly, Emily
As I said to you a moment ago, the truth isn't always pretty, and in order to become all knowing, the truth is something we must learn to handle.
I would encourage you to try to understand and work with what I wrote, but it's not my goal to discourage or upset you. We can delete these if you wish, though there isn't anything else I have to say about the matter.
I'll admit pointing out your strong attribute to take initiative, might have been me pressing my luck. There is a quality about you that wants things a certain way, and this time you'd rather blow away everything and start over. I imagine me wanting to keep the text would irritate that part of your ego. I still think what I do is right, at least for the time being.
It was mentioned earlier how this topic makes me seem cold and bitter, when it comes to this subject, it's in my best interest to be as direct as possible. Don't take it personal or get caught in the crossfire, empathic Emily. This side of me is for Ed, and the desired outcome is in sync with your suggestions, it's just from my experience with that guy, things have to be done like this.
I don't think Spatial could of made it any clearer. I have no idea about the whole backstory about Ed and you Spatial but I perfectly understood your post and what you were trying to convey to Emily...However Emily on the other hand seems to be projecting and restating what you have written and putting a question mark...instead of accepting the message for what it is she prefers to delude herself (mainly due to a lack of intelligence) into convincing others of how' twisted , and backwards' your posts are. in fact....i don't think it could have been put any simpler..!
peace
Thank you Poan. Emily is actually really smart in a sophisticated way. She knows I could just end all of this, and I know I can too. But then I think about the Holy war and I feel Ed has the potential to detach himself from whatever influences him to involve himself in his friends matters for the sake of sport and escalating rage. When he gives that up, I won't have any ammunition to use against him.