Sociopath Community

 you should try conditioning them.. perhaps let them know casually in a converstaion how your last gf texted you all the time and that's why you broke up. she just didn't understand that you really need to focus on studies, and appreciated your own space.

 I find it very hard to believe that someone would become infatuated with you after a single interaction. If it's true, then they must be very insecure, which says more about their mental state than your appeal to them.

Either that, or you're recieving mixed signals and assuming their interest in you is more than it truly is. Which means, either you're the insecure one or just confused about their intentions.

 Hmmm interesting.

Well after the first 3 minute interaction this guy wrote me a 500-word love note about how amazing I am. I guess I think of it as one interaction because I didn't flirt with him much in PERSON after that, it was really more online, stringing him along.

But when I did run into him again in person, that was when he (obviously insecure) became rather violent and tried to harass me...

I don't know how conditioning someone works if their affection has already taken a negative dive?

 Maybe you're right though. I just end up attracting insecure people, rather than actually seducing them.

You met a guy for the first time ever (no prior contact) and 3 minutes later he's writing you a love note?

Where did you meet this guy and under what circumstances?

It's possible he was already stalking you. If he was, then I can understand why he appeared to become infatuated so quickly. In his mind, he likely had a relationship with you already established.

Other than that, it makes no sense to me as to why he was writing you a love note so soon.

Maybe he was just very insecure and socially awkward. Though, he sounds more like a stalker. Stalkers are known to become violent when faced with rejection.

 No ... it was that we MET for 3 minutes, and then the next day (or maybe it was later in the day, I don't remember) was when he wrote me the love note.

(Similar instances have happened before actually ... I don't know what it is about me that attracts this behavior). But in this example, this was back in college ... I was in the dining hall eating with my friend, and he sat down with us. And I talked to him for 3 MINUTES and then I had to leave to go to class, and he said that we should hang out, and I didn't really give him a straight answer and I left. Then he found me on facebook and wrote me this long message about l about how amazing I was and I'm the greatest person ever, etc. Then I wrote back and was played coy about it, and then he wrote me back and "explained" it to me by recounting the whole story of how we met. ("You were eating with your friend, and I sat wtih you, blahblahblah." The letter was longer than the actual meeting.)

Then after that, if I saw him at a party, he would yell at me or call me a bitch or kick me or slam the door if I happened to be nearby.

I guess the main issue is that I was never quite stern with him to break it off (I told him no, but I realize now I should have probably threatened to tell the University police ... because I was actually pretty scared that he would physically hurt me.)

I mean, I don't think this guy is normal, but now I have maybe this (irrational) fear that people being infatuated wtih you means that they'll harass you ... so I WANT to let people like me/be infatured wtih me/etc, but I don't know how to avoid the negative possibilities.

It does make sense to me condition them not to be "annoying" (e.g., texting too much, etc) and I think that's something that could work well.

But what about if you make someone like you, and they think that that means they're entitled to grab you/grope you? Or what if they're insecure/mad that they don't have what they want, and start harassing you?

 Now that I'm reading it back ... maybe the issue wasn't that I was seducing him, because if I had seduced him, that would have meant I would have given him more of what he "wanted"? And by turning him down and not giving him what he wanted, he wanted it more, and that's why he went crazy?

That kind of doesn't make sense either haha.

 I don't believe you're being honest. 

Meeting someone for three short minutes barely gives someone enough time to determine what kind of person you are and it's certainly not enough time to establish a relationship.

Now, fair enough, some people are quick to judge, but to claim that someone fell in love with you and thought you were amazing after 3 minutes is completely unrealistic outside of a stalker situation.

I think you're either a narcissist, who is trying to boost their own ego due to low self-esteem, or you're a troll.

Which is it?

 I COMPLETELY agree with you 100%. Meeting someone for three minutes does NOT give someone time to determine what kind of person I am, nor is it enough to establish a relationship. That's why it was scary.

But the story itself really is irrelevant. It's obviously something that doesn't reverberate with you, so just forget the story. My question is really, once people people become infatuated with you, how do you avoid them harassing you?

I'm referring to this post: http://www.sociopathworld.com/2013/01/seducing-too-well.html