Okay I read the letter and it does not change anything.
According to the toothless policeman it did. He said it took three or four decent blows to beat you unconcious because of your thick skull, and that even when you were out for the count, you were still making fucked up quacking noises and drooling a lot. ....but hey...toothless coppers are notoriously unreliable with information.
Are you sure? Making weird noises would be a legit reason why that girl was staring at you.
I wonder, since you are a special case, what is your relationship with KFC? And Watermelons? On one hand you should love them but on another your emotional palette is pretty grey. So....
Okay Tom. This 9 second video is my response to this post.
His full self-bestowed title ultimately became: "His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor Idi Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Seas and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular", in addition to his officially stated claim of being the uncrowned King of Scotland.