In that case... you're still just an uber douche.
Hello Miss Amanda.
Your ex is either "Bipolar" or has "Borderline Personality disorder"
Without you knowing the depth of either of those. You can easily agree that your ex, has a relationship disorder.
This person you're talking about has traits of extreme obsession. Your ex does experience very intense emotions on many levels.
It's safer to lean toward Bipolar ( Also known as Manic depressive ) before thinking BPD.
Your Ex..
- Has a youthful mind
- Sometimes asks the simplest questions seeking your opinion
- Is very animated when in a good mood, ( one of your favourite things about them, making them extra special in your heart )
The list is long and complicated. Know this. A bipolar mind has very powerful emotions. This also means extreme jealously. If your ex sees you talking to a stranger, because of his magnified emotions, for him to see you do that is like you seeing him cheating on you. There is right and wrong, and society tells him this is ok. But it just doesn't feel good.
About the leaving thing. When you study bipolar, and "why bipolar push people away", you'll find endless reasons, but in general, a bipolar mind fears being abandoned so often they do it before it happens to them. After all, it's not easy for them to keep friends. You yourself know your ex is rather toxic, but you sticked around cause you loved him.
When dealing with bipolar minds, you need to set aside your own ego, and understand that these people sometimes get tormented by their emotions. He loved you too bad. They can also overthink things and come up with irrational conclusions from time to time.
Of course, not all bipolar minds are the same. There are those who on the most part, do not allow their emotions to influence their behaviours.
Right now your ex could be enduring a depressive episode, where he will not talk to you, and will avoid you.
It hurts, but do not take that personally. It can last a long time. Either manic or depressive phases can last a long time.
Narcissistic ? Of course it is, but not really. Bipolar minds are enslaved to an evil illness, and it is required that you try to understand things from their point of view, though it's tough to swallow, especially if you are involved with one emotionally, cause you're own ego will get mashed.
Yes you are a victim, so is your ex. But for you Amanda, you are a victim of confusion, get educated on bipolar to see what you are dealing with. ( Acutally by default you are in seek answers mode right now. )
Sociopath ? It feels like it, especially when you have no idea what the hell is wrong with that person.
It's not that he is self centered. It's that his emotions are so intense and sometimes so difficult to cope, he might come across as so.
Lovingly, you can feel the saga in a very dramatic way. It is far out. When you see him, it will feel like science fiction. Learn more about Bipolar, for it is more likely this is the kind of mindset your ex has. Write him an email, or a hand written letter, his is very prone to guilt and shame. Him distancing himself would happen for all kinds of reasons, but usually it has to do with preventing serious emotional distress, and on top of that, he's prone to guilt and shame that is also retard'deadly as intense as the fear and worries that compelled him to head for the hills.