the question is also why would I Will to will to will myself to be kind? I think this layer is not redundant at all though it may seem so, but allows us to get to the core of an integrity-driven motivation
Because kindness maximizes entropy. Its the state to which all living things return to, eventually.
Any deviations from kindness are just fluctuations around the entropic mean.
What do you think sits at the very foundation of integrity?
Chicken. Said he who's afraid SC would ruin his life or something if he actually proved anything.
A kid deserves a job that will have a major impact on his life, and you need to call in your one favor to get him in and fight for him with your reputation on the line.
Deserves. Heh.
I think it would be foolish to grant some kid the power to destroy my reputation.
I'll ask you this Legga. Imagine you did him a solid, then he fucks up and, YOU.... end up falling down with him. Like an ass. A jackass.
You behaviour here often gave me the impression that you revel in telling people about how good and smart you are, when I wrote my post I thought of you as the opposite of what I talked about in my OP except for the part where I point out the egocentric desire to flaunt your kindness.. I see you do it all the time on this forum and you express otherwise quite hateful and judgmental behaviour, so not kind at all.
Yeah ? What did I do, did I attack someone ?
The thing is I am sure you are not a bad person, you are kind but you seem like an unhappy person who compares himself to others and probably has insecurities which is why you act above everyone else
So here you say I'm kind, but in your last paragraph you said I'm not kind at all.
What I can see here. I'm viewed as some arrogant prude by certain individuals.
My only question to them would be, why is degenerate ideology worth fighting for ? I mean things like puberty blockers for children.
Last time I asked what's worth fighting for on the left, and what's good on that end of the spectrum, and from what I gathered, that question probably irritated you, while I don't think you have an answer that wouldn't be shameful, or an answer at all.
Remember. There are people out there who vote left, because the people on TV told them who to hate.
It's been said, when someone needs to be silenced. It's a psy-op, and here I am throwing a bunch of goodies on the scale and I have to ask for reasons to consider swinging left. Join some hate groups or whatever is going on over there, I really don't know. I'm just the bad guy, again, to some individuals. Do I enjoy it ? Sure.
Where's that Dragoon kid these days ? That fucker right there hates me with a passion.
Because kindness maximizes entropy. Its the state to which all living things return to, eventually.
Any deviations from kindness are just fluctuations around the entropic mean.
What do you think sits at the very foundation of integrity?
If all parents throughout history did the opposite of taking care of their offspring, we wouldn't have made it this far.
Imagine all of a sudden your family, friends, and the world, started treating you like trash. No one wants you, you lose your job, end up on the street getting treated like trash by other homeless people.
One might say they can handle it and adapt, but it certainly wouldn't be a preference. In my opinion unkindness is more likely to maximize entropy.
Another example, nuking the globe. That would fall more along the lines of unkindness.
Golden Rule, 'do unto others', be the change you want to see in the world - many ways of saying/looking at the same stance. If someone asks for help and I'm able without causing myself issue, I feel compelled to do what I can. Within reason.
I feel like this is where most people diverge. What's within reason? Isn't true kindness, rather selflessness, LOVE in a fundamental way defined by giving at your own cost or peril? The question is how much you are willing to give. A Buddhist monk gives everything, your average Joe donates 5 euro a month to charity - How much is within reason?
When kindness is seen as weakness it screws everything. There are so many 'good' people who got burned too many times leading them to become jaded and bitter, refusing to lend even the most basic hand to someone in dire need.
True and part of me wonders whether their kindness was truly kind to begin with.
I am not judging people for being flawed, but we are exploring true selflessness here
Free market capitalism has instilled this idea that if something doesn't profit you it's not worth the time and effort. This has led the sense of community, in it's truest form, to deteriorate leading to incredible isolation even in large cities. The resulting alienation fuels ever increasing numbers of mental illness and unprovoked violence.
It benefits everyone if we make an effort to engage others with kindness,
Indeed, it's the same old story.. There is something to be said for the power of rebound - People tend to relish in contrast and it feels good to rebel against a hollow society through kindness, sometimes even more so than in a society which is already kind. Perhaps some deeper part of us is actively guiding us toward these conflicting tendencies
unless there's good reason not to, of course.
Interesting how often you feel the need to make this caveat. You're setting some strong boundaries :D
True kindness isn't anywhere close to this 'selflessness' you seem to be equating it with. According to the oxford dictionary it means: "the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate." To me, that just means a basic human decency where you don't ignore the little things you can do to make life less difficult for those close to you, and perhaps the occasional stranger/homeless person. It's not some missionary zeal to make the world a better place by doing any and every thing possible to serve one's fellow man.
I guess you can also have selfish kindness. I dont see the problem in associating kindness with the intrinsic rather than the extrinsic property though. I think intention matters. If someone is kind only to get ahead, I'd say that is manipulative.
Spatial, you're right. However, nuclear bomb is more like a phase transition. Its the deviation from the entropic mean, rather than the norm.
Humanity is more prosperous than ever. Religions are incredibly successful, because everyone knows we need to be kind. Maybe it's because Jesus exists, or maybe it's because we all know a kind world is better than an unkind one. Irrespective of the underlying reason, we can all witness the fact that the world wants to be kind. If that weren't the case, we wouldn't be here.
Our shared understanding that a kind world is better than an unkind one is what drives the evolution of our society. Its a gentle push, but the entropic mean is guaranteed to eventually tilt the globe towards a kinder world.
Chicken. Said he who's afraid SC would ruin his life or something if he actually proved anything.
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An old friend of mine, not sure if we're even friends anymore. Not really. His message from him through his Mother, to his Father, then to the rest of us, is he done with everyone, even me. I feel no way about it cause I honestly can't defend him.
He did compete with me in terms of decency, but only when I'm around. He's even less wrathful if I show up. Which goes to show he knows better. When I was there it was taxing on me energetically in some way shape of form. I can't seem to score goals around him, or I'm less likely to.
When I'm not around he's very cruel. I know his family and extended family and every holiday or special occasion it's the same thing with that guy. He ruins it. His Father's Birthday, he showed up, freaked out at 2 younger guys for never calling him while proclaiming to be their Father figure, then he took off. That happened before I showed up that day, or else it wouldn't have happened.
A few times when he's being treated and we eat out, he'd give the waiter a hard time with specifics. One time he lost his shit over a side order of pickled veggies. He wasn't even paying and his behavior made us feel ashamed to sit with him while telling him to chill the fuck out.
Christmas....Everything would be going smoothly, then with a low tone he'll say something like "Okay I'm just gonna say this once, I just want a quiet dinner" then a fight breaks out. It's like that EVERY CHRISTMAS I've ever seen with him.
I'm pretty sure he's the reason why I'm at peace with skipping holidays, nor do I wish to ever celebrate my own Birthday, and I'm totally good with it. And why ? Cause I'm soooo not like that. It even makes me sick when people worry about who'll know it's their Birthday. I delisted my Birthday from all social media cause it makes me feel odd how people are programmed to just drop a happy birthday out of obligation or whatever that is. I myself never say Happy Birthday on people's social media, if I decide to say something I'll talk about something else past or present, and I'd get a genuine happy response.
He lost all his female friends, blocked and banned him, all of his male friends, his daughter, his Brothers, his Father.
One friend cut him off cause he pulled the "I was always there for you, I was at your Mother funeral, I had your back when you had Cancer" and our guy told him to fuck off. This guy is an opportunist for credit. He even stole my artwork and said he did it to impress this girl I liked once.
He threatens to bind people with magic, and he's dead serious. And I'm talking about people who let him freeload at their home for a year. I told him, dude, you need to get out of here, or get a job, or go back on ODSP or something, you can't carry on like this. As soon as they threw him out, he moved in with his Mother, then went on ODSP, cause no one was paying for him anymore, but he could've did that the whole time.
His Birthday is coming up and at this point If I call him he'll curse me out, and If I don't call him, he'll curse me out for not calling him.
If you score a goal, he'll be the one to highlight the negatives.
We which is everyone who knows him, has a policy not to let this guy know where we're working, cause he'll call it and try to get a job on your behalf. He got into a fight with his ex's boss. He dug up dirt on the boss and waved it in her face. The boss wanted him lynched. The solution was to fake that his ex was fired, then he stopped calling the place.
I said to him dude, that is fucked up, and his reply, "Well it all worked out cause she has a better job now" that ex is the Mother of his child btw.
He's always been this way, but it got worse with age. He started losing people who tolerated him up to his mid 40's.
Can't mix him with people, he'll stare at them or do or say things. People naturally don't like him, except when it comes to women, he's pretty good at reeling them in, before the mask slips.
If I think a girl is pretty he'll do his darndest to hook up with her. Then the girl will tell another girl I know, who'll tell me how he showed up to her home, wouldn't take no for an answer, so the girls Father had to show up to get him out of there. The act, like many of his antics, is so shameful he himself wouldn't tell anyone, but we always see everything. We all gossiped about him, and I hate gossip. The thing is he's so out there it's hard to resist separating oneself from him, by disavowing him regularly. We stopped talking about him all together.
I suspect one day. He'll return, and he'll be armed. I won't trust him. In advance each and everyone one of us loathes the idea of seeing him again at a funeral. The last Funeral he wasn't welcomed, and he was upset about that, even though his own family all went to his Daughter's Grandfather's funeral, and his best friend, myself, was a paul bearer.
He's so far gone, If this guy became rich and powerful, we'd all hide.
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This is a long post, most of you won't read. Believe me, I understand the effects when one lacks sense and is self absorbed, and cruel. Wiser to be neutral than unkind, though neutral is closer to being a dick without being a dick, while not getting much out being that way.
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I read it.
You had a friend, who was a dick, and you dont like him. So you know how it feels like to be around unkind people, so it's better not to be unkind. Also your friend was popular with girls, which annoyed you, because you felt the girls were being played.
I'd say I admire you for giving ground.
However, there is another thread that is completely unrelated that I realised about you when reading that post. Maybe there's another time for that.
Chicken. Said he who's afraid SC would ruin his life or something if he actually proved anything.
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10/9/2025 11:33:53 AM
I read it, Tony. Sounds like a total dick. I'm amazed you all put up with him for as long as you did. I haven't bothered with fam for a long time for similar reasons. Eventually I think you either sever ties with people like this or you suffer and lose part of yourself in the tolerating it.
I read it.
You had a friend, who was a dick, and you dont like him. So you know how it feels like to be around unkind people, so it's better not to be unkind. Also your friend was popular with girls, which annoyed you, because you felt the girls were being played.
It doesn't particularly annoy me all that much as I do nothing to cockblock him, though he used to do that to me when we were young. I don't complain cause all of his ex's, his family, and even some of his cousins fell in love with me. It's funny how it worked out in that regard.
I pointed out how good he is at picking up girls, ( Or rather the fact he's done it many times ) goes to show he knows better. In the end they always grew fearful of him before detaching.
I'd say I admire you for giving ground.
However, there is another thread that is completely unrelated that I realised about you when reading that post. Maybe there's another time for that.
Feel free to bring it up.
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I read it, Tony. Sounds like a total dick. I'm amazed you all put up with him for as long as you did. I haven't bothered with fam for a long time for similar reasons. Eventually I think you either sever ties with people like this or you suffer and lose part of yourself in the tolerating it.
I've known him for about 33 years. As time passed he got worse. The more I distanced myself from him, the more stories I would hear about from everyone else. By our late 30's he'd start doing this thing, where he would twist the truth about the past. He'd also start telling my own stories and insert himself into the picture, then with a bright and shiny face insist that's how it was. All of this while I was basically serving as his own personal Vulkan, keeping his body and mind from drifting away into foolishness, but I couldn't sustain him, it was impacting my own success rate.
Yesterday was Canadian Thanksgiving and I had a feast with
- His Father
- His Mother
- His Baby Momma
- His Daughter
- His Brother.
- Another friend of ours
And we were joined by....
- His ex lady friend ( the one who got away )
- His ex lady friend's daughter ( who he says weird shit too )
He wasn't welcome to come and join us. The only one he still speaks to is his Mother and even she knows not to mix the cat and the rat. It was also his Birthday yesterday, and literally no one called him. Instead we celebrated 2 other Birthdays this weekend.
That list doesn't even mention the others who banned him from their life. I don't think his own family will invite him to funerals at this point. He's already barred from graduations and weddings.
Frankly I think what he's going through is his young soul purpose. It's getting something it needs from this for his own growth.
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Currently he's with this other woman, living at her place. She brings him to Church every week, and she really seems to keep him in check, or else he'll have to go back to live with his Mama. They've been to couples therapy a few times already though, which is amazing considering she brings more to the table than he does. Historically in his partnerships turned into shitshows, but for some reason I think.... Actually, that woman is doing us all a favor by keeping the guy. He called me sometime last year and told me how his GF's Mother had to pull over and lecture him about cursing at other drivers as a passenger in her vehicle. Said something about how "we do not behave that way in this car" and he told me about it like it was some amazing progress, meanwhile he's in his late 40's. Two weeks ago when he was leaving his Mother's place, he sent his GF to the car for a private moment with his parents, and he had an absolute tantrum cause the place wasn't in pristine condition for their arrival, and now his Brother is threatening him.