Sociopath Community

I have ADD not adhd anyway and I do not take any sort of stimulant before sleeping,  but I still feel more calm on both adderall and ritalin than on nothing at all because they help to organize and focus my thoughts a lot better than my nonmedicated state which is soothing for me  it interestingly decreases anxiety caused by disorganized thoughts but increases some other types of anxiety sometimes

sometimes I forget that there is a difference between add and adhd and use them interchangeably

compassionatequeen said: 

I have ADD not adhd anyway and I do not take any sort of stimulant before sleeping,  but I still feel more calm on both adderall and ritalin than on nothing at all because they help to organize and focus my thoughts a lot better than my nonmedicsted state which is soothing for me  it interestingly decreases anxiety caused by disorganized thoughts but increases some other types of anxiety sometimes

Are you calmer though, or just more organized? From my own time on it and from watching others I'd say that a large symptom of addy is an inaccuracy with self-reporting, like when BR and Peach tried to say it was fine. Like shit I felt great too, beyond great, and if that me were being asked I'd probably say I'm fine too. 

Either way: 

Turncoat said: 

If addy's calming you down then you're likely taking it before bed to lack REM sleep, or you are so hyper naturally that taking it has you burn out faster. 

sometimes I forget that there is a difference between add and adhd and use them interchangeably

...it happens in the field too, but it's kinda like comparing Aspergers to full blown Autism. They will usually prescribe the same stuff for each but at (ideally) a much lower dose for the former. 

I tend to use a day's energy like a campfire metaphor, that the quieter the flame burns the longer they last, while the quicker the flame burns the quicker it goes out. 

ADHD is like having too much kindling so that it can only keep up a roaring flame, while by contrast Depression is like having too little of damp firewood so the flame goes out quicker, especially if they try to be a roaring flame. 

Adderall and other uppers are like throwing gasoline on the fire. 

Turncoat said: 

compassionatequeen said: 

I have ADD not adhd anyway and I do not take any sort of stimulant before sleeping,  but I still feel more calm on both adderall and ritalin than on nothing at all because they help to organize and focus my thoughts a lot better than my nonmedicsted state which is soothing for me  it interestingly decreases anxiety caused by disorganized thoughts but increases some other types of anxiety sometimes

Are you calmer though, or just more organized? From my own time on it and from watching others I'd say that a large symptom of addy is an inaccuracy with self-reporting, like when BR and Peach tried to say it was fine. Like shit I felt great too, beyond great, and if that me were being asked I'd probably say I'm fine too. 

Either way: 

Turncoat said: 

If addy's calming you down then you're likely taking it before bed to lack REM sleep, or you are so hyper naturally that taking it has you burn out faster. 

If you are already wicked hyper, uppers can make that energy top out. It also though kinda fucks with brain chemistry overtime... so there's that too. Continued use of stimulants has a tendency of burning out the user over how the body begins seeing the medication as where to harvest energy, rather than the natural way it once did, shutting down natural production of what addy is simulating. 

sometimes I forget that there is a difference between add and adhd and use them interchangeably

...it happens in the field too, but it's kinda like comparing Aspergers to full blown Autism. They will usually prescribe the same stuff for each but at (ideally) a much lower dose for the former. 

one thing that annoys me about you that you do often is question in an invalidating way-  if I say that it makes me calmer,  that is what I mean why would you try to make me or anyone else doubt their experiences ?  that is not a part of therapy,  therapy is supposed to encourage and empower and help build up the confidence of their clients,  not tear it down  it gives me more energy too while also making me calmer but I have chronic fatigue syndrome and it works as helpfully as with narcolepsy on that  my issue has never been clinical depression because I rarely experience apathy  (prettyy much required for a clinical depression diagnosis)  and instead swing from super happy to hopeless feelings and suicidal ideation  (and sometimes lengths of time of feeling both often through the day)  at varying lengths of time with no real pattern and with all of the emotional spectrum in between,  and I can be in the best moods ever for even months at a time unmeducated and still be completely exhausted,  as well as just by changing my thoughts I can bring myself out of a more depressed phase  (which again is not feeling apathetic for me  (rarely sometimes I feel bored just like everyone else but that is about it)  but more just focusing on everything wrong and fearful and sometimes I get stuck in that and forget that I can talk myself out of it in my head and as soon as I remember how to it always works

I do not fit a typical diagnosis of anything,  but I do know what medications work for me and what medications do not and even worse have bad side effects  (most meds do not work on me well and most have bad side effects-  I have tried a lot of them)

compassionatequeen said: 

Turncoat said: 

compassionatequeen said: 

I have ADD not adhd anyway and I do not take any sort of stimulant before sleeping,  but I still feel more calm on both adderall and ritalin than on nothing at all because they help to organize and focus my thoughts a lot better than my nonmedicsted state which is soothing for me  it interestingly decreases anxiety caused by disorganized thoughts but increases some other types of anxiety sometimes

Are you calmer though, or just more organized? From my own time on it and from watching others I'd say that a large symptom of addy is an inaccuracy with self-reporting, like when BR and Peach tried to say it was fine. Like shit I felt great too, beyond great, and if that me were being asked I'd probably say I'm fine too. 

Either way: 

Turncoat said: 

If addy's calming you down then you're likely taking it before bed to lack REM sleep, or you are so hyper naturally that taking it has you burn out faster. 

If you are already wicked hyper, uppers can make that energy top out. It also though kinda fucks with brain chemistry overtime... so there's that too. Continued use of stimulants has a tendency of burning out the user over how the body begins seeing the medication as where to harvest energy, rather than the natural way it once did, shutting down natural production of what addy is simulating. 

sometimes I forget that there is a difference between add and adhd and use them interchangeably

...it happens in the field too, but it's kinda like comparing Aspergers to full blown Autism. They will usually prescribe the same stuff for each but at (ideally) a much lower dose for the former. 

 

one thing that annoys me about you that you do often is question in an invalidating way-  if I say that it makes me calmer,  that is what I mean why would you try to make me or anyone else doubt their experiences ?  that is not a part of therapy,  therapy is supposed to encourage and empower and help build up the confidence of their clients,  not tear it down  it gives me more energy too while also making me calmer but I have chronic fatigue syndrome and it works as helpfully as with narcolepsy on that  my issue has never been clinical depression because I rarely experience apathy  (prettyy much required for a clinical depression diagnosis)  and instead swing from super happy to hopeless feelings and suicidal ideation  (and sometimes lengths of time of feeling both often through the day)  at varying lengths of time with no real pattern and with all of the emotional spectrum in between,  and I can be in the best moods ever for even months at a time unmeducated and still be completely exhausted,  as well as just by changing my thoughts I can bring myself out of a more depressed phase  (which again is not feeling apathetic for me  (rarely sometimes I feel bored just like everyone else but that is about it)  but more just focusing on everything wrong and fearful and sometimes I get stuck in that and forget that I can talk myself out of it in my head and as soon as I remember how to it always works

 

I do not fit a typical diagnosis of anything,  but I do know what medications work for me and what medications do not and even worse have bad side effects  (most meds do not work on me well and most have bad side effects-  I have tried a lot of them)

 

 

yeah I am not soo easily to manipulate when I am coming out of depression,  am I ?  stop picking on me and stop trying to bully me because there is more where this is coming from,  and btw I have not even been taking my meds for the past couple days because I am conserving them because there is a nationwide adderall shortage going on  (and the generic brand that works on me is in like no pharmacies anywhere rn,  very concerning because other generics and even the name brand adderall do not work as well on me and have side effects and I would rather just be unmedicated because I am very sensitive to medications,  and getting headaches and not being able to focus any better than unmedicated while being on other generics / the name brand of it is not okay)

This is why I doubt TC has a psychology degree. Plus he's a proven compulsive liar, and this very thread was healthier before TC started acting up.

Can you imagine that guy doing cognitive therapy while everything he gets involved with turns to shit ?

He's not even right.

compassionatequeen said: 

compassionatequeen said: 

one thing that annoys me about you that you do often is question in an invalidating way-  if I say that it makes me calmer,  that is what I mean why would you try to make me or anyone else doubt their experiences ?

This is what had me listing typical situations for what might amount to Speed calming you down, that in typical subjects that they either have some form of hyperactivity disorder, that it's being used before sleep to disturb REM, or that you might be giving an inaccurate self-report. These are experiences I've seen others go through based on the same prescription, which corroborates with the findings in the field itself, and since you are still within the limitations and capacity of being a human being it seems like a fair place to compare and contrast. 

I even mentioned other people who took the med to build the room for a more direct comparison. 

Lines like this from you contribute towards my belief that you are not calm while it's in your system, as does you reporting to have been on it for months while acting hyperactive and spazzy: 

it gives me more energy too while also making me calmer

An increase in energy is in direct opposition to the idea of being calmer, it's more likely that you are reporting an increase in confidence and decreases in self-doubt. 

that is not a part of therapy,  therapy is supposed to encourage and empower and help build up the confidence of their clients

I'm not your therapist, you don't pay me so why should I do the whole song and dance where they omit 90% of what they're thinking when I could instead pull a Dr. Phil? 

If you want me to play therapist, then you need to pay me. If you want me to be real, then don't pay me. 

it gives me more energy too while also making me calmer but I have chronic fatigue syndrome and it works as helpfully as with narcolepsy on that  my issue has never been clinical depression because I rarely experience apathy  (prettyy much required for a clinical depression diagnosis)  and instead swing from super happy to hopeless feelings and suicidal ideation 

You're having these insane mood swings with Addy though, right? 

Also did a doctor tell you you have chronic fatigue or are you self-diagnosing again? 

at varying lengths of time with no real pattern and with all of the emotional spectrum in between,  and I can be in the best moods ever for even months at a time unmeducated and still be completely exhausted

Have you ever questioned if these spikes of mood might be what is exhausting you? Intense emotions can be physically exhausting. 

Are there ever points where you are stuck with Insomnia, and if so how bad is it for you? 

,  as well as just by changing my thoughts I can bring myself out of a more depressed phase  (which again is not feeling apathetic for me  (rarely sometimes I feel bored just like everyone else but that is about it)  but more just focusing on everything wrong and fearful and sometimes I get stuck in that and forget that I can talk myself out of it in my head and as soon as I remember how to it always works

yeah I am not soo easily to manipulate when I am coming out of depression,  am I ? 

From what I've seen of you, you don't have depression though. Sadness is not the same thing, depression tends to be more like apathy and constant exhaustion. Even suicidal ideation when it's more passionate isn't always a byproduct of depression. 

stop picking on me and stop trying to bully me because there is more where this is coming from

I'm not trying to pick on you, this is just normal discussion. 

,  and btw I have not even been taking my meds for the past couple days because I am conserving them because there is a nationwide adderall shortage going on  (and the generic brand that works on me is in like no pharmacies anywhere rn,  very concerning because other generics and even the name brand adderall do not work as well on me and have side effects and I would rather just be unmedicated because I am very sensitive to medications,  and getting headaches and not being able to focus any better than unmedicated while being on other generics / the name brand of it is not okay)

How has that been affecting you so far? 

When I was taking it in the short term to pass some exams in college I saw some nasty withdrawal side effects after only a week or two of taking it, and some other lifelong types who tried to quit couldn't even make themselves get out of bed and stuff while gaining a ton of weight rapidly. 

Turncoat is completely retarded and I am ignoring anything that he posts  he is beyond cringing me out  stay out of my medication business you complete freak  you make me want to vomit  I have had mood swings since I was 7 or 8 years old and only took any sort of stimulant since I was 25,  up until age 25 I barely stayed on any medications at all because they either immediately caused side effects or after the trial run were still ineffective and I only started taking any medications prescribed by a psychiatrist age 18 on and I have had chronic fatigue syndrome since age 12 on

you are not a psychiatrist or a therapist soo if you want me to share any more of my personal information with you then forget it,  you are no one of significance you are a jobless loser who would be out on the streets without living in his parents' house  you need to stop trying to talk to people about their mental illness issues and their medications,  it is not your place like at all

compassionatequeen said: 

Turncoat is completely retarded and I am ignoring anything that he posts  he is beyond cringing me out  stay out of my medication business you complete freak  you make me want to vomit  I have had mood swings since I was 7 or 8 years old and only took any sort of stimulant since I was 25,  up until age 25 I barely stayed on any medications at all because they either immediately caused side effects or after the trial run were still ineffective and I only started taking any medications prescribed by a psychiatrist age 18 on and I have had chronic fatigue syndrome since age 12 on

you are not a psychiatrist or a therapist soo if you want me to share any more of my personal information with you then forget it,  you are no one of significance you are a jobless loser who would be out on the streets without living in his parents' house  you need to stop trying to talk to people about their mental illness issues and their medications,  it is not your place like at all

Obviously talking about this struck a nerve...

At this point you barely even trust Psychology anymore, literally sitting here saying you're too special a snowflake for any practitioner you've gone to to diagnose you while you diagnose yourself as like 10+ disorders. 

you are disgusting,   stop putting words in my mouth  all of my diagnosises are from psychiatrists and doctors who make 100s of thousands of dollars unlike your broke ssi ass  just because I ignore your absolute complete retarded head in your ass questions does not mean that I am agreeing with you you fucking retard