if you laugh when you are tickled its not you laughing its your body laughing and you cant control it
if you get an itch its your body getting an itch and you cant control it
if you pee because you cant hold it you cant control it
there is no reason to feel shame if it does something you dont want it to because of your surroundings right?
there is nothing to be upset about
but sometimes someone else can do things TO you that you dont want to happen. sometimes your body responds to those things. and then you realize its not just that you cant control your body, you also cant control the way you feel. but they can. they are controlling all that right now just by touching you, and you cant actually do anything about it.
someone else is controlling your body and controlling you and its so fucking scary
and maybe you cant control it but you still feel guilt