Sociopath Community

Turncoat said: 

Tryptamine said: 

That's generally true, but as an adjunct: Can't be a good listener without understanding.

The appearance of listening without argument tends to be enough. 

That's why it's an adjunct.

Dr. Winner said:

Trypt was the first person I spoke with where identity wasn’t hidden. I never heard of Jim before Trypt and I have way more in common with Trypt than Jim. Trypt has always been my first choice, but before now, we planned to meet twice and we are both stubborn, so we had a falling out both times before this one, and had one this time too, but I was going to be here anyway and we started texting, so he felt like he could visit me.

Now that we are together, physically, I am not afraid to admit that I actually like him and want to make something of this because of our chemistry. I’m not going to because I suck at relationships, and I’m not sure I can handle another person, but I want to take care of him and be there for him. Jim wanted to cuddle like Trypt does, but I couldn’t do it with him.

When I got drunk with Jim, everything fell apart. With Trypt, all I want to do is cuddle with him and make him feel good. When I get drunk with Trypt, I just feel like it’s easier to touch him because I don’t think about what happens if he doesn’t want me to touch him. I love touching him and I decided to stay another week so we can hang out more. I’ve had a crush on him since I first saw him, years ago, so I’m not doing the same thing as when I was with Jim. Jim was a last resort for me for getting married and I liked the part of him I later found out was fake. I have seen who Trypt is and I love who he is.

I love hanging out with him and if he ever decides he hates me, I’ll know it’s my fault and not his. I am also confident I’ll never get bored of him and I’m not disgusted by his neediness. I actually love his affection. When I touch him, I feel like the luckiest person in the world. I never felt that way with Jim and he was more of a means to an end. Trypt is probably the only person I have liked from the first time I spoke with him. Jim and I had some terrible times, but Trypt would never hurt me physically. I’m not saying he couldn’t be playing a mental game, just saying I respect the mental game. I love him and I am not just saying that. That’s why I have always hated Blanc, even though I don’t value people enough to hate them or hurt them, as I said before.

I’ve always disliked Blanc because she got to be with Trypt and she treated him badly. That made me dislike her for a long time. Now that I know him more personally, I’m even more disappointed in her, but I’m happy they didn’t work out because I wouldn’t have a chance if they did. He has the perfect body and the perfect mind. Even his issues are things I’m willing to love with. He is great with my baby and he’s friends with Jim, so he doesn’t hate my baby or Jim.

He understands what happened and who Jim is. He’s just so perfect for me and if things don’t work out, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m depressed about it. I know he has an issue with being with one person at a time and I’m all about being with only one person, forever, and that’s why I just try to enjoy being in the moment.

There’s a possibility that he’ll be able to be committed, but I know that’s not as easy as it sounds and I have cash to make, so it’s possible that we won’t work logistically, but I’m willing to move to this state, if I have to. He’s so loving and caring that even though he doesn’t believe in God, I think God is telling me that it’s okay to be with him because he looks like Jesus and he’s selfless.

He takes care of his grandparents and I’m in love with his commitment to them, even when I offered an alternative. He is so great that I’m not even concerned with what people think about it or getting hurt by him. I’m going crazy thinking about how happy I am with him. I’ll risk looking like an idiot, but it’s funny that I don’t fear that it’s one sided or that he will hurt me.

I know what I’m doing and I Know that the past had to happen to have this happen, so it was all worth it. Even my baby likes him. I know what I’m doing, man. It’s not random and it’s not about needing people’s affection. It’s about finding someone who understands me and Trypt gets me. My heart was never in anything until being with Trypt.

I’m passionate about being with him in the moment and what could happen next. With Jim, I just wanted to die. I literally went to England first, just in case Jim was going to kill me. I also wanted C4 more than Jim, so... The entire time, I wanted Trypt, but he was unavailable, so it’s not the same. It’s actually heavenly.

I'll be tackling this mountain later, but figured I'd move it here for now. 

Ummm... as a slightly less drunk person from when I wrote that, I’d say we should just pretend I never wrote that. I think he’s great and all, but I’m afraid it will be mistaken as me wanting to marry him or something. I would like to be with him, but marriage is for life and while he makes me feel good now, I’m not sure how he will be sober because in the past, I’ve strongly disliked his lack of honesty when he was sober. I need a way out, but I also need to try not to scare him away and this post you added makes me scared for him. It’s a bit intense and although we have spoken of this stuff, it just doesn’t feel like the right time to discuss this stuff. I’ve been drinking daily for a month now and I am not sure what I want this to be and until I know, I don’t want him to see it, so... If he decides to come online, I just want this to be buried until we have a sober discussion about this. It will happen soon though. Give it a day or two.

Dr. Winner said: 

Ummm... as a slightly less drunk person from when I wrote that, I’d say we should just pretend I never wrote that.

Lol you fragile narc. 

Now we have to focus on it more. 

I think he’s great and all, but I’m afraid it will be mistaken as me wanting to marry him or something. I would like to be with him, but marriage is for life and while he makes me feel good now, I’m not sure how he will be sober because in the past, I’ve strongly disliked his lack of honesty when he was sober. I need a way out, but I also need to try not to scare him away and this post you added makes me scared for him. It’s a bit intense and although we have spoken of this stuff, it just doesn’t feel like the right time to discuss this stuff. I’ve been drinking daily for a month now and I am not sure what I want this to be and until I know, I don’t want him to see it, so... If he decides to come online, I just want this to be buried until we have a sober discussion about this. It will happen soon though. Give it a day or two.

Dr. Winner said:

I think he’s great and all, but I’m afraid it will be mistaken as me wanting to marry him or something.

[source]

I guess the Honeymoon phase is ending, like it did with Jim. 

You only like love when it's new and exciting, the path of a spinster. 

Dr. Winner said: 

Ummm... as a slightly less drunk person from when I wrote that, I’d say we should just pretend I never wrote that. I think he’s great and all, but I’m afraid it will be mistaken as me wanting to marry him or something. I would like to be with him, but marriage is for life and while he makes me feel good now, I’m not sure how he will be sober because in the past, I’ve strongly disliked his lack of honesty when he was sober. I need a way out, but I also need to try not to scare him away and this post you added makes me scared for him. It’s a bit intense and although we have spoken of this stuff, it just doesn’t feel like the right time to discuss this stuff. I’ve been drinking daily for a month now and I am not sure what I want this to be and until I know, I don’t want him to see it, so... If he decides to come online, I just want this to be buried until we have a sober discussion about this. It will happen soon though. Give it a day or two.

 This reminded me of that time we came to the conclusion in chat about something that was different between us, you said you only liked the drunk him and I said I liked the sober him. 

 he also changed a bit over the last three years. 

Blanc said: 

Dr. Winner said: 

Ummm... as a slightly less drunk person from when I wrote that, I’d say we should just pretend I never wrote that. I think he’s great and all, but I’m afraid it will be mistaken as me wanting to marry him or something. I would like to be with him, but marriage is for life and while he makes me feel good now, I’m not sure how he will be sober because in the past, I’ve strongly disliked his lack of honesty when he was sober. I need a way out, but I also need to try not to scare him away and this post you added makes me scared for him. It’s a bit intense and although we have spoken of this stuff, it just doesn’t feel like the right time to discuss this stuff. I’ve been drinking daily for a month now and I am not sure what I want this to be and until I know, I don’t want him to see it, so... If he decides to come online, I just want this to be buried until we have a sober discussion about this. It will happen soon though. Give it a day or two.

 This reminded me of that time we came to the conclusion in chat about something that was different between us, you said you only liked the drunk him and I said I liked the sober him. 

 he also changed a bit over the last three years. 

 Yeah, I don’t really know what I like anymore. Stress is easy to handle for me, but I have lots of anxiety, so not sure what I can handle from others. Some stuff I do and put up with might be too much on a daily basis, but honestly, when I’m rich, I’ll just chill and let everything be what it is.

Turncoat said: 

Dr. Winner said:

I think he’s great and all, but I’m afraid it will be mistaken as me wanting to marry him or something.

[source]

I guess the Honeymoon phase is ending, like it did with Jim. 

You only like love when it's new and exciting, the path of a spinster. 

 I still feel amazing whenever we touch at all, so it’s not like Jim. It’s something more, I just value strength and maybe that’s not what I’m seeing. I’m just not sure if I can handle the stress and my own. I’m not going to change how I feel about him in general, or how I feel when I’m around him, but I like to chill and I feel like I’m being a mom more than I have to be and I’m nurturing, but only to a certain extent and I have a baby, so she comes first. I just feel bad for him and that’s not exactly how I felt about Jim while we were together. Trypt is extremely nice and kind and cool, but there’s just no way I can accomplish my goals and live outside of California. Just not feasible and I’m trying to kill the feels so it’s not so hard when I leave. Logic helps with that.

Dr. Winner said: 

Turncoat said: 

Dr. Winner said:

I think he’s great and all, but I’m afraid it will be mistaken as me wanting to marry him or something.

[source]

I guess the Honeymoon phase is ending, like it did with Jim. 

You only like love when it's new and exciting, the path of a spinster. 

I still feel amazing whenever we touch at all, so it’s not like Jim. It’s something more, I just value strength and maybe that’s not what I’m seeing. I’m just not sure if I can handle the stress and my own. I’m not going to change how I feel about him in general, or how I feel when I’m around him, but I like to chill and I feel like I’m being a mom more than I have to be and I’m nurturing, but only to a certain extent and I have a baby, so she comes first. I just feel bad for him and that’s not exactly how I felt about Jim while we were together. Trypt is extremely nice and kind and cool, but there’s just no way I can accomplish my goals and live outside of California. Just not feasible and I’m trying to kill the feels so it’s not so hard when I leave. Logic helps with that.

You're making excuses to leave him now that it's become easier to based on your whole 'losing interest in people you've had sex with' thing. 

You just want the spark, the mystery, the climb, the achievement, and you seem to think it's gone now. It was never about Tryp at all. 

Turncoat said: 

You're bi. 

 Shhhhhhhh that's not as cool as being lesbian!