From Choose A Forum Member To Be Your Voice:
ImNotHer stated: source post
Even while I'm saying the one thing I know will do the most emotional damage to a person I think I've lost respect for, and hoping it will hurt like hell... I know that I wouldn't turn my back on them if they needed me to be there for them as a friend.
Systematic stated: source post
On a surface level I can hold decent conversation, am a trustworthy individual and take pride that I adhere to a set of moral values. Nothing could be farther from the truth however, I only abide by these values when it's easy(when I'm not emotional, triggered or sore). I criticize others for behaviors I readily indulge and dismiss any claims of hypocrisy through transparent self justification. Though I like the idea of being honest, I'm not. I'm actively engaged in gossip and drama at all times, I earned the nickname ratvard that way. I share personal information on a whim or I'll wait until they aren't around on the forum anymore to contest me before I publicly share their private information. Oh and don't mention this to me or I'll be obsessed with getting back at you until my ego forgets. Seriously, just ask sugar, systematic, turncoat, crow, alena, tpg, angee, cricket, dnjack or spatial. Well, just ask anyone I've had a minor disagreement with, I'm bitter like this with almost every despute.
Im kind and considerate to some and even offer them advice. This is because I proxy myself into these figures as me when I was younger or my future son, I like to take the condescending father role with them.
I like to talk publicly about how I fight men for a living and perform sexual acts with hundreds of women. But, I still indulge in laughing at others chasing an image. This is of course because I need supply and I need it badly. It doesn't matter if you're fat, skinny, tall or short. Give me praise and I will protect you with my life and excuse everything you do. You could be a 17 year old edgelord or a middle aged, batshit crazy, homeless woman. Females preferred.
fuck wit me 🔫🔫💯💯
Turncoat stated: source post
Edvard stated: source post
Crow on the fence [Turncoat]
[Seeing as two people have done Edvard already, I've decided to have it spoken from the perspective of Ed's subconscious]
I'm two people, but I only see the side of myself that I want to see. People denying my primary self, claiming that I am this "other me" is gravely insulting towards my pride, and those times that contradict the real me, who I really am, either are in the past, never happened, or I've justified as my having been emotional. When I am triggered, I am blinded to many things despite my insistence to myself that I'm a great detective. Once the anger is lifted I am my real self again, the self I wish people would solely see the same way that I solely see it. I am kind, honorable, and fair, despite other's claims of my sexism and hypocrisy, but cross me and the gloves come off, and once the gloves are off, so is my head. Behind the gloves are an arsenal of collected information and the willingness to threaten it's use, and when I feel betrayed I am capable of anything, as at that point it's no longer me steering, but my pride. My real self has friends here, but my pride only knows enemies.
I'll never say sorry, and why should I? This is Sociopath Community, it comes with the territory, and those before you took it with strength. I like to rip people a new one and challenge them to live up to my standard, to back up their bluffs, to not have their tail between their legs and be a chicken. However, if I were to encounter my match I'd never give him a moment's rest. I hate that which I see out of others that reflect the aspects of myself that I am sensitive about because I need to be that blind to them. I cannot accept that these traits are a part of me without losing the optimism that I value so strongly. What you see as hypocrisy is actually a subconscious self loathing that I must avoid at all costs if I am to continue being the glorious Edvard. I shall forever remain a duality as long as I cannot accept this other side of myself, and the anger will only continue to mount as people reflect the traits I hate about myself, forcing me to face those truths that I'd rather leave buried.
The last person I'd ever want to meet is myself, for that person would be my greatest enemy, my greatest reminder, and hurt the most through being too relatable to accept. I enjoy a good fight, but the cuts need to not pierce too deeply, otherwise I'll black out and stop being myself.
