Do you like receiving them? Or does it make you feel awkward/self-conscious, or obligated to return the favor?
Sometimes. I'm usually indifferent. I only give sincere compliments, even if I am trying to butter somebody up (which is rare bc I'm quite critical, skeptical, pessimistic, and also introverted.)
Are you quite susceptible to flattery, impervious, or somewhere in between? Does who gives the praise and what it's for make a difference?
Hell no. Mostly. And usually.
What about criticism?
See my reactions to praise, above ^
I look at it this way: 80% of the things people say are empty social rituals designed to fill awkward spaces created by silence. So I give ritualized responses to keep things running smoothly. "Hello, nice to meet you. How have you been? That's a nice blouse." "Hello, you too. I've been doing well, thank you. How are you? Thank you, this blouse is one of my favourites. It was a gift from a roommate I stayed with in college."
Compliments are often designed to find out more about a person and how the relationship should proceed. When somebody asks how your day was, they don't really care lol So I don't tell them how I'm actually doing. I just smile and nod and say thank you.
Criticism is an entirely different thing. The only people who are allowed to criticize me are people who have smthg to lose if my performance sucks. Employers, professors, family, roommates, strangers on whose territory I've accidentally trespassed.
Random assholes who criticize for no good reason are just trolls and I ignore them, or I'm rude right back to them.
Even with people who have a right to my attention, baseless or repetitive criticism (nagging) is a good reason for me to end w/e arrangement gave them the authority to demand my attention in the first place. I'll work with people who have a legitimate grievance with me, and I will work to create the desired changes. But the criticism has to be constructive.
3 things.
Is it true?
Is it necessary?
Is it fair?
If the criticism is not presented with the above guidelines in mind, I dismiss it as the ego trip of a petty tyrant, a wallowing MGTOW, or a spurned shrew. None of which is my problem.
If the condescending person is young and unaccustomed to his/her position of authority, I will sometimes ask questions to give him/her an opportunity to rephrase the annoying putdowns. My patience runs out quickly, tho.
