People often fantasise of some kind of beautiful /handsome stranger who'll take their worries away, or even if they don't; they think a person, a place, or an act of some sort will bring some kind of happiness or goodness into their life or that some kind of miracle will occur and it will bring them great advantage. I guess these are ways of getting away from problems
BUT
I'm not talking about fantasising about getting away from problems.
I fantasise constantly about an underground group/community so sacred, ancient and evil but not ruthless, more so they're only evil when crossed. I believe and wish hopefully that one day around 10pm-3am as I walk around through the streets that one of them will come to me and tell me to join them. And finally I can let go of this world and join my real family which is them (not a metaphor for death).
This however unlike the beginning is NOT a fantasy, in my mind I REALLY believe it exists. I sound crazy. I tell myself everyday. But every time I walk through the woods, or down the highway or through the arid softball oval I hear ruselling or see or think I see movement in the shadow I always think I'm being followed by these people. That ONE DAY they will finally approach me and say come home.
Does anyone else fantasise like this or something similar?